ok.... there is this boy we have known each other for years about 6-7 years we live in the same area.. but we just used to chat like hello you ok, and that was it. he had a girlfriend they were together for bout 3 years and a half, and i had a boyfriend for a year and a half, so we both been in long relationship ( we kind of the same) his girlfriend was his 1st relationship and the first girl he had sex with, same with me my ex was my 1st boyfriend and the person i lost my virginity to. they split up in December and me and my ex broke up in February - March. me and jay started talking in April and he just started flirting with me, we both went to the same party on night and he kept commin to me and hugging me, at the end of the night we ended up kissing and he walked me home, then he told my ex as they talk now and then and jay thought i regretted it. me and jay carried on talking and we kept seeing each other around and talking though text. one night i went to his house and we started kissing so it ended up with oral sex. then he walked me home as usual and we chatted normal. Jay could tell that i liked him, like everyboy can, we kept goin on and talkin and he kept teasin me he used to talk to my mates but leave me out. then hug other girls and just say bye to me. this shows he also likes me and the way we have like our little eye looks. we was gettin on really well for bout 2-3weeks everything was fine chattin and flirtin daily, then one they my mate asked him bout me, and he said he likes me but he doesnt want a relationship his not ready he still in love with his ex mabey in the future. then after about 2 weeks i bet to his again and we had sex... it just happend, he was drunk. but then wen i got home he text me and asked me if i regreted it and i said no, he also told him that im the 2nd girl he has splet with. and then yesturday my mate talk to him and she said 'i heard what happend the other night' it was just them to. he said 'oh, so she told u, yea we had sex!, she said ' so u must like her if you had sex with her' and he said ' well im a boy.... and walked away. today i couldnt take it anymore so i told him how it is. i told him i liked him and i wasnt sure if we was both on the same page and he said that he thinks im nice but he cant be doin nothing. if i want to do a little thing with him thats fine but.. nothing else so i said im not an idiot he can use when he is horney so... and he said ok i understand ur gettin hurt so lets just leave it and be firends, then i told him i understand that he still loves his ex so its ok and he said he will always love his ex but he dnt wanna get hurt again and he dont wanna put his heart on the line again he cant risk it... but after i thought to my self and i know that this is not over. he drinks every day he really misses her but i mean im the 2nd girl his slept with and after his ex aswell so there must be something there, we have our little jokes and flirts that shows he like me but i think his scared to admit it or to put his heart at risk. both of us know its not over we both know that we will probably sleep with eachother again... but i dont want to fall for him more... i dnt know what to do? does this guy like me? or is he just messin wiht my head... shell i wait and see what happends "go with the flo" or leave him and try move on? i like him alot but i dont know how long he will take to move on and i dont know how to make him move on faster. what do i do? someone plz help me!!
-------------------- Timeea Posts: 51 | From: United Kingdom | Registered: Feb 2011
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Firstly, I don't mean this as an insult, but maybe you should work on your grammar, as it's easier to understand if it's correct.
Secondly, as a third party hearing your side of the story, I would take the time to assess the entire situation. In my opinion texting him is fine. But going over to his house and just abruptly having oral sex with him? Not so much.
If he says he is still in love with his ex ( and if she was his first girlfriend, there is always going to be a special place in ones heart for a first love; there will be fear for getting hurt again, etc ) it honestly does take a lot of time to get over someone like that.
Seeing that the time frame you give is relatively short, I think things went too fast. But if that's your type of speed for this type of relationship, then have at it. But saying that he loved his ex, waiting two weeks and having sex with him, most likely did not change that fact. we're you aware that he was drunk during it, and we're you comfortable with that? Or did you take advantage of the situation because you like him that much?
From personal experience, it sounds like this guy is just messing with your head. I think due to the fact that He knows that you like him, he takes advantage of you. I think you should find someone else because you deserve better. And forgive me if I have my facts wrong, I'm just going with the info that you gave me.
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