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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Abuse & Assault » Part II about my best friend

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Author Topic: Part II about my best friend
Ste-Funnie
Activist
Member # 50934

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So when I said in my last post that my best friend was abused by his ex, and his other friends didn't believe him, well, he also told me that he showed his friends the facebook messages between him and his ex that proved that he was abused. I haven't seen the messages, but I do believe him. Even though I believe him, I wanna see this messages anyway, not to get proof that he was abused, but just to see what he said. I just wanna take a peek. I'm so nervous to ask him, b/c he might get mad at me, or think that I don't believe him (even if I say the reason I just said). I do believe him. I just wanna take a little peek at it. Nothing too big. I just donno how to ask him without upsetting him or making him think I don't believe him. Him saying "no" isn't a big thing, but I don't wanna upset him.

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Sounds to me like the most respectful thing to do around that is figure that if he wants to share those with you, he will. And if he doesn't offer, you accept that's just a curiosity of yours that's not going to get sated.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ste-Funnie
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Yeah but, how do you think can be a respectful way to ask?

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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I don't really think there is one. I think the respectful thing to do is NOT to ask.

You might bear in mind that it may be that he showed those other folks and not you because of a good thing: because he felt the need to prove abuse to others while he felt confident that you believed him.

But seriously, I'd let it go. You don't need to see them, and we don't always have to have our curiosities sated.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ste-Funnie
Activist
Member # 50934

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if ya say so.

--------------------
~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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