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Author Topic: Fat
pink
Activist
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Fat threads. Has anyone else noticed the surplus of these we've had lately?

I think most of us have, and if you're like me, they're getting annoying. And it brought me to ask myself-What is fat?

How do we define the term fat, what examples do we follow that lead us to the conclusion? Is it a number on a scale? If it is, then how can an Olympic runner be considered fat next to Kate Moss?

Or is it the media? I actually think ther media is doing a trifle better at portraying real people. When I read a magazine (except for Cosmo), I see women and girls of all different shapes-vuluptous, thin, short, muscular, whatever.

Is it because of the advantages we may have over other countries and other statuses, where people die from starvation every day?

I can't place my finger on anything. Can you guys? What is fat? What makes us fat?

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Bad Cats!!


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Hanne
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Another couple of good questions to add to your list, pink, would be:

Does it really matter if someone is fat? Isn't it possible to be a happy healthy worthwile loveable person at any size?

What would the world be like if more people saw being fat as just another form of human variation -- like being Asian, or having blonde hair, or being bald? How would we treat others (and ourselves) differently if we regarded being fat as just another difference?

Do you think that some people use "fat" as a scapegoat, and blame their problems on their body size or shape when really, there might well be other things going on?

How about people using the word "fat" as a weapon or an insult? What are people REALLY saying when they say "You're FAT!", and does it necessarily have anything at all to do with whether someone is or isn't fat in actual physical fact?

Something to think about: one of the most insulting things you can say to most guys is to tell him he has a teeny-tiny penis. One of the most insulting things you can say to most women is that they're fat. What's the relationship between the two, and why the heck does it push our buttons so hard and make us so mad to hear these things?

And here's my last one:

Name 5 fat people you think are really cool. Here are mine: Scarleteen Advocate ErinK, Camryn Manheim the actress, Luciano Pavarotti the opera singer, Drew Carey the actor, and... ME!

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Hanne Blank
Co-Editor, Scarleteen

Start a Revolution -- Stop Hating Your Body!


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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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I like the last one.

Here are mine: Hanne and Erin both, actresses Kathy Bates and Sarah Bernhardt, comedian Lou Costello (of Abbott and Costello), trans-vamp galore Divine, singers Cass Elliot (known as "Mama Cass") and Queen Latifah, jazz musician Dizzy Gillespie, groundbreaking female italian painter Artemisia Gentileschi, actress and musician Bette Midler, blues singer Ma Rainey, feminists Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Bella Azbug, actor and director Orson Welles, comedian Mae West, and Miss Piggy!

Okay, so that was more than five. I was enjoying myself.


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LilBlueSmurf
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Roseanne Barr ... Rosie O'Donnell ... Big Bird and Snuffleupagus LOL
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pink
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My favorite comedian, Margaret Cho, George Clinton, my Papa, the best father I ever had , Santa Claus, and Tim & Brenda, the lifeguards that taught me everything I know.

Thanks Hanne, I meant to address the subject of how it matters more than I actually did. Thanks for putting it in .

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Bad Cats!!


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lemming
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Hee. Fun topic, guys.

Put me down for: Bette Midler (now and then), Oprah (well, sometimes), Hanne!, ErinK!, Sarah Bernhardt (ee!), Drew Carey, and I've gotta second the Snufflupagus vote ;].

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~lemming, Scarleteen Advocate

want to know the inner lemming? read her diary at http://innerlemming.diaryland.com/.
"Is love like the sweet, bitter taste of marmalade on burnt toast?"


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ErinK
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Thanks for the compliments!

Hm. My favorite fat people...

My partners Glenn and Allan, who are wonderful for a number of reasons other than being round and snuggleable, Hanne (of course), my friends Tina and Age and Amy (all major babes), Kevin Smith (mmmm....), Kevin Murphy (the voice of Tom Servo in Mystery Science Theater 3000), and many others that I'm probably forgetting.

Erin


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Milke
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DISCLAIMER: The opinions voiced below are mine, and do not apply to my computer. It got offended and restarted itself when I first tried writing this reply.

Pea Hix - Started a band based entirely on the Optigan ( http://www.optigan.com ). Look into the page and hopefully you'll get just how cool that is.

Steven Page - Main dude in the Barenaked Ladies. How many other guy bands sing about stuff like menstruation and electricity?

Daniel Pinkwater - Kids' writer. I've mentioned him before, but I still thing he's pretty darn cool.

Definitely Hanne, and most of the people mentioned above. Like I even need to say why.

[This message has been edited by Milke (edited 09-30-2003).]


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twinkletoze
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hey is it ok for me to state here that i absolutely detest cosmo?if it isnt then board moms feel free to edit me...or atleast tell me to edit me
cosmo to me is one of the assistants in pushing back the progress of women...mentally..which i think is the most important

i am overweight
i used to be kind of upset about it...not obsessive but just unhappy
then one day i organsed a group to raise some funds to buy some gifts for a childrens home wehre the children there were diagnosed with full blown AIDS
they were either abandoned at birth or thiuer parents had later abandoned trhem becasue they were unable to care for them.

at the home there was this 13 month old baby that weighed about 5pounds
can u imagine that?i cried my eyes out

and since then i have been happy with my body
as long as you are healthy thats all that counts!!!!!!!!!!

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smile:)
its the second best thing u can do with your lips


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lemming
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quote:
Originally posted by twinkletoze:
hey is it ok for me to state here that i absolutely detest cosmo?if it isnt then board moms feel free to edit me...or atleast tell me to edit me

I think most of us share that view, too. Cosmo is occasionally good for a smirk, but I doubt you'll find many of its defenders here. =]

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~lemming, Scarleteen Advocate

want to know the inner lemming? read her diary at http://innerlemming.diaryland.com/.
"Is love like the sweet, bitter taste of marmalade on burnt toast?"


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Hanne
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I have to disagree. Cosmopolitan can be extremely useful. For instance, if you are ever stuck for a firelighter, Cosmo burns very nicely. Be sure to riffle the pages first to trap air between the leaves, they burn much quicker that way.

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Hanne Blank
Co-Editor, Scarleteen

Start a Revolution -- Stop Hating Your Body!


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lemming
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Oh, Hanne, you KILL me!!! =]

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~lemming, Scarleteen Advocate

want to know the inner lemming? read her diary at http://innerlemming.diaryland.com/.
"Is love like the sweet, bitter taste of marmalade on burnt toast?"


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PoetgirlNY
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Favorite fat people(no particular order):
1. Marilyn Wann
2. Hanne
3. Erin
4. Camryn Manheim
5. My aunt Lynn
6. My cousin Gudrun
7. My cousin Raven(starting to notice I have lots of cool fat relatives?)
8. Me(If Bette Middler counts, I do!)

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Limes Are Sublime


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CallMeBuffChick
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Fats just not in my vocab. Everyone comes in differant shapes and sizes. It's being human not being fat.

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To be a princess is to be an actress, but not necessarily a good one.


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4.exe
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my favorite fat people... mm... interesting
1-my mom, she kick ***
2-Frank Black, also known as Black Francis, the vocalist of the Pixies!
3-James McNew, is the bass player of Yo La Tengo (indie pop band from us). He is a really cool guy, i watched a concert last week of his band and it was great.
4-Eric Schwartz, it´s a really great cartoonist(check out wwww.sabrina-online.com)
5-I think the fifth, is me
that´s all
4.exe

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Wakeboarder Chick
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I don't think there is a true definition for "fat". everyone feels diferently about themselves, and it takes a lot of work to turn those views around if their not positive ones. I know from experience. I know everyone should be proud of who they are as a person, but for some people it's harder. I don't mean this to offend anyone but instead of being annoyed with all the "fat" topics, seek to undersatnd why people might feel this way!
I"m someone who is very proud of the person I am, I just don't like the shell I'm in, I consistently work to change that point of view and I'm getting there, but for people like me, it's nice to have help, not frustration!

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"In a world where you can be anything, be yourself!"

'Turn your frown upside down, cuz you never know who's falling in love with your smile! :)"


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Hanne
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Well, honey, I'm afraid that if you find all of this frustrating, you're missing a big chunk of the point of life, which is this:

Life happens to everyone, and it doesn't matter how much they weigh or whether or not they're fat (or think of themselves that way).

The simple fact is that the size or weight of your body isn't very relevant to your ability to be a happy, healthy, loving, worthwhile human being. It just isn't.

You're welcome to try to change what your body looks like if you'd like to. We wouldn't stop you from piercing your ears or cutting your hair or dyeing it green, from getting a pedicure or wearing high heeled sneakers, getting a tattoo, piercing your lip, or growing your nails until they're 5 inches long. We won't try to counsel you away from shaving your pubic hair or letting your underarm hair grow so long it brushes the ground, or hell, even filing your teeth to points if you really want to do it.

But we aren't gonna tell you you need to, either. All of these things -- just like dieting or losing weight -- are primarily cosmetic changes. What you decide to do, or not do, with your body in that regard is entirely up to you.

But this isn't a dieting site. And it isn't going to be. Repeated research has shown that up to 97% of diets fail over the long term (i.e., people gain the weight back). Studies by the Cooper Aerobics Institute over many years have shown that physical fitness, not weight or body size, is the best indicator of overall health and physical endurance. And even the American Medical Association has come out in print saying that for most people, most of the time, diets cause more problems than they solve. There's no compelling reason that we, or anyone, should recommend dieting or weight loss to people who do not have an immediate health-related reason for needing to change their body weight. If someone does need that, they should talk to a doctor, not to us. And weight loss or dieting for any other reasons constitutes a primarily cosmetic change. And, as I already said above, we don't tell people to make cosmetic changes to their bodies, or what cosmetic changes to make. We just don't.

And we don't promote people making cosmetic changes to their bodies and tell them that it's going to fundamentally change their lives. It won't, and saying that it will is irresponsible. Just like we don't tell people that "of course the first time you have penis-in-vagina intercourse you'll have a huge mindblowing orgasm," we don't tell people "if you lose weight and get the 'perfect' body then your life will be perfect and everyone will love you." Neither one is true, and we'd be doing a disservice to people if we didn't say that these are both myths.

Here at Scarleteen we believe that people have the right to do what they want with their bodies, whether that be sexually or otherwise. But we also feel like there is a WIDE variety of humanity that deserves to be treated just that way -- like they're human. So we do. And sometimes, that means reaching out to groups of people who are often NOT treated very humanely because of what their bodies look like, including fat people.

Being fat, or having fat on your body, is not a sin. It isn't wrong, it isn't bad, it isn't evil, it isn't a moral failing, it won't send you to Hell, and it won't make your life miserable. It doesn't mean you're stupid, irresponsible, have no willpower, don't care about how you look, or are unattractive. I've been a fat person all my life, at many different weights and sizes. I should know.

Likewise, losing weight doesn't make you a better person, a more moral person, or a less miserable person. At times in my life, I've lost quite substantial amounts of weight, and I know all this is true, too. It's just as possible to be miserable and dislike your body at 110 pounds as it is at 310 pounds.


Many people find that their bodies are where they end up focusing their dissatisfaction with their lives or with themselves. People often think that "if I were thinner, I would be more attractive," or that they would have better luck, or a better job, or better relationships, if they were thinner or if their body were shaped differently.

Believe me when I tell you that it's all a big case of "the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence." Body shape, weight, and size simply don't change life all that much. Take it from someone who has been every step of the way from 135 pounds to well over 250 pounds (and back and forth several times at various steps along the way) in her lifetime: what matters isn't how much you weigh, but how much you are able to accept your ENTIRE self, body, mind, and spirit.

That said, if you still want support for weight-loss dieting and exercising, please feel free to go to one or more of the literally HUNDREDS, if not thousands, of sites on the web that specialize in that. But this isn't one of them.

We believe -- and know, from personal experience -- that people can have fabulous lives and fabulous sex lives in a HUGE range of sizes and weights. And that's really what's important to us.

------------------
Hanne Blank
Co-Editor, Scarleteen

Start a Revolution -- Stop Hating Your Body!

[This message has been edited by Hanne (edited 03-06-2001).]


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Lin
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Brava Hanne.


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Purple Lemonade
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Hmm....
My fave fat ppl would have to be:

1.Drew Carey
2.That girl off the Practice with a ton of earrings.. Camryn somthing
3.My cat (does that count as a person?)
4.My teacher
5. My friend Nikki
6.Me!!
Well got to go....
Buh Bye! Luv Marianna


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Milke
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Okay, Purple, if your cat counts, I know so many cool fat people I'm not even going to bother counting them.
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alaska
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Brava, Hanne! (And I WILL order your book, once I can afford to order US books at amazon again....with the current dollar rating, it's impossible to buy US books for a decent priece, really; but that was a sidenote, really.)

As for fat people who are great, to all the people you've listed (my list would have been pretty similar, I guess - and Hanne and Erin would be on it, definitely, gals! - You rock!) I want to add two more people:

*Germany's former president Roman Herzog, who did a fab job in his 4 year term trying to help break down the wall inside the people's heads. (Sorry that I'm listing a conservative politician, but he really did an excellent job, and always protected what I felt was important. Plus his commentary of the german "basic law" was absolutely brilliant. Duh, the things law people like *lol*)

*Hella von Sinnen, famous german comedienne/singer/writer and lesbian activist. Her partner is the daughter of a former german chancellor and they have been in the media for years campaigning for the right to get married. And we have "gay marriages" (technically called "registered partnerships") now; and they are accepted (apart from Bavaria) and IMHO, that is partly due to both of them being so openly lesbian for years and years and campaigning on and on and on. Oh, and Hella is not only lesbian and fat, she's also terribly, terribly funny.

[This message has been edited by Alaska (edited 03-10-2001).]


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Hanne
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Alaska, you just reminded me...

How could I *possibly* have forgotten Marianne Sagebrecht, one of my favorite German actresses ever? She's a great actress and she's *so* sexy!

------------------
Hanne Blank
Co-Editor, Scarleteen

Start a Revolution -- Stop Hating Your Body!


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alaska
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oh, Yes, Hanne you're right! And "Out of Rosenheim" is a classic, really.

[This message has been edited by Alaska (edited 03-10-2001).]


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alaska
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...Oh, and you know what I heard this morn? Marianne Sägebrecht and Dirk Bach (another fab, fat german comedian) have just joined the german version of Semsamestreet full time. Good fat role models. *lol*
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beautiful_teardrop
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I don't find Bette Midler fat...
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Hanne
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Bette's gone up and down from downright skinny to somewhat zaftig over the years, and back again. I think that a lot of people see her big breasts and her round face and don't look any further, really -- I tend to agree that she doesn't seem particularly fat, but I guess that's just one more example that what "fat" is is incredibly subjective and that people are prone to make statements about whether someone is "fat" based on all kinds of perceptions that may or may not actually have anything to do with someone's weight or what percentage of their body weight is actually fat or not.

------------------
Hanne Blank
Co-Editor, Scarleteen

Start a Revolution -- Stop Hating Your Body!


Posts: 1538 | From: boston, ma, USA | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Milke
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Hanne, my aforementioned friend saw you on SexTV a few nights ago, found you pretty, found you informative, and liberated, and was quite impressed. Just thought I should mention.
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Lisa D
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I can't believe no one has mentioned the utterly *YUMMY* chef Mario Batali! He's a total hottie!

I also think Kevin Smith is super-cute.

As far as women go, Hanne is my #1 choice but I also like Emme and Camryn Manheim!


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