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Author Topic: I love my married friend
Ghost2
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Member # 77775

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Help! I realised that I love my old friend! But the problem is that he is already married. But what makes the stiry worse is that I know that he loves me as well. We have always had some "balancing" friindship... ((
Posts: 2 | Registered: Aug 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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I feel like maybe a portion of this post got left out?

If not, what does "balancing" friendship mean? And given you know this friend isn't available to you for a romantic relationship, what's your plan to figure out how to acknowledge that you have those feelings, but also accept that the opportunity to do something with them isn't there for you right now?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About MeGet our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 67973 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ghost2
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Member # 77775

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"balancing" frindship means that we have always had something more than a friendship between us.
And my primary problem is that I can't decide if I should do anything to be with him, to destroy his family, etc. or just let him him go...

[ 09-02-2011, 07:38 AM: Message edited by: Ghost2 ]

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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I think if and when something anyone might do could earnestly "destroy" a family, that's a pretty easy indication that we need to think about that thing with tremendous care.

What would you do that you think could do that?

As well, if he has a marriage and a family where there are problems and issues, especially if there are kids involved, as someone who cares about him, have you thought about the fact that that's probably a lot bigger than a potential love affair? And that, as a good friend, as well as to take sound care of yourself, you might want to think about providing him the space to work through whatever those issues are before he makes any major life decisions that involve you?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About MeGet our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 67973 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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