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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Ethics and Politics » Sex & Booze

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Author Topic: Sex & Booze
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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I don't normally read this column, so H/T to a friend for posting about this one, guest-written by a college student.

Here's a piece:
Whiskey I owe for a night of mind-blowing sex five times in a row (a personal record): My partner and I were extraordinarily uninhibited, especially when compared to our standard missionary style. I was drinking red wine when I realized I loved my ex-boyfriend. (Unfortunately, I was sober before I had the hutzpa [sic] to say anything.) There was a bottle of champagne in my hand when I streaked across my college campus, a sexually liberating experience that made me appreciate the naked body. In each of these situations, booze helped me let down my guard, and my sex life improved as a result.

But alcohol also owes me a lot. It has left me alone, scared, and wrapped in sheets drenched with my own urine. Three times I have hooked up with my friends’ exes. All three times I was inebriated. I was drunk when I was manipulated into giving my first handjob, when I stole a candy bar, and when I kissed a married man. I have had unprotected sex once. Any guesses to my state of mind?

Here's another:
But what I am trying to teach myself is that every positive experience I’ve had while intoxicated, I am capable of achieving sober. Alcohol is a permission slip, but nobody is stopping me from signing those permission slips myself, in the clear light of day. My bisexuality was not hiding in a keg — it was there all along. Alcohol simply provided the burst of confidence I needed for self-acceptance.

Here’s a toast to the joy of uninhibited sobriety. Because the only thing better than awesome, toe-curling, uninhibited sex is awesome, toe-curling, uninhibited sex that you can remember in exquisite detail the next morning.

I know we've talked about drinking and sex a lot in small chunks with various posts here, and I've brought it up in the blog and main site, but let's have a bigger discussion about it, eh?

What do you think? How do you manage this (and not drinking counts as one way of doing that)? What has your process, if any, been with alcohol and sexuality?

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Member # 29292

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I've had sex a few times while I was under the influence of alcohol, purposely except a few times.

I've sometimes drank before having sex with some of my past partners at times when sex wasn't something I was in the mood for but was pressured into it and wasn't able to state clearly my boudaries and I did that in hope that I'd remember the sex less the next morning or that I'd feel less pain. I felt like I cared less when I was high than when I wasn't and it helped me in that way, even though this wasn't the best way to deal with this.

[ 06-21-2009, 11:04 AM: Message edited by: cool87 ]

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