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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Abuse & Assault » "forgetting" abuse?

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Author Topic: "forgetting" abuse?
jennamonroe18
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Member # 47443

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i'm just wondering if it's possible to completely forget the act of actual sexual abuse, especially if you were very young when it happened.

i have a lot of weird memories from about age 5-6 on... i distinctly remember one time my underwear were completely covered in blood, and my mom was shocked. i know i was embarassed, and i told her it was probably just mud or something. i remember taking baths and the soap stinging something "down there" so badly, like it was cut (that happened quite a few times). i always masterbated a lot, and i remember playing "doctor" with my neighbor, even going so far as putting his penis in my mouth. we lived in another city for a while and commuted back and forth to another house in the country, and i was always terrified of the country house for a reason i can't remember.

my dad used to be a social worker, and so i've always heard about signs of sexual abuse in children, but i never really thought about it until now. i've recently become sexually active and sometimes things just freak me out for reasons i'm not sure of. i know this is a really weird, tmi, off the wall question, but is it possible that i have been sexually abused and forgotten it happening?

Posts: 1 | From: idaho | Registered: Jun 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
atm1
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 37835

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It is entirely possible to not remember sexual abuse that occurred at a young age.

Since things seem to be bothering you about it, you can ask your parents what they remember.

You can also explore therapy to deal with the sexual activities that you're uncomfortable with--that does not necessarily have to involve trying to uncover any memories, though it can.

What do *you* think you need going forward?

Posts: 2262 | From: in transition | Registered: Apr 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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