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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Struggling without physical intimacy

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Author Topic: Struggling without physical intimacy
Djuna
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Member # 29269

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I think since my last breakup (which was a long-distance relationship, but this makes sense just fine to me all the same) I'm really struggling not having any physical intimacy like cuddling. I have a couple friends who are big cuddlers in Manchester, but I only get to see them maybe once a month, and I have a friend here who maybe cuddles a little but I see her maybe once a week. I feel like I need more than that to be happy! I'm not sure where to get that though. It's almost like I want to date prospective cuddlers (ie people I cuddle with and have emotional intimacy with but don't have sex with). I don't know how to approach that, I've always found people to cuddle with through serendipity.

Also I'm super fried today because I've been doing student assistance work and notetaking for a blind student all day and the emotional labor of it means I feel too drained for my self-care. Actually coming on here to post and try to do something good for myself feels like a massive effort. I could really use some pick-me-ups about now, folks. [Smile]

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In a strange room, before you are emptied for sleep, what are you. And when you are filled with sleep you never were. I dont know what I am. I dont know if I am or not... how often have I lain beneath rain on a strange roof, thinking of home.

Posts: 1269 | From: London, UK | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
fishmonger72
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I know what that's like. I used to have a friend that I would cuddle with and hug a lot. Then we had a period of not talking and I agree it is pretty hard to suddenly have no cuddling and far fewer hugs. Now that she's in a romantic relationship with someone it is not any easier. This whole post kind of got away from me sorry about that. I don't have any amazing advice or anything but I do understand what you're going through.
Posts: 6 | From: New York | Registered: Nov 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Djuna
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Member # 29269

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Thanks fishmonger. [Smile]

I feel lonely today. People aren't returning my texts, I've been trying to find someone to talk to all day and I've failed.

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In a strange room, before you are emptied for sleep, what are you. And when you are filled with sleep you never were. I dont know what I am. I dont know if I am or not... how often have I lain beneath rain on a strange roof, thinking of home.

Posts: 1269 | From: London, UK | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
WesLuck
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Member # 56822

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Yeah, sometimes it seems the world is conspiring against you, but it's probably you've just been unlucky today. [Smile] If people don't want to text back, that's their choice, not yours, so you haven't "failed". (Not that it makes it any easier when you want to talk and no-one is available. [Wink] )

Anyway, I'll send some big hugs your way! [Smile]

Posts: 540 | From: Australia | Registered: Feb 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
fishmonger72
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Member # 89500

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I hate those days when nobody seems to be answering texts. They're probably just busy but I know that doesn't make things feel any better.
Posts: 6 | From: New York | Registered: Nov 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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