While I'm not against either phone sex or cybersex per se, and I think you can learn a lot about sex and sexual communication with them, I also think that if you feel out of control, that should be setting off your warning bells.
Feeling out of control is not a good thing. When we feel out of control, we make stupid decisions. When we make stupid decisions, we can get hurt, sometimes very seriously.
My advice to you is this: STOP. Take a vacation. Don't do it for a month or so. Find a hobby, masturbate a lot, go for long walks with friends, volunteer for an organization you are interested in, write a novel, whatever... but do something ELSE for a while. Give yourself some space and time to think about what you're doing and, more importantly, why you're doing it.
You may have very good internal reasons for wanting to explore cybersex and phone sex. If so, and you decide that your reasons are good enough for you, then you can go back to figuring out how you might want to carry on your sex life in those realms. If not, you've learned something really important about yourself.
I think you'll have to gauge for yourself the level of relative risk in having cybersex or phone sex if you choose to continue doing it. Phone sex gets expensive, and even calling collect leaves you open to call tracing and, in some cases, Caller ID. Online or on the phone, your anonymity may not be as secure as you think it is. But these aren't the most important issues here -- the most important issue is figuring out why you're feeling out of control, and why you're doing what you're doing and why you've been wanting to do it.
Associate Editor, Scarleteen
"Be Excellent To Each Other" -- Bill and Ted