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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Abuse & Assault » Really bad situation HELP

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Author Topic: Really bad situation HELP
Member # 41555

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Okay well i once again attempted to dump my boyfriend of 2 years who has verbally and emotionally abused me weekly, in fact he said alot of horrible things to me on the phone last night. It went along the lines of , "your worthless, there is no point to you living, your ugly, you should kill yourself nobody will want you" and swearing his head off. Well after me ignoring him, and then having the guts to tell him we need to break up, he finds out his sick grandmother dies. Right after i dump him. So now its like everything is turned around, his grandmother lived in another country and ive never met her but he hasnt seen her in years, she was sick and we knew it was coming but i still feel sorry and understand why hes sad. But now HE is the one telling me to leave him alone, and that he will nver find anyone and how sad he is that she passed. I told him il be here for him if he wants to talk about it, i was very sincere i thought, but now its like the whol situation is switched around and i feel like hes waiting for me to ask to see him and comfort him (which i most likely will do) and forget about all the abuse he has put me through, i dont know what to do and what is the right thing. I told him im here for him, but i still want to run away from him! advice??
Posts: 23 | From: us | Registered: Dec 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Why are you still there for him?

I know that's very direct, but per how to get away from an abuser and cease an abusive relationship, the thing is, you can't still "be there." You really do just have to get gone.

You left: it's about time, and GREAT for you. Now the next step is to stop answering the calls, sticking around in some way to still be abused and manipulated. And by all means, don't con tact him yourself.

Do you need us to show you a bunch of links again about the way to end these kinds of relationships? If so, just let us know. I'd be happy to compile them again.

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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