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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » So I slept with one of my brother's best mates...

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Author Topic: So I slept with one of my brother's best mates...
Member # 76266

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I've run into a bit of a problem and could do with some advice. I'm not exactly proud of this situation but I do think I'm not the first in line to make it appear worse than it actually is.

So to give this some context first of all, my brother (18) and I (21) are very good friends and have been so since roughly my early teenage years. He is in a steady relationship with a lovely young woman who is also a good friend of mine. I myself have been on and off with this girl and while weíre very close, weíre not officially an item. About a week ago my brother had a house party to celebrate the fact that he had recently turned 18, in which a myriad of his friends, a few of whom given our friendship are also mine, came round to help him celebrate. I turned up later, after work, with the intention of having a few beers with them before getting an early night for work the following morning.

Well, my brother has this friend, who is 17, who he has known since he started college at the start of the academic year in 2011. Iíve recently finished my 2nd year at University. Given our relationship, he naturally spent hours talking about me to her. Iím something of a grafter and have spent very little time at home so I can focus on my degree. In short, it was the first time I met her. And yeah, we hit it off pretty quickly and ended up in bed that evening. It was good sex and we both enjoyed it. Nothing dodgy there. We then spent the next few hours until around 5 am just talking about random stuff, from the triangle shaped relationship she, my brother and I held, to philosophy and sex before finally falling asleep. In short, it was really relaxed and quite lovely. We agreed to keep it quiet about our encounter. This was namely because she has a boyfriend with whom, as far as I can understand it, she is on rocky grounds with. (I think she ideally wants to leave him but I donít know.)

Anyway, things now get problematic. She and I both knew my brother would have flipped out had he known about this (he believes I have a reputation based on my two years, so far, at University Ė not exactly a myth but I digress.) Anyway, he did flip out the following afternoon after I returned from work as did my Mom (although what gives her any right to intervene at all is beyond me, and I hope beyond any rational member of society.) After building a story in which she passed out in my bed and I slept on the floor, which the girl in question and I had agreed on, I seemed to have defused the situation. Point of the story so far is he believed me and so does our Mother. Dad is one of my best mates and didnít seem terribly bothered. He and my sister went as far to say, that even if it were true that he were correct on his suspicions Ė he was over reacting. I have no idea what the situation was like with the girl and the others the following morning but I didnít hear anything negative at all.

Now that Iíve given this story its context, I can say that Iím a bit smitten by her and did email her late on Sunday evening, saying that it was nice to have met her and that I had hoped she had a good day. I didnít get a reply. Now, Iím not sure if she wants to disassociate herself with me (of which I doubt because right up until I left for work the following morning, we were getting on really well) or if the message simply was read and forgotten or if it even went through full stop. I know she was ill that evening (my fault, was recovering from a nasty cold.) She did upload some photographs of her and I at the party in question unto facebook later in the weekĖ I doubt sheíd have done so if I had been a real arse. Iím afraid to send a second email because I donít want to be stalkerish nor do I want to ask my brother about her becauseÖwell that last bit should be obvious by now. But I donít want to seem apathetic and just a user (of which Iím really not.)

I quite like her, but Iím not going to lose a great deal of sleep if this is just a one night stand. The issue is that she is one of my brotherís best friends right now. Not to mention she is in several classes with him. If I saw her again I imagine Iíd probably keep my cool and not give anything away. So basically, Iím trying to be really cautious. If it got out that this had taken place, well then Iíve basically lied to his faceÖIím just wondering if I can have some advice here because I most importantly, I donít want to mess anything up, not just between my brother and I, or she and I but between the two of them.

Umm, advice?? X

Posts: 4 | From: England | Registered: Aug 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Saffron Raymie
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 49582

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Am I right in thinking that the woman your brother is in a steady realtionship with is not the girl you engaged in sex with?

'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

Posts: 1285 | From: England | Registered: Oct 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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