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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Pregnancy Scares » If Iím no pregnant, why am I feeling this way?

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Author Topic: If Iím no pregnant, why am I feeling this way?
anxietygirl123
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Ok so I know this pregnancy scare question has been asked several times by different people but Iím seriously freaking out. So here are a few facts about my question: I have never been sexually active (never had sex as in vaginal intercourse) therefore I am a virgin and this is VERY important in my culture for unmarried girls. Right now, I am in my first relationship with a great guy who has been sexually active before we got together. I donít mind this and I donít mind that we make-out etc. What I do mind is when we take it to another level. This is the basis of my pregnancy scare right now.
I have read multiple articles on Scarleteen (before I continue I really do THANK YOU so much for providing all this information since in my culture you canít ask anyone about these things, it is considered a sin for young girls to do so and parents become suspicious). After reading your amazing articles I realized that I have NO RISK of pregnancy. My boyfriend has ďfingeredĒ me twice and I donít even think it is considered fingering as he hasnít broken my hymen, no blood came out so he didnít scratch anything, and I didnít feel him go too far up. So he was merely messaging my clitoris (again you guys are awesome for explaining female genitals). Each time my boyfriend had done this we were both fully clothed (underwear, jeans, leggings etc.) But the second time was a little different, my boyfriend touched my clitoris with his finger then his penis began to annoy him as it was moving around and he unzipped his pants and adjusted it with his hands and then continued to message my clitoris with his finger. Again, we were both fully clothed. Now when my boyfriend adjusted his penis he left his pants undone and we began to dry hump. I know all of this equals NO risk of pregnancy on my part because you address this multiple times in your articles.
BUT I am still terrified. Why? Because I feel something is wrong with my body. I have an apparent discomfort in my lower abdomen and my breasts/chest area is now a little sore and tingly. I have also lost a lot of weight (which isnít a pregnancy symptom I know) and I feel nauseous most of the day (or at least every time I remember that I might be pregnant). Iím also very anxious. I also pee frequently and feel like I donít fully urinate correctly and I have experienced shortness of breath. All these symptoms occurred about a week after the last time he fingered me which was the day right after my last period. So my question is what is wrong with me? I keep feeling like maybe I missed something or was too caught up in the moment to notice that something happened to cause me to be pregnant. And if that isnít the case then why am I feeling this way? I took a urine sample to be analyzed for infections but I didnít get the results yet and I am literally worried sick. Also I have to add that there was NO visible ejaculation at all and that my boyfriend DID NOT wash his hands before he touched me (which is wrong, I know). I really would appreciate your help to help me understand why I am feeling this way and if I am wrong to think that I have NO RISK of pregnancy whatsoever?

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anxietygirl123
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I would just like to add that I just got my Urinary analysis back right now and everything was completely normal except for the pus cell count which was slightly higher than the normal. Which could mean that I have a urinary tract infection like you stated in one of your articles. But I'm still terrified...could all these symptoms I'm having all account for this infection and not a pregnancy? I would really appreciate your help!
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September
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Urinating frequently and feeling like you still have to go are symptoms of a UTI, so I would urge you to follow up on that.

However, the fact that you describe feeling nauseous when you think about the possibility of pregnancy points to that being a reaction to your fears, rather than a symptom of anything.

Are you usually a very anxious person? How do you usually take care of yourself when you experience anxiety in other areas of life?

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Johanna
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"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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anxietygirl123
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Thank you so very much for the fast reply. I am actually a VERY anxious person and my close friends and family always point out that if I don't learn to relax I will not be able to function in life. I usually am more anxious when I feel like I did something wrong or not perfectly. A good example of this would be the anxiety I feel when I have assignments due for courses etc. When I experience this anxiety I usually cry it out and let it pass. But I can't seem to do that with this pregnancy scare although I know that I have no risk. Every time my body does something different I say to myself that its another sign of pregnancy. Now I'm just waiting everyday for my next period and the worry is eating me alive.
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September
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I am sorry to hear that, anxietygirl. That sounds really stressful. Have you thought about getting some counseling to help you cope better?

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Johanna
Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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anxietygirl123
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I have thought about it but I don't know where to go and who to talk to. I would love to not be so scared all the time but it seems to be how it is everyday now. It's like I got used to it. But I still hate it. I'm sorry if this will seem like an annoying question but do you think I am worrying for no reason about this whole pregnancy thing? or could there be a possibility hence all the weird things I am feeling with regards to my body? I guess anxietygirl was a perfect choice for my username hahaha [Smile]
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September
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Since this anxiety is a general problem that presents in all areas of your life, it sounds like your general doctor would be a good choice for someone to talk to. They can refer you to a therapist who has experience in dealing with people who struggle with anxiety.

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Johanna
Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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anxietygirl123
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Thanks for the reply!I will look into that and hopefully won't have a pregnancy scare and/or any scare for that matter [Smile] And I must say this site is a life saver!
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September
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You are very welcome! Glad to be of help. [Smile]

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Johanna
Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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anxietygirl123
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Hello again. I'm sorry to be freaking out and posting on here but I'm really freaking out. And I did the stupid thing of searching other sites online which made me freak out even more. Now I am CONVINCED I am pregnant even though from the articles I have read on here it states that I am not. But I've been feeling very pms-y for the past week and my period isn't even due for another week. I never get these cramps this early before my period and I'm literally worried sick. What is wrong with me?
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anxietygirl123
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I know that I have to be patient. And I will see my dr tomorrow but I'm just super worried. I literally regret even kissing my boyfriend and will definitely talk to him about slowing down but until then I'm terrified. I'm hoping I get my period soon or figure out why I am feeling so weird. Any suggestions to why I might be feeling this way (abdominal cramping much like period pain)? Do you think I might be pregnant after all!?
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September
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I am sorry to hear you are still feeling so anxious. Obviously searching for pregnancy symptoms online is not a helpful thing to do. Why don't you try to focus on some more helpful things to do? This article might be a good read for you: Self-Care a La Carte
Hopefully the tips here will help tide you over until you can talk to your doctor tomorrow.

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Johanna
Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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anxietygirl123
Neophyte
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Hi there,
I just wanted to follow up on my situation just in case any girl reads this and feels the exact same way I felt. So first of all, I am currently on my second period after this pregnancy scare. Which obviously means I am not pregnant. I went to my gynecologist when I was feeling all those weird symptoms I mentioned in my first post and he proceeded with an examination. He then told me that because of all the stress I've been putting myself under, my egg had exploded during ovulation as it was too big to hold in my ovaries. All of this was due to stress and that is why I was feeling all those pregnancy like symptoms. He said there was nothing I can do except relax and wait for my next period which essentially washes away an "unused egg."
So after I got my period, I was feeling a lot better and the symptoms were gone. but then I wondered "what if it wasn't actually my period?" "what if I still might be pregnant?" Stupid questions, I know.
Now that my second period came around I feel a lot better and quite frankly, hate myself for pressuring myself so much. Anxiety is real. Very real.
Anyways, I had a talk with boyfriend about our sexual activity, about how I felt and all that. He was very understanding and we now take things slow.
For any girl reading this. If you are anxious about anything. ANYTHING not just a pregnancy scare or sex or WHATEVER, please calm down. Relax. 99% of the time it's all in your head. And you are depriving yourself of happiness that you should be feeling.
That's what I tell myself everyday now. It's all in my head. Relaxxx.
Hope this helps anyone who reads it!

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