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To answer the new addendum...body image to me has nothing to do with feeling "sexy" at all. Its about feeling healthy and in touch with my body. After hiking for miles, I'm sweaty with hair flying everywhere, and depending on the weather caked in mud. And to be honest, I really don't care. I'm happy to be out in nature. I feel great about myself that I'm able to hike for 15 miles in hard terrain with exercise induced asthma and asthma emulating allergies. I love the feeling in my lungs taking in the fresh air of the country, and the feeling of the sun pounding on my spf 45 sunblock slathered skin. Positive body image for me is more about what my body is capable of, what my body can do...not about feeling sexy in any way.
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I feel best when I'm reading great poetry, and people are really into it. Also, when I pamper myself and take a long time dancing in the mirror just smiling and complimenting myself. I might start out thinking I look like crap, but if I REALLY try, I can usually make myself feel good. I just need lots of time and lots of special pampering for myself.
Also, I'm HORRIBLE at sports. Really, I am, so when I’m playing a sport and I'm doing well, I feel SO sexy. Volleyball is the most recent success story for me. I can play that fairly well. I play with all boys too, so its very empowering to have the guys saying 'Here comes the dominance!' when you go to serve, and knowing inside that you ARE doing great. The compliments don't work unless you feel it inside already
-------------------- ~Mary
“People out there must be told about the self-loathing that follows rape and how it's the greatest breakage in divine law to mutilate themselves, as I have done.”Tori Amos Posts: 40 | From: Virginia | Registered: May 2006
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Many of you said you feel best when hiking... I'm a backpacker, but for some reason I don't have the best body image when I'm backpacking. Hiking and working out is a wonderful feeling, and I loveeee being out in nature for days, but it doesn't do anything for my image.
My most relaxing place is in the shower because it's really the only place I'm totally alone to think.
I think I have the best body image when I play in band. I know it's pretty random, but the pep band at my college is very small and I'm so comfortable around all the people that I don't care how I look. I love playing my instrument, it's so relaxing and fun. I think it's one of the few times during the week where I don't have to be self conscious.
Edit: I also do a lot of tie dying, and it makes me feel awesome when people like my stuff.
-------------------- "We have to continually be jumping off cliffs and developing our wings on the way down." -Kurt Vonnegut Posts: 15 | From: USA | Registered: May 2006
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Ooooh. I play lacrosse and that's when I feel the best. I'm a bit good at it, so I'm confident and when I walk up to the center line, getting ready to position myself for the draw (the draw is when the two opposing centers put the sticks together and, at whistle, fling the stick up and try to get the ball). I swing my lacrosse stick on my shoulder and I walk confidently to the center line, screaming words of encouragement to my team mates.
Oh man, I've never thought of this! My friend who was keeping the score board during my last game said it was so cool to watch me. He said "You looked like you were flowing, weaving in and out." Oh man did THAT feel GOOD!
When I play I can dodge people, I can twirl...It just feels so good to be in control! I also love it when I'm walking home or walking through school with my lacrosse stick in my hand and my adidas sports bag on my shoulder, wearing flip flops, jeans and a t-shirt. That's when I feel, not the sexiest, which is surprising because I would think I feel the best when I feel sexy, but I feel the most proud and cool. Oh I LOVE lacrosse!
Posts: 23 | From: USA | Registered: May 2006
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I am so fascinated how I brought up this point in my previous entry (last paragraph) without reading Miz Scarlet's post about body image and sexiness:
"That's when I feel, not the sexiest, which is surprising because I would think I feel the best when I feel sexy, but I feel the most proud and cool."
I think it has to do with when you feel the most confident. If that's when someone feels sexy, then that's it. But for me, I guess it's when I'm walking with a lacrosse stick in my hand, flip flops on my feet, and an adidas string knapsack on my shoulder - I think it's because I'm most confident with my lacrosse abilities.
How we view our bodies has to do with how comfortable we are within our skin. I realize that my percetion of my body is somewhat negative and, according to my boyfriend, distorted. (I can blame the media and my lack of confidence in my physical features). But I try to see the positives, as hard as that may be for me.
But it's when I'm playing lacrosse, or doing something confidently, that I don't worry about anything but what I'm doing. I'm rejuvinated, walking with a skip in my step, feeling proud and confident.
Our body image, to me, is how confident and comfortable we are at specific moments in time. It depends on what we consider beautiful, and that may change constantly (just like fashion). But it goes back to our own instinctive level of comfort and beauty, what we truly believe is just AWESOME. And that, as I state proudly and confidetely again, is when I'm playing lacrosse.
Posts: 23 | From: USA | Registered: May 2006
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my body image is about the function, use and visceral feel of being in my own skin
as opposed to equating "sexy" with body image.
I agree with the former. I seldom think of myself as "sexy" (that is, sexually attractive). It's not a useful concept for me, as far as I'm concerned. Instead, I think of myself as physically attractive in terms of my obvious health and fitness level.
Hallie's got a good point - it's interesting that a lot of these posts associate good body image with "masculine activity." I think that's definitely a positive response to feminist growth - we're drawing on experiences that don't pigeonhole us in traditional roles.
My best body image mooments are when horseback riding, lifting, and sometimes when I'm dressed nicely and can see that my body looks fit and proportionate in a close-fitting dress. Or when I wake up and wash my face and see myself in the mirror.
I've felt toughest when road marching in driving cold rain without any rain gear... and a lot of the male soldiers around me were complaning about the rain WHILE wearing rain gear.
Posts: 455 | From: New York, NY | Registered: Apr 2005
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I run cross country and play soccer, and after a 5 mile run or so, with (literally) my whole body drenched in sweat - (when I'm "glistening" as my fellow runners & I like to call it), when the muscles in my legs are on fire, and I can feel my lungs being filled... I'm my favorite person when I'm wearing my cleats- I feel like I can do anything. I could care less what the crowd thinks I look like- they're there to watch me play, not judge how many split ends I have or how much my clothes cost, etc.
Inspiring question, Miz Scarlet
Posts: 7 | From: strawberry fields forever | Registered: Jun 2006
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My best self-image moments are probably when I'm dancing. I love to dance, not even in a class, lol, but on my own, and I can hold my own against some trained dancers. \m/ I just love the way it allows me to move, channeling the music through myself, it just makes me happy and at peace with my body. Of course, the endorphins don't suck either.
Posts: 8 | From: Massachusetts | Registered: Jun 2006
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I totally agree with Aranel, elliebean and karybu, ballet dancing is one of the best things for a good body image. When I am dancing is one of the only times I like my body and how I look. My dance school recently closed, so now I just tend to dance around my living room. But the feeling of being graceful, elegant and powerful whilst you are pirouetting around a room is great. It is one of the best image boosts you can get. It makes you feel fabulous!
Posts: 1 | From: Bedford | Registered: Jun 2006
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I heart this thread. And I love reading these, I just gotta say.
-------------------- Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen About Me • Get our book! Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead Posts: 63418 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000
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my personal, best feeling, is when i wake up in the morning. cause im not a morning person, and i cant see well from far away, and i sleep in the nude, i look into the mirror, while im still lyin down, with my comforter still draped around me, and i see my back. i love my back, and i love to move, and watch the well defined muscles moving.
its just... i dunno... the greatest feeling, apart from dancing at school dances, and having some random guy want to dance with me cause im sexy. i dont need them to tell me, because i know i am, but i do love it when im not known as the "freaky smart girl" and people think i am pretty, and tell me, when not trying to get me to do their hmwk.
one other thing i love to do is sing, because i can feel myself be alive. i can feel the music coming out of me, and know that i sound good. i can feel my diaphram moving up, and my stomach moving out, taking in breaths, feeling the air which keeps us alive moving through my body.
alrgiht... last one, and a short one. when im meditating. because then i am just me. and my thoughts are my own. and i feel intouch w/everyone and everything.
-------------------- "Im not the next of them, I am the first of me..." -First of Me, Hoobastank Posts: 24 | From: Seattle | Registered: Jun 2006
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Do you ever have one of those days when you just feel pretty? I woke up today, had no horendous zits that weren't there the night before, and the one I did have is nearly gone now, and decided to smile before I pulled the covers off my head. It was one of those days when you wake up a few minutes before your alarm goes off, and you're actually HAPPY, because you're awake, not still sleepy, and you didn't get woken up by a very rude beeeeep.
I didn't shave my legs, or my armpits (a usual thing for me sunday mornings... I take a bath and shave. I feel girly and refreshed for the week) because I lost my razor last week in the post-moving chaos of college. I'm starting to embrace my armpit hair, but not enough to keep it around once I get through the piles of belongings in my room. But it was nice to do something different.
And then, I got out of the shower, put on one of my favorite "cute" outfits, and then decided it was more of a t-shirt day. I LOVE tees. It's kinda a problem, and my mom laughs at me for it (mostly because we own a few too many of the same tees... not on purpose, it's kinda creepy but fun). Anyways, I put on a green one. Green is my fave color to wear because it makes my eyes look a bit more green, not that I don't love the blue.
And it was a day for pigtails. I love pigtails. They just make me smile every time I shake my head and they hit my face.
And to make it even better, I was talking to Andrew a couple hours ago (he's at his parents' this week), and he asked me if I would wear the same green shirt I'm wearing - because they bring out my eyes, and put my hair in pigtails - because they make me look happier and cute, this weekend when I see him. Talk about feeling pretty and being called pretty over the phone.
And I love my body. When I'm doing anything and everything. Sometimes I feel like people must think I'm crazy for loving my red hair and freckles, but they make me ME! And I love it. I love being me. I'm so thankful for a *mostly* healthy, functioning, amazing body!
quote:Originally posted by kathe: I feel beautiful when I have art supplies covering my fingers and smudged on my nose, when I am covered in sweat and distributing goods to hurricane victims in New Orleans, when the victims come up to me and say "god bless you" and "I just don't know what I would do without you" with tears in their eyes, when I get the right answer on an obscure question in Trivial Pursuit, when I prove my point in a political debate, when I wear a dress that swishes just right as I dance to imaginary music, when I am asked for an answer because I "know everything", when I prove the teacher wrong, when I walk into my psychiatrist's office for the first time wearing a crown and radish earrings, when I blow new acquaintances minds because they can't believe I'm really that young, when I put on a killer outfit just to hang around the house in, when I dance naked to bubbly music late at night all by myself, and on days when I just feel special.
I know exactly what you mean! Heehee, you sound like a fun person.
-------------------- Life isn't meant to be easy; it's meant to be worth it. Posts: 7 | From: California | Registered: Jun 2006
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When I'm dancing around my house, running around like a complete goofy fool, I feel so silly and gleeful and graceful . And my dad smiles at me and tells me he loves watching me dance because I look so happy.
Sometimes when I come out of the shower, I look at myself in the mirror and wrap the towel around myself as if I'm a marble statue from the Renaissance. I don't have a perfect body; I have acne on my face and back and a little cellulite on my white bum (think the Coppertone Girl white), but I drape the towel around myself and turn to look in the mirror, and I feel beautiful.
When I'm in the car, singing loudly to myself and just feeling in the groove.
-------------------- Life isn't meant to be easy; it's meant to be worth it. Posts: 7 | From: California | Registered: Jun 2006
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Hmmm. For me, body image is occasionally about being sexy, but mostly it's about being alive. I have great moments... -when I'm driving and one of my favorite songs come on, and I roll the windows down, hit the accelerator a little harder, and belt it out like there's no tomorrow -when I've been working in my tiny herb garden and I smell like thyme and rosemary and basil and fresh earth -after I watch or participate in a great musical/play/concert/etc. -when I wear my mid-length skirts and walk down stairs, they billow out in front of me (a bit of fun: wearing my new black tiered skirt last week, I rather giddly told my friend that I looked like "a floaty wave of death" going down her stairs... )
Most of all, though, is being out for the birth and life of a storm, being whipped by wind and dancing in the torrents of rain... I feel like I'm part of that awesome power, and I'm radiating energy... so amazing.
-------------------- "Cut her down." "She is a witch!" "But she's our witch. Cut her down." Posts: 174 | From: Indiana, USA | Registered: Jun 2006
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(Okay, save that the topic wasn't self-image, it was expressly about BODY image: which also is not just about beauty, either. Enjoying being in our own skin, physical purusits or the matter doesn't mean no one is dismissing their brains or their smarts, or that enjoying being in one's own skin is about having "nice legs." I don't see a need to derail threads that are of value to others, okay? I think we have a few here about goals and achievements that ARE expressly intellectual and not physical, so if those are the issues you want to address, by all means, find those threads and add in.)
-------------------- Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen About Me • Get our book! Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead Posts: 63418 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000
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I'm kinda glad this thread got bumped - I hadn't seen it before and it's really, really inspiring. If I may add to it?
My best body-image moments: - Catching an unexpected glimpse of myself in a mirror and noticing that I'm actually kind of pretty. - Swing dancing! Swing dancing, five million times over. I feel ridiculously sexy when I'm dancing. Especially when I do aerials (when the guy tosses the girl in the air or lifts her up), because it makes me feel really light, and honestly? Flying through the air or being hoisted off my feet is a spectacular feeling. - Working out. I've become newly committed to it and the feeling I get after working up a great sweat and lifting weights for a bit is terrific. Hooray endorphins! - Actually, not just swing dancing. Dancing in any form! Silly dancing, spinning, attempting to waltz and failing miserably, grinding occasionally, just all kinds of dancing make me feel amazing about myself.
-------------------- So if you care to find me Look to the western sky As someone told me lately Everyone deserves the chance to fly Posts: 365 | From: DC | Registered: Aug 2006
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best body image moments, in order from most frequently occurring to a one-time thing --
4. finishing an exam/passing in a paper (props to my brain and my tired, tired fingers)
3. laughing like crazy with my friends
2. cuddling on a couch, by myself or with someone else, but DEFINITELY wearing comfy socks
1. my all-time best body image moment occurred at the top of Half Dome in Yosemite. When I went to Yosemite with my friends, they failed to mention that we would be climbing 18 miles in a day. It turned out to be an incredible experience though, and a beautiful day. When I hauled myself up those last few vertical steps...happiness ensued.
Funny--on the weekends I get dressed up to go out with friends, but the moments when I'm in party gear don't even come close to my four best. I can only conclude that my best body image moments come not when I try to measure up to societal standards of sex appeal (ie wearing eyeliner and low-cut dresses), but when I feel, like a lot of the rest of you, completely comfortable in my own skin. That comfortable feeling is my preferred brand of of sexy though, because it usually results from the things I mentioned--a good laugh or cuddle, a feeling of accomplishment, or a fantastic workout (sexual or otherwise). Feeling well rested definitely helps too.
Plus, eyeliner irritates my contact lenses and low-cut dresses leave way too much skin exposed--I get coooold. Guess non-conformist sexy is the only way for me.
Posts: 87 | From: bay area & new england | Registered: Apr 2001
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When I don't have my contacts in and can't see my reflection... hahahaha
Posts: 18 | From: kazakhstan....ok not really. | Registered: Sep 2006
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I had a great moment at the gym today where I was totally reveling in making my body work, smiling at the guys and gals I was swapping machines with, joking around with my family that I didn't even notice or care I hadn't shaved my pits in over a week and was sporting some pretty bodacious hair for all the world to see. When I finally did remember, I laughed and told my mom because we both agreed that my confidence was so high from my workout, no one had even noticed. It was AWESOME.
-------------------- Unlucky at cards; lucky at love. Posts: 1679 | From: London, ON | Registered: Jan 2003
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-------------------- "Cut her down." "She is a witch!" "But she's our witch. Cut her down." Posts: 174 | From: Indiana, USA | Registered: Jun 2006
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Oh, I've got another one too!! - Rock climbing! Just started up again, and when you finish a route without cheating or falling, it's such a great feeling. And when your body starts getting exhausted, and you can't even haul your butt up an easy route you know you should be able to do, that's when you know you've gotten in a fantastic workout. Plus, when I'm climbing and there's a hard move, I tend to be a screamer: I just let out these grunts/yells/growls/whatever you want to call them, from deep down inside, as I go for the next handhold. It makes me feel like my body is so powerful.
-------------------- So if you care to find me Look to the western sky As someone told me lately Everyone deserves the chance to fly Posts: 365 | From: DC | Registered: Aug 2006
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My best body image moment? At a show. In the mosh pit, when the only thing keeping you going is pure adrenaline, because it doesn't matter if I nearly got trampled back there--three people helped me back up and shoved me back in. It's the pounding of the music and the collective violence of shoulders getting shoved into noses, and elbows in eye-sockets. It doesn't matter if I'm a 5'7" girl with hips too big and breasts too small slamming against guys who are at least six-one and twice as broad as I am. There's this sense of community that I can only get from the pit; like we're all the same, and we all can't feel our limbs afterward...It makes me feel accepted. Like I'm not alone.
And I find that after the show I really don't care how I'm standing, or how sweaty and exhausted I am, because whatever I do then is the sexiest thing I have ever done. The injuries sustained are medals of Honor just because I had the time of my life.
My boyfriend doesn't like this, he worries too much (of course, it's okay for him to do it). But that doesn't matter either, because at the end of the night I've managed to emasculate at least five of the sexist Metal Heads in the crowd, simply by having a good time.
-------------------- If I ever asked her to Skank, she'd probably think I called her one. Posts: 34 | From: North Carolina | Registered: Aug 2006
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Oh, Frogmite, that so perfectly describes my experiences with moshing. It's the best thing ever. In fact, when talking about the last show I went to with some friends, I compared it to having sex. I really love concerts as much for getting close to the band as for the experience I have in the mosh pit.
-------------------- -joey Scarleteen Volunteer
"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand Posts: 8424 | From: Cologne, Germany | Registered: Sep 2005
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Ha! And you just described what got me through some of the worst moments of my high school years in the early and mid 80's.
I also remember having really good feelings in the pit about gender: per not feeing gendered there like I did in other spaces.
I'm so glad to hear all that is still happening for some folks (even if it's metal instead pf punk)!
-------------------- Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen About Me • Get our book! Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead Posts: 63418 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000
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Well, metal shows were the only thing we ever got where I went to high school, so there wasn't much choice (heaven forbid a punk/ska band show up around there, for that matter, heaven forbid a girl show up in the pit!). The place we all frequented (the only all ages club in the area), though, ended up banning mosh pits for some reason...On some level, I think it might've been because of me, which is disappointing to no end.
-------------------- If I ever asked her to Skank, she'd probably think I called her one. Posts: 34 | From: North Carolina | Registered: Aug 2006
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My best body moments? They come so randomly, but....
- I was a barista for abut 9 months last year, and when I was on a roll, doing a 7-drink order all at once, with latte art and flavours and pretty little add-ons that the customers didn't ask for but got anyway, I felt awesome. The customers would rave about the quality of my drinks and I just felt like such a boho-artist!
- I'm a makeup hound; it comes from the theatrical background. Sometimes it'll be 10:30 pm and I'll be feeling so blah, and I'll put on the New Pornographers, this amazing Canadian band that I adore, and put on a pretty outfit and do a full makeup--foundation, powder, blush, mascara, shadow, everything. Looking so incredibly fabulous at such a random time always perks me up!
- Sometimes I'll spin off a totally random fact or outlandish conspiracy theory, and my boyfriend will look at me and go, "you are so cute." Most people will just give me a strange look when I tell them why hot sauce is actually good for your health, but the fact that he finds my intelligence an essential part of my charm always makes me glow.
-------------------- The Divine Miss Shade Posts: 15 | From: Canada | Registered: Oct 2007
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For me, probably a week or so ago when I was auditioning for Mark Anthony in my college production of Julius Caesar. I didn't get the part, but everyone told me I was really good - and I felt for the first time that I was a really good actor.
-------------------- “In a strange room, before you are emptied for sleep, what are you. And when you are filled with sleep you never were. I don’t know what I am. I don’t know if I am or not... how often have I lain beneath rain on a strange roof, thinking of home.” Posts: 1269 | From: London, UK | Registered: Jun 2006
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Oh, and I just had another one that I'm so very proud about: walking out of the doctor's office with a brand new prescription for birth control made me feel so incredibly empowered! I felt like I was taking care of my body and my soul, protecting myself and allowing myself to have fun. Fantastic feeling.
-------------------- The Divine Miss Shade Posts: 15 | From: Canada | Registered: Oct 2007
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Pretty much any time I'm wearing a shirt with the sleeves rolled up. I'm not exactly the strongest guy in the neighborhood, but wearing a button-up shirt with the sleeves rolled up makes me feel like I could lift a semi.
Also, anything that demonstrates my balance. When I bussed tables for a restaurant, it felt great to be able to haul 20 half-full actual-glass glasses into the kitchen at once, due to an intricate system of stacking and counterbalancing. Climbing trees, sliding down railings, bracing myself in a doorframe or across a stairwell - all have the same effect.
Finally, yeah, metal does it too. Turning the amp to 11, picking up my bass guitar (despite the fact that I am awful!), and pounding out Iron Man - that's power.
Posts: 16 | From: USA | Registered: Oct 2007
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oh, Miss Shade, i so totally agree with you on two things, i'm a barista, and it just feels so awesome when you are kicking arse making coffee, super quick, super quality and awesome patterns.
and the new pornographers! love them to bits.
Posts: 76 | From: Australia | Registered: Jul 2006
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Belly dancing! I love how nobody cares what shape you are, or even if you're particularly good at it or not. It just feels so good, and I always feel beautiful and energetic, both during and after.
Plus, since it really is good exercise, I know I'm also doing something healthy.
Also sparring, especially with someone bigger or higher-ranking than I am. Even if I get run all over the dojo and end up with my back to a corner, it still makes me feel ten feet tall (so, approximately twice my actual height )
Posts: 147 | From: USA | Registered: Jul 2007
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moshing is when you lose control, don't think of your life, problems, or ANYTHING at that moment in time, and it can last hours. all it is, is sweat, blood, dancing, and multiple faces blurring past your vision, making new friends, "oh hey, I saw you at that one show in the pit"
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I feel best when I'm working with horses. When I'm doing the hard labor that comes with taking care of them, I feel strong and in shape and I love that feeling...it makes me forget about my looks and more about my fitness. And when I'm at a show, I'm always concentrating more on showing and training than I am about how I look; however, I also have a lot of confidence in my skills, which makes me feel good overall and better about my body image in general.
When do I feel good about my body? - when im walking/jogging to work or the shops or anywhere really. Because it means i have a fit and useful body that gets me places. And I dont need no polluting car! - when im working with a great team at hospital towards a common goal and we're in a group laughing and talking together. when i feel part of something bigger than myself. - when i use my hands and arms and my strength (although i'm puny!) to support people. when i comfort a patient. when i touch someone and connect wih them.
Its got nothing to do with feeling sexy for me. If anything, sexiness scares me. it makes me too vulnerable and not in control.
Posts: 1323 | Registered: Nov 2007
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in the shower cos i feel like a mermaid! and when i played the witch in the panto cos i got to cover myself in green. a mask of clear green skin is just the thing to make you feel rawr
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I've noticed that generally, I feel the best about my body during piano performances. I can remember one in particular where I just felt totally at ease and happy with my body. It was an all-Chopin recital that was kind of a big deal. I had to audition to play in it, and I was one of the youngest people there. I think I was about 15, and it was something that was mostly aimed at university music majors, so just the fact that I was selected to play at all gave me a lot of confidence in being there. I was wearing a simple, but very elegant and formal black velvet dress, and my hair and makeup was all pristine and pretty. When I was walking onto the stage to play, I just felt...good. I felt beautiful. I felt confident in both how I looked and in my abilities as a pianist. I felt graceful and sexy as I walked to the piano. When I sat down, I thought my hands looked beautiful against the keyboard. Now, I usually hate my hands. They're extremely small, which as a pianist, has always put me at a huge disadvantage. But that night, I just felt like I had command of every part of my mind and body, and that feeling of control and power and confidence felt so amazing. It was also probably one of the best performances of my life. So many people came up to me after the recital and complimented me not just on my playing, but also on my performance poise and presense, and that was really just the icing on the cake. It's important to feel good about yourself independent of those around you, but it's always nice when you know that the people around you noticed how amazing you were, y'know?
Another slightly less powerful, but more recent (and more simple) moment was when I was shopping for prom dresses with my mom. Now, I hadn't even been planning to go to prom, but a friend had unexpectedly asked me to go with him, so I figured hey, why not. I've also kind of always struggled with some body image issues. It's not that I think I'm hideous...it's just that I'm not really conventionally beautiful. I'm not fat, but I'm certainly not thin. I'm curvy. I have hips and boobs and a good-sized rear-end. It doesn't always bother me, but finding formal dresses that both fit me and flatter me can be a bit of a challange. I also have struggled with some gender-identity issues, so I have always had kinf of mixed feeling about wearing dresses in general. But anyway, my mom and I were shopping, and we'd been to about three or four stores and I'd probably tried on dozens of dresses, and nothing really worked. We were running out of time and in our last store for the day, and I'd found a rather unique black-and-white gown. When I tried it on, it was just...perfect. It hugged me in all the right places and was more forgiving in the places I didn't want accentuated.It seriously fit like it was made for me, and I just felt...really, really pretty, and feminine, and happy about being pretty and feminine, which is not a feeling I ever get. It was nice.
-------------------- "America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between." -Oscar Wilde Posts: 115 | From: San Francisco, CA | Registered: Nov 2007
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I feel best about my body when I'm with my boyfriend.
I've never had the best self image, and there are always a lot of things that I think I can improve. Before he comes over I'll run around frantically trying to find the right shirt the right pants the right hairstyle the right makeup, but as soon as he is with me, any self-conscious thought I had goes away immediately.
Under his hands, my tummy doesn't feel quite so big, nor do my thighs and hips and butt. And he looks at me with such amazing love and desire that I can't be self-conscious anymore. I feel like the only girl in his world who matters.
It's amazed me before how content I am to be naked with him, given all of my body issues. I won't even let my mom see me half-dressed when I'm trying on clothes.
Posts: 25 | From: VA | Registered: Oct 2007
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For about the past month, I've been doing a lot more physical activity in a predominantly male environment.
I'm definitely one of if not the weakest person there- but realizing that, while I'm still struggling while trying to use a large circular saw or haul a heavy tool box around, that I'm growing muscles and getting stronger because of it is an amazing feeling. I've recently been having some awesome, "hey, I didn't know I could look like or do this!" moments.
-------------------- I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be. -Douglas Adams.
quote:Originally posted by libertatissacra: It's important to feel good about yourself independent of those around you, but it's always nice when you know that the people around you noticed how amazing you were, y'know?
I do know. I was having an amazing day skiing -- I felt fabulous. My body was doing exactly what I wanted it to do and I could feel how the individual parts were working together. I was actually thinking about how incredible my body is, that it's capable of doing something like that.
If that weren't enough, someone who has gone out of the way to help my technique told me I looked just as good as I felt.
-------------------- “I would have girls regard themselves not as adjectives but as nouns.” --Elizabeth Cady Stanton Posts: 3641 | From: Truckee, CA, US | Registered: Sep 2001
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It's high time this thread got some more replies! (It's been fantastic reading it through so far.)
Cycling, when I'm cycling up a hill, to then go down a hill - the contrast between really putting in the effort, feeling my muscles tired and aching, to the release as the bike carries me. I love that. I also really enjoy cycling when there's a really big queue of traffic (as there often is) - makes me so happy to know how wonderful cycling is for my mind and body. Sometimes I think about putting leaflets under windscreenwipers, asking why people can't get a bike, or just try.
Baking (or cooking in general?), just by myself, probably with some music on, on a really sunny day, being able to hear children down the road laughing in their garden. I love the way my hands can move in so many different ways - to chop, clean, slice ingredients, to knead dough, to crumble material... I like being able to provide my own food, not realiant on other people to cook for me.
I really like babysitting, when I'm playing a board game, or just chatting with children. I love the way children don't shy from being affectionate, and how we can laugh so often about absolutely nothing, and sometimes just laughing because the other person started laughing... It's really great to be able to do that.
I really enjoy waking up in the morning, stretching slowly, the way my feet tingle as I first step on the carpet, the way my hair is so messy and unrestrained, the cosyness of my bed and being comfortable in it.
I also swimming underwater, plunging deeper and deeper, knowing my lungs are able to cope with that for a while, and how strong my body feels.
(Need to go swimming more... and cycle more...hmmm)
Posts: 79 | From: England | Registered: Dec 2007
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I have two, when i am riding my horse in the ring or out on trail i feel tall and lean, and that I have amazing posture. (I am only 5'1!!) So I feel tall (obviously) and superior on the back of a horse. Also, when I am just being myself I feel most attractive because I don't need to feel like I have to be ashamed of anything and that's always great
Posts: 10 | From: New York | Registered: Jan 2008
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cool thread! ---------------- I think the dichotomy is not necessary. To me, body image includes feeling sexy, healthy, confident, intelligent, free, happy, proud, cool, and more. ---------------- I love how my body feels when I take care of it (something I need to work on). I've been exercising since I was 13 off and on. I love when I've been working out for a while and my body starts aching and toning up. ---------------- I like those rare times when I eat healthy and the inside of my body screams with joy. I feel cleansed. ---------------- I felt such confident when I learned that I was naturally good at martial arts, especially since I'm not an athlete. I went to a few classes over my lifetime and the teachers always say that I learn quickly and have a great kick. --------------- Intellectually, I am very proud when people complement my speaking or writing, especially since I consider those my weaknesses. --------------- Crying...I feel in tune with my body after crying. It's something about feeling connected to your emotions and your body at the same time. --------------- Most frequently, I feel sexy when I listen to music. I daydream a lot when listening to my ipod - Sometimes I'm on stage dancing away, other times I'm dancing with a cute fantasy girl. So fun! --------------- When I wake up and am happy with some part of my body. From my glowing skin to the curves of my body to my gorgeous and big breasts. --------------- When I buy new clotes and try them on (model them in front of the mirror). I love putting on clothes that show off my body and make me look sexy. And it's fun. --------------- Speaking of sexy, I feel happy with my physical body when touching myself. feeling your body is such a turn on. --------------- Finally, my best body image moments are when I smell the scent of my punani, my "heavenly blossom." I'm amazed at how wonderful my scent is now. I literally get intoxicated off of my smell. I say, "Damn T***, you smell delicious!" and "owww, I'm sexy." Sometimes, I just want to lay down and smell myself all day. Sometimes, I do. I've never fully enjoyed my womanhood until now. I luv it.
-------------------- ============================ A journey of a thousand miles starts with one step Posts: 5 | From: Lexington, Ky | Registered: Jan 2008
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I feel the best about myself when I make someone laugh. I don't have to worry about how my hair looks, or whether my bra strap is showing, all the other person (or people) sees is my sense of humour.
When I'm playing music, too. I play flute and cello, and I'm either running along with the music or hanging on for dear life trying to keep up with it. I feel great either way.
posted
I love when I've just gotten out of a shower and my muscles are all relaxed from the warm water and my hair sticks to my face and I just feel clean and fresh and ready to take whatever messes life gives me. The feeling of renewal makes me feel great about my body.
Posts: 19 | Registered: Aug 2011
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I think my best image moment was my prom night, four years ago. I had the perfect dress - I'm a big girl, tend to dress fairly butch, and hate skirts, so I'd dreaded the idea of dress shopping, but the first shop we'd been to had one which suited me down to the ground and was on sale. It actually needed to be taken in quite a lot, as it was the last of a line and it was really big. I had a new haircut which I wasn't entirely sure about but which turned out perfect with the dress, and I actually had makeup on, which I never do normally. I walked into the prom, and at the bar I ran into the guy who'd bullied me on the school bus for a couple of years, and maybe it's mean of me but I have to admit the expression of shock on his face at seeing me dolled up made the entire night for me. I bought him a drink and went off to enjoy the rest of the event, which was generally awesome
More generally and recently, dancing at the goth nights at the uni club. I don't like most dance clubs, but this one is great. I feel part of the crowd instead of feeling lost in it, and I can sing along as loudly and badly as I like without anyone caring because everyone else is doing the same.
Posts: 424 | From: UK | Registered: Jan 2007
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when i'm dancing. i dance alone in my room at night with the lights out. i gave up dance when i was 12 but i feel best in the moonlight dancing in secret
Posts: 94 | From: london | Registered: Apr 2007
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And I love it. I love being me. I'm so thankful for a *mostly* healthy, functioning, amazing body!![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
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. And my dad smiles at me and tells me he loves watching me dance because I look so happy.
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