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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Abuse & Assault » internet dating.

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Author Topic: internet dating.
Member # 36364

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My boyfriend and I have been hanging out since September. I haven't gotten the chance to meet his mom yet and my mom is thinking it's really weird, save the fact my boyfriend and I are both adults (19 & 22). His mom works during the week and spends time with his grandmother during the weekends and we just haven't had a good opportunity. How bad is it that I haven't gotten to meet his mom yet? I told my mom that she needs to butt out of my personal life (this is the first time I've told her this) as I am an adult now and she needs to "cut the umbilical cord" sooner or later. I hate how damn nosy she is.

Actually, the real reason I am so defensive with her is because I met him online back in June and since meeting him in person, I have seen a tumultuous, emotional side of him and her constant persistence keeps me worrying.

Should I actually think he's weird because I haven't met his mom? Sometimes I just want to get out of the relationship because I hate the fact we basically had to lie to be together. He also gets very emotional and that's another reason I just want to end it sometimes. I guess I'm afraid he'll kill himself.

Do you think it's ridiculous I haven't met his mom yet? Do you think that, since I met him online, he's destined to be a creep?

Posts: 12 | From: USA | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 25983

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We actually have an article on this very subject you'd probably like to read:

Getting Real: Relationships on the Net

I'm concerned not so much by the not-meeting-family part, but more so that you state you had to "lie" to be together, and that you've seen a part of his personality that he perhaps concealed. Would you like to talk a bit more about that?

In general, the Internet is a good way to meet people, but not a good place to date. Once you meet someone, just because you got to know them over the computer doesn't mean you made a shortcut and are ahead; that was one carefully controlled, rewritten, and rethought-and-sent part of them, and you still have to get to know them to decide if something's there. Some folks forget this, and it can have disappointing results.

Posts: 4636 | From: USA/Northern Europe | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Member # 26516

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I'd just like to add, why are you afraid that he'll kill himself? Has he threatened to do that if you leave him?

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Posts: 1345 | From: Canada | Registered: Dec 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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