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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Ethics and Politics » Dreaded Words *gasp*

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Author Topic: Dreaded Words *gasp*
MiSs_Behave
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Member # 8605

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Okay, feel free to delete this if you wish but..

I find it so frustrating when the word "vagina" or "penis" are said in good context and the reaction of people is like "how rude!" or "don't say those words". Umm.. excuse me for being forward but they are body parts, they are not disgusting or rude or gross.. they are us. I am very comfortable with my body and it does not haze me to talk about issues relating to sex, I know not all people are like this but.. puhlease. Penis and vagina are not swear words, and the sooner people realise this the better I think.

Ah!

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Follow your inner moonlight, don't hide the MaDdNeSs...


Posts: 56 | From: Land of Oz | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Maharet
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Yes, yes yes. I agree totally.

I'd like to go one step further, too. I hve no problem with the word penis (except a slight embarrasment when I say it verbally, which I hate) but I don't like the word vagina as much.

This is getting into technicalities, I know. For me, the word "vagina" means sheath, and doesn't include the labia, clitoris (very important! lol) etc. I much prefer the word vulva, or even better the word cunt (is that still censored by the net nanny?).

What do other ppls think?

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"If you don't like gays, then they're everywhere, coming out of the woodwork to corrupt little children... but if you are gay, especially if you're in high school, you're the only one in the universe..."


Posts: 66 | From: Perth, Australia | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Celtic Daisy
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 2971

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Why don't you check out this thread?
http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/Forum8/HTML/000441.html

Which, Maharet started.

By the way, Maharet, did you get your name from the vampire chronicals?

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'You've got the eyes of ten women. Not in a jar! I wasn't accusing you. I just mean your eyes are really nice'-coupling

Erin Jane
~Scarleteen Advocate~


Posts: 1747 | From: Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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I think one just has to be proactive in a way which is effective.

In other words, takihg about sex or sexual anatomy in a way, or in places, or with people where you know it's going to make perople very uncomfortable, generally isn't conducive to fixing the stigma. It actually tends to simply reinforce it by making people MORE uncomfortable if they were uncomfy already.

To boot, I agree it's also important when you're using those words to use them correctly to begin with. Most people, for insyance, use the word "vagina" to mean the female genitals, when that isn't what the word even means to begin with.

I suppose what I'm saying is that of you want to take the stigma off of those words, it's usually most effective to do so with a lot of poise or sensitivity, and instead of being reactive or defensive when you get a poor reaction, to ask questions, like "Why do those words make you uncomfortable? Are there scenarios in which you ARE comopftrable using those words? How can I talk about sex around you in a way that you are comfortable with?"

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Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

My epitaph should read: "She worked herself into this ground."
-- Kay Bailey Hutchinson


Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
MiSs_Behave
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Hmm. Good point there Miz Scarlet. Being proactive is the way to go, and when I am faced with a reaction from someone such as "Don't use that word, its rude!" I usually politely ask them why they find it offensive and what word they would like me to use instead. This leads me onto why I think sex-education, or just human anatomy study works wonders... it gets people comfortable with these types of words and lets them be aware of their body, in a more informative way.

Here I am thinking about what other words could be used as substitute for vagina or penis.. umm..

Share your words, cause I can't seem to come up with any!

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Follow your inner moonlight, don't hide the MaDdNeSs...


Posts: 56 | From: Land of Oz | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Maharet
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Yup, I agree with you there, Miz Scarlet . I find it's also a good idea to shape general language depending on who you're talking to. eg if someone saying "Flippin' heck" like one of my uni friends does, then I know I'm less likely to start saying f-this and s-that etc.

In conversations with people I don't know all that well, I tend to use vulvua if the topic arrises, and cunt is reserved for family, and ppl who I know are cool with it.

A couple of other things:
1. A toast to who ever took cunt off the (very) dreaded word list!
2. When I looked for "The C-word" thread in the search function, using those exact words, I couldn't find it, so thanks Daisy.
3. I did indeed 'steal' the nicname from The Queen of the Damned. All Hail Anne Rice!

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"If you don't like gays, then they're everywhere, coming out of the woodwork to corrupt little children... but if you are gay, especially if you're in high school, you're the only one in the universe..."


Posts: 66 | From: Perth, Australia | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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