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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Bestfriend is flirting with me

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Author Topic: Bestfriend is flirting with me
Member # 80512

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my bestfriend keeps flirting with me but I have a boyfriend and she knows that so how do I tell her to stop without hurting her feelings ? [Confused]
Posts: 6 | From: New Jersey | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Executive Director & Founder
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I feel like that's not a lot of information for me to go on, here.

Maybe give us some kind of an idea of what you mean by flirting, and if your best friend knows this is something she's doing?

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 39406

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A lot of this boils down to communication issues. First of all, what is your definition of flirting? What is your best friend's definition of flirting? If you two are not on the same page, things can be very confusing. She may just be showing affection or being playful in a way that you interpret as flirting. Either way, if it makes you uncomfortable, you should tell her. A good way to approach many situations, including this one, is with humor or a casual tone. It make the whole thing a lot less confrontational and easier to talk about. Try not to attack her or blame her. Ask her what her actions mean and what her intentions are. She may have underlying feelings, or she may just be joking around. Basically, just create a safe environment where you can both discuss how one another feels about the flirting.
Posts: 14 | From: DC | Registered: Jul 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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