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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Support Groups » family problems

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Author Topic: family problems
Member # 5789

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It all bagan 5 and a half years ago when i got melestered before it happened i thought that this wouldn't happen to me but it has and when my mam told my dad he went bolistic and we don't talk or see eah other any more apart from xmas and we still don't talk then hardleys and it is breaking my heart because i want my dad in my life he has now re married to some one else and i don't like her so i don't bother ever since that has happened i can't get on with my life.

I have loving boyfriend and i told him, but when i told him i thought that i would forget about it but i can't as it is eating me away in side like mad we have arguments when i think about it but he does not know what i am thinking as i don't talk to him about it i just start the arguments every time i think about it and it hurts me because i feel that i am taking it out on him all the time as i shouldn't because it wasn't his falt as we weren't togehter then the bloke that did it to me got of from lack of evidence i got some counciling when i had to talk about it to the socail services but that was it.

can anyone help me please or give me some advice on how to cope with it please

Posts: 2 | From: england | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 3072

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Ohhh Cath, I'm sorry that you have so much nasty stuff going on at the moment. I am going to transfer this thread to "Support Groups," where I think you'll be able to find all sorts of people who can help you out, and maybe even some who have been in your position before. Good luck to you!

"Task Force 46, Light Force 34, Engine and Rescue 66, Battalion 3, Division 2; respond into the Greater Alarm Structure Fire at San Pedro and Jefferson. Reported to be a fire at the First Alert fire extinguisher factory..."

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Posts: 2727 | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 5036

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Hi Cath...

I'm sorry you're having a hard time right now. I know a lot of people can identify with what you're going through.

First of all, I'm a little unclear about your home situation. It seems like you are blaming the fact that you don't often see your dad on the fact that you were molested. But it seems from your post that the real reason you don't see your dad is because your parents are divorced, hon.

That can be hard. Your dad may feel guilty about getting divorced, and he may also feel guilty about not having prevented the abuse or protected you. Maybe he feels really bad, too, and has a hard time dealing with that.

As to your boyfriend, you're probably lashing out at him because you're angry. And if being molested isn't enough reason to be angry, having the guy get off would understandably make you angry, too.

It really sounds like you need some help, someone to talk to. Do you know how to start that process? You need to go to your GP and ask for a referral for counselling. In the meantime, you can call Childline and they can also help you - they can be someone to talk to, and help you find some resources. Their website is at and the number is right at the top. It's free to call, although you might have to call a few times. Just keep trying.

Counselling can help you work through your anger and work through what happened, and can help you talk to your dad about your current situation.

Please know that a lot of people have been where you are, and come through it with hard work. It's painful and miserable sometimes, but you can get control of your life back... honestly.

Hope this helps,

[This message has been edited by DarlingBri (edited 11-07-2001).]

Posts: 848 | From: London, UK | Registered: Aug 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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