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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Ethics and Politics » birth control without parental consent

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Author Topic: birth control without parental consent
surferChicka
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Member # 2232

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hey guys, i'm writing a paper on this subject, and i would like to hear your guys' opinions on the subject. aLL of em! gOOd, bad, agrEE, disagrEE, whatever.

big mahalos 2 you aLL

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peace, love, & seXwax!


Posts: 117 | From: Honolulu, HI | Registered: Dec 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Lin
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Okie, I am under birth control without my parents' consent. Mainly coz my dad would freak out if he knew I was having sex and while I think my mum would be cool about it, I don't think I am ready to tell them about my sex life.

I think it's perfectly ok. I mean, I am seeing a gyno regularly and I am protecting myself. There are worse things that I could be doing.


Posts: 2294 | From: Singapore | Registered: Dec 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
LilBlueSmurf
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Lin ... You're 19 aren't you? I would say that's grounds in itself that you wouldn't have to "ask" their permission. Maybe tell them, but you dont' really have to ...

I'm on the pill, but both of my parents know. However, it's slightly different for me. I started 21 months ago, before I was ever in a really serious relationship. But i told my mom the first time i ever had sex (intercourse) w/ my bf and she just made sure that i'm still on the pill (i don't live w/ her) and that i'd have condoms w/ me at all times. Dad doesn't know. We think he knows that i'm sexually active but is in denial. I haven't come right out and said to him "Daddy i'm having sex", but I'm pretty sure he knows. I think he's happier not knowing why i'm REALLY on the pill.

Parents shouldn't have to know. They don't have to know if their children are buying condoms ... and the doctor can decide if the pill will cause any harm. I'm sure more girls would be on the pill if they felt they could do it w/o anyone knowing.


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Rizzo
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I too am on birth control without my parents knowing, but I'm over 18. However, I don't think age should make a difference. While ideally parents should be able to talk about sex with their kids, that's just not always the case. To me, health is the most important thing. If a kid is going to get a disease or get pregnant because s/he doesn't have access to contraception, then I think that's more of a tragedy than being slightly dishonest with your parents.
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Mary
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I believe it's always good to be honest with the people around you. I'm not necesarily saying that parents MUST know when their children are sexually active, but I think it'd be respectful for someone to tell their parents that they're on birth control. Emotional well-being for a daughter or son and their parents are importnant as well. If parents are strongly against their chilren being sexually active, then it would be better not to tell them. Especially if it would cause emotional stress or pain. And it's better to be having sex without birth control while your parents know than having sex with birth control and having the parents not know. It's all about safety and health. Whatever works for the situation

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Never criticize someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes, because then you're a mile away, and you've got their shoes!


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Heather
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Now when I was your age...

(waving the cane...kidding)

...but when I was, consent was required at my clinic only if you were under 14, and only if you wanted to be on the pill. And that wasn't a law, that was the clinics guideline. And though my mother didn't support me in it, my father did, and I told them both about it regardless because I felt I could and I felt I should. And again, ideally, all young people COULD tell their parents, and even if the parents didn't support them directly in doing so, they could respect their choices and think in their best interests and trust their teens decisions.

I can actually support that kind of guideline simply because for a parent to care for their child's health, they really do need to know what medications they are on and the status of their reproductive health. I can also support it being a GUIDELINE not a law, because there are situations in which if a teens parents found out they were sexually active their lives and health could be in danger due to physical abuse.

As well, in terms of birth control that does involve health issues that a young adult may not even know about (do they know if there is a history of heart disease or cervical cancer in their family, for instance?), it is important because it could endanger that person's health a great deal.

I think honestly we don't need a law for parental consent for birth control methods. I think we can have a great deal of faith in the ethics and caring of doctors and clinicians to know when they just have to say, "I can't prescribe this for you..." for whatever reason, be it because of medical history they don't have, or because they feel it could endanger the health of their patient, or because they know it just isn't a method that will work practically with that patient.

But I also feel very strongly that non-invasive birth control and safer sex tools and methods should have no age-limit upon them.

And heck, in a really smart society, they'd be free.

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Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

"If you're a bird, be an early early bird --
But if you're a worm, sleep late." - Shel Silverstein


Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
surferChicka
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i'm reaLLy soRRy guys...did i forget to mention it's birth control given to MINORS without consent??

soRRy!!!

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peace, love, & seXwax!


Posts: 117 | From: Honolulu, HI | Registered: Dec 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Lin
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Nope you didn't mention it chicka.

As I said earlier, I don't think parental consent is necessary when it comes to contraception. Unless the child is below the age of consent to have sex. Then there is no point in getting parental consent coz it will be considered statutory rape and I can't understand why a 14 year old who isn't having sex would want to insert a diaphragm in her. Of course, it is harder when it comes to the Pill because girls do use it for period cramps and endometreosis and such. But then, it isn't advisable for young girls to be on the Pill if I'm not wrong.

On the other hand, if we are talking about condoms which can be readily bought, I honestly can't find a way to make parental consent work. DO they sign a consent form allowing me to buy 10 packets of condoms? What if I suddenly decide to have sex but I cannot buy them because I am a minor. Do I go without protection? And if I buy the condoms in bulk, what if they disintegrate or something after too long?


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Beppie
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In a perfect world, kids would talk to their parents, who would naturally be loving, caring and open, about having sex. In the real world however, kids are afraid to do so, not all parents will respond to such a gesture constructively, and as Miz Scarlet said, some can be abusive. The fact is that some underage kids are going to have sex without parental consent, and they need protection from STDs and pregnancy.
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XxFIFxX
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I think it's alright. Your parents don't need to know every detail in your sexual life. Now it's nice to be open with your parents, and that really is a good thing. Honestly, I believe that you are your own person, if you feel you're ready for sex, then go for it. And if you're going to do so, you should have some form of birth control, shows responsibility! Ah ha ha

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*I wish I didn't care, but I do*


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Kimiko
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Here's what I did. I really wanted to go on the pill for the longest time but I knew my parents would think that I was sexualy active although that was the whole intension. I told them that I was using it as a form to regulate my period. Which wasn't lying because I wanted to do that anyway. So, I think if you have parents that can handle it, let them know that you're on it. There could be alot more trust. But if not, don't let them know. They can't possibly know every little thing that goes on around in your life, but don't keep them out.
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surferChicka
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speaking of aLL this...

my mom found out what my topic for my paper is, and she totaLLy fliPPed!! she wrote me this note saying how dEEply troubled she was that i agrEEd with distribution of birth control to minors without parental permiSSion. she aSSumed that b/c i agrEEd with the topic, that i was geTTing birth control and that i am sexuaLLy active and having intercourse with my boyfriend. i cant believe her! i picked the topic b/c everybody else tOOk euthanasia and abortion!

soRRy...had 2 vent

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peace, love, & seXwax!


Posts: 117 | From: Honolulu, HI | Registered: Dec 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
ThisGuy
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Just hit the waves, and wait for her to cool off some.

*Envious*

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Cranial space for rent.


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smittenkitten
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I think that there shouldn't be an age limit on contraceptives and the like - people will have sex underage no matter what so at least it will be SAFE sex. I also think that sex toys (not BDSM) should be availible to kids over 13 - if they can get pleasure from a vibrator then there is no NEED to have sex. I think alot of todays laws are based around social taboos, not what is really right and wrong.

Love,
Winnie :0)

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Posts: 465 | From: Canberra, ACT, Australia | Registered: Jan 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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