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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Ethics and Politics » A mom cannot have sexuality?

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Author Topic: A mom cannot have sexuality?
Saffron Raymie
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Every so often, the people in my friendship circle or people on TV will jokingly tease each other by saying that they have engaged in sex with the person they are teasing's mother. This is supposed to be some big insult to the the mother's children.

I really don't understand this.

I often thought it was about sex always being seen as 'bad' for women, and that it somehow hurts them psychologically or physically to have sex outside monogamy. Therefore it is supposedly an insult because the idea of their mother being hurt is so awful for a person.

Then I wondered if it was just about controlling women's sexuality, since it is also applied to sisters too. As, in, ownership and denial of sexual desire from a woman.

Then I wondered if it was just about not wanting to hear about your parents sex life. But, these claims about doing sex with somebody's mother are hardly ever true.

I just don't get it! Does anyone?

[ 08-06-2011, 02:39 PM: Message edited by: RaeRay2112 ]

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'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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Heather
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I'm afraid I'm not entirely clear what you're describing. Are you talking about someone teasing someone who is a woman's child about having had sex with their mother?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Saffron Raymie
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That's the one. It's nearly always used as a joke; they haven't really had sex with their friend's mother.

For example:

Person A: You're really bad at this. (Describing ability to play a video game)

Person B: That's not what your mum said last night!

Person A: Ugh, shut up!

Sometimes it's used on TV comedy shows as an example of the worst thing that could possibly happen:

Character (to his friend): Don't tell me you slept with my mother?!

Character's mum: yep! I loved it!

Character (to his friend who had sex with his mother): I'll kill you!

Ugh.

[ 08-06-2011, 05:23 PM: Message edited by: RaeRay2112 ]

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'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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Heather
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Gotcha.

I think this is one where the context can suggest a variety of possible things going on.

For instance, there certainly is the idea that once someone is a mother, that they are not, or should not, be sexual anymore. Hello, madonna/whore dichotomy.

Then there's the possible issue of someone having a certain ownership of their mother, including sexually, and of someone else having sex with a mother being sexual competition of a sort.

For sure, the deal where even the idea of parents or older people being sexual at all is apparently gross is another than can come into play.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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reeree
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When that joke comes into play, from what I've seen, its just to insult the other person. They think of the person that should be the closest (the mother figure) and make fun of that in order to piss of the other one. A lot of the times its a guy making it so they wouldn't really say "Your dad."
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