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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Parents not accepting

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Author Topic: Parents not accepting
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I'm in a wonderful loving relationship with a guy that I love. He is nice, caring, and would do anything to make me happy. His friends and family like me too, to the point where they threatened him that if he did something to hurt me, to make me want to end the relationship, they would go after him. We both feel like we are meant to be with each other. But my parents (mom) can't accept that I'm with someone colored. They talk about him and his family behind his back though they've never met his family and barely know him. I try to change their attitudes when they say things that are incorrect about him and his family but I can't change their minds. Both my boyfriend and I are at the end of our rope to the point where on a rare occasion consider breaking up to just end the criticisim but we don't want to end the relationship and probably never will. He was the one that saved me, literally. I have attempted suicide multiple times, he was the one that stopped me, either by just talking to me or coming over. Once I was minutes from death, I ODed on my anti-anxiety meds and alcohol. I left a final text for him, a goodbye text. He tried to reach me but I turned my phone off so he called a friend who called an ambulance. He also helped me finish the last semester of school when I was depressed and going through anorexia. He made sure I ate something,went to class and did my work. Without him, I would have failed out of school. He is such a great boyfriend why can't they see that?

[ 07-28-2012, 12:30 AM: Message edited by: bookwormfairy ]


Posts: 263 | From: Pennsylvania | Registered: Sep 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Hey, bookwormfairy. Sorry to hear that your parents are giving you such a hard time over this relationship. At the moment, are you living at home? If so, are you considering the possibility of living apart from your parents? Do you think that would help in terms of putting some distance between your personal life and them?

Unfortunately we cannot change the mindsets of other people, but we can let them know how their words and attitudes impact us. Have you spoken to your parents at all about how deeply hurt you feel when they criticize your boyfriend and his family? Perhaps they will back off if they made aware of how their words are affecting YOU. I don't think that they are intentionally trying to hurt you. They just need to know that you are very much affected by the unkind words that they say.

Best of wishes to you!

"Sneak away, sneak away / If the fate is too sad / You are not a flower of hell / That kind of place... / Don't become lost, don't become lost... / Or you won't be able to grasp the entangled hand / The cry also has a limit...." - Naraku no Hana

Posts: 537 | From: Toronto, Canada | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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