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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Ethics and Politics » sex

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Author Topic: sex
Member # 12782

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im just wondering something see i live in the city but i have alot of friends that live out in the suburbs and stuff well where i live no one has sex not even the public schools (im not talking about high school im talking about middle school)
well anyways we dont even think about sex the worst we will do is finger. but out in the suburbs there is only about 2 people in the whole school (middle school) who havent had sex and i mean its very rare for where i live for 1 person to do it. so i was just wondering if like where you live has anything to do with it? its just wierd when we get board we go to the movies when they get board they have sex is it becaus they live out in the country and there is not alot of things to do out there?? im just curious!

Posts: 8 | From: atlanta, ga usa!!!!!! | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
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hey, this is a pretty interesting question you've posed. let me phrase it a little differently:

where are young people having sex? what kind of environments have more sexually active teens? isit really more common in the suburbs? the inner cities? farm country?

i'd like to move this to Sexual Ethics and Politics so more poeple can discuss it and give you some input.

more surly than girly...

Posts: 12677 | From: Los Angeles, CA ... somewhere off the 10 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 8796

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i lived in the countryside until i was about 16 and when i started 2ndary school (at age 12) everyone waned to start experimenting and dating but i was like "boys? yuk!" all i was into was horses until i was about 15 and then i didnt have sex until i was nearly 17.

but then i think it depends on the person and when theyre introduced to sex really.
i had one friend who was screaming for attention (which she didnt get from home) and she was having sex at 13.(she lived a few miles away in a village/small town

Posts: 42 | From: United Kingdom | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 7728

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Originally posted by theaterstar346:
but out in the suburbs there is only about 2 people in the whole school (middle school) who havent had sex and i mean its very rare for where i live for 1 person to do it.

Do you think people might just be bragging and saying they've had sex so they don't look inexperienced? Whats acceptable in the suburbs might not seem so acceptable where you live, so your friends might pretend they've done less than they have so they don't feel out of place.

I think it depends on what sort of reaction you get when people find out that you're sexually active; if you get a pat on the back and you feel like you're 'in the club' you're going to feel more pressure to have sex, or lie about it.

I've lived in cities and farm country and I don't think there's much difference in the number of teens having sex, but how open they are with it. In rural communities people know each other better, so pretty soon you get a bonk-by-bonk report on other people's sex lives (whether or not you want to hear about it , just because news gets around quicker.


~Men of quality are not threatened by women's equality~

Posts: 388 | From: UK | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 12155

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now being sexually active myself i have absoloutly no problem w/ anything of this sort but out of observation i have noticed that teens... not even teens are having sex nowadays. Well i had sex for the first time @ 15, granted not of my own will but my choice to have it at 16 i felt was the right one because i checked off everything on your ready or not checklist . but really... when girls come into high school at grade 9 w/ more experience and more partners than my entire group of friends it is a bit... well weird. its harsh to say but overall ive noticed that young girls seem to be dressing differently than they used to, acting more rude and just giving it up like they r the last women on earth! obviously the guys are having no problems w/ this.... and my guys i mean the grade 11's through to oac's (or grade 13) im definantely not out to say girls cant have their fun and experiment im just worried because my sister is approaching her first year in high school and i dont want her going to parties where everyone drinks and hooks up w/ a different older guy every night. i have had no interest in this type of lifestyle and neither does anyone i know who is 16 and over. If anyone who is 13, 14, 15 could please tell me what happened to your generation im quite curious. now i am generalizing your age group but it seems to be everywhere, many different schools, communities everywhere... i just wanna say you guys r worth more than that and if u want to be sexually active PLEASE be safe, physically and emtionally because you don't want to end up in a situation where things get way out of hand.


Posts: 60 | From: Canada | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
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I grew up in a remote, very rural part of California. A lot of people here are Mormon, or they're devout Christians. Many of the families came over during the Great Depression (ever read Steinbeck's Grapes of Wrath? that'd be my town). They are your typical middle America types of people. So how are their kids as far as sexual activity goes?

Well, you get two types. You have the Bible-thumping, God-fearing preachers of abstinence and chastity. they lived righteous lives and were model citizens. Then you had the other bunch of kids who would go drink in a cornfield past the edge of town, cruise around on weekends in their raised giant trucks, and screw around like there was no tomorrow.

My school had a well-above-average percent of teen pregnancy. My senior class vice president had to drop out for a while 'cause she had a baby. The girl who was setting the curve in my trig class dropped out 'cause she was expecting, so after that *I* got to set the curve. One girl had an abortion, and everybody shunned her after that. And there was a girl on my volleyball team who hid her pregnancy quite well; she was an aggressive player and would dive for the ball every chance she got. it was clear that a lot of my classmates were sexually active, and it was very, VERY clear that the silence about contraception was leading to some problems (my parents opted me out of sex ed, but it didn't matter, it wasn't anything I didn't already know).

more surly than girly...

Posts: 12677 | From: Los Angeles, CA ... somewhere off the 10 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 12433

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Hey there was an article in the paper here about how all these middle school kids were getting chlamydia and syphilis. I thought that was crazy- no one in my middle school had sex (well, one girl I knew was raped the summer after 8th grade but that's obviously not on purpose). And apparently, here in Louisville, there's all these 10-14 yr old kids going to the dr. thinking they have strep, when really they have chlamydia or syphilis in their throat! WTF? It's apparently a big problem in suburban schools here. On the other hand, both myself and my partner lost our virginities at 15 (to different people), but our 17 yr old siblings (his bro, my sis) are both still virgins, who have really hardly even date thus far. Go figure, eh?

Julian's rockin mama!

Posts: 11 | From: Louisville, KY, amerikkka | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 2295

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honesty issues & personal knowledge aside, location has a lot to do with opportunity...

living in a city where there are less private locations than in a more rural area can make it hard to find a place to have sex. less people = one less problem, which -being location- can be a big one.

for a number of years, the fact that i lived in a rural area gave me options that a more populated area wouldn't necessarily. the woods, sheds, cabins, camping trips, parents having to drive into town, having the excuse of having to drive a fair distance to clubs/get togethers/whatever where truly not all that time was spent in transit, and so on.

plus, when you've more people in a smaller area (large town/city schools & neighborhoods, etc) means the more likely anything you say will get back to someone you don't want it to -so you cover your butt better when you *do* have sex...

in short:

1) higher population density causes less availability of safe & secret sexual encounters.

2) higher population density means that when encounters do occur, individuals must be extra secretive about it and not admit to it as freely.

those are what my experiences between podunk & later very-populated areas lead me to think....

Posts: 160 | Registered: Jan 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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