Lately, especially today, I've been feeling a little depressed. I've found myself getting angry pretty quickly, and feeling a sense of frustration at a lot of things. My parents seem to be annoying me a lot, and they've made me pretty mad, but what it was over wasn't really even that big of a deal. I also seem to be frustrated and feeling kind of lonely. I think those feelings were caused by some discussion of girlfriends lately that I've heard from friends. I was talking to one of my friends Friday, and in the discussion it came up that he had been going out with his girlfriend for more than two years, and then last night another of my friends told me he was considering telling someone that he liked her. I don't have a girlfriend and have never really had one, and that seems to be getting me down. I feel kind of lonely or left out, like a part of me is missing. Also, I've recently come to the conclusion that I am bisexual, and today was even the first time I could even say it aloud to myself. I have a bit of a crush on this one guy that I know I could never have (it's the same one who's been going out with his girlfriend for more than two years), and it's been frustrating me both because I know I can't have him, and because I can't really tell anybody, because I don't think I'm ready to come out quite yet.
These things combined have been frustrating me so much that I've been very angry at things and has made me a little depressed. I'd rather not talk about it to anybody (parents, friends, counselors, etc) because I don't want to come out quite yet (I have a feeling my parents wouldn't take it too well), and it's just not something that I would be willing to talk about because I think it makes me sound kinda desperate for a boy(?)/girlfriend or something
It's hard to be single when sometimes it feels like the whole world is paired up into couples. Believe me, I've been there.
The thing is (and it took me years to figure this one out, as obvious as it is), there aren't too many people out there who wander around looking for lonely and depressed people that they can date and make happy. Nope, if you want company, romantic or otherwise, you've got to go out and find it. Do volunteer work (nothing like helping others to get your mind off your own troubles), take up a sport, start a new hobby that involves other people. Find something that you will enjoy that will get you out and meeting people.
As for dealing with your sexuality issues, I don't have any advice except to sympathize. Unrequited love is never easy under any circumstances. You might try the Gender Issues forum for advice on that aspect in particular.
When i feel depressed I write about it. It helps me find what i am really feeling, then i feel less confused and a lot better. As for your sexuality, you can't help what you feel or what your atracted to. Your friends should except you for you. If your not ready to come out yet, thats totaly up to you. do what you feel is comfortable.
Posts: 87 | From: PA | Registered: Apr 2002
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hey, I to have been depresed and even though u r a boy and I am a girl I feel pretty much like u. I have been really irratable and depressed lately too.and I think I may also be bisexual as well cuz I have little crush ona really goo friend of mine but anyways I want u to know u aren't the only one out there and that maybe(hold on cuz u might think this is stupid or for girls but try it) get a journal or just write ur feelings in a book cuz u aren't talking face to face with anybody or online/telephone for that matter you are just poring your feelings into a book.I have a journal and it really does help .try it it may help you to. comfusedlilcutie
-sometimes things u may think are only for someone else can work for you.-
[This message has been edited by kythryne (edited 05-11-2002).]
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