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» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » I don't know what's going on

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Author Topic: I don't know what's going on
AponiKanti
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Member # 48252

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I'm 19, soon to be 20 and my boyfriend and I have been dating for nearly two years. I still love him very much, still care for him and his wellbeing and he still cares for me. I'm afraid that something is wrong with me though. Lately I've been feeling disconnected and, for lack of better phrasing, empty. I'm not sure what's going on, I have a history of depression and I've been experiencing health problems recently and the summer is causing issues with us being able to see each other and spend time together. I can't get past this sense that something's been stolen from me, and that it's him. Could it just be that my depression is coming back and I'm panicking and over reacting? I don't want to lose him or our relationship because of this weird feeling that he's not...in my heart for lack of better terming. Like, he's still there, but something is wrong, and it's not him. I don't know, but I feel like I need to tell someone and get some reassurance that I'm just crazy and should calm down.
Posts: 95 | From: Pennsylvania, USA | Registered: Aug 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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Do you see someone -- a mental healthcare provider -- for your depression?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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AponiKanti
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no i don't but i do have an antidepressant. I have other health problems, so it's too expensive to see a therapist right now
Posts: 95 | From: Pennsylvania, USA | Registered: Aug 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Brennan
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I currently take anti-depressants and know what it's like to be on the wrong one -- things seem a bit off... Not really WRONG, because you're still not DEPRESSED, per se, but just OFF.

I suggest you talk to your doctor about other medications / different dosages that might help you solve your problems. [Smile]

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Djuna
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Brennan, it's really not sound to attempt to assess someone medically over the internet. There is nothing like enough evidence here to suggest AponiKanti's prescription needs changing.

That said, by all means talk to your doctor about your options if you want to, AponiKanti. Too, you've said in posts before that you're in college - is that still the case? A lot of colleges offer counselling for free, which is really super awesome and might be a good fit for you if you're stretched financially. [Smile]

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“In a strange room, before you are emptied for sleep, what are you. And when you are filled with sleep you never were. I don’t know what I am. I don’t know if I am or not... how often have I lain beneath rain on a strange roof, thinking of home.”

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AponiKanti
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well, i know the medicine isn't the problem. to be honest i hate taking medicines, but i know my current one does work, i just don't always take it anymore because i've been on it for a while. as far as college goes, i'm at an online school and don't really enjoy phone conversations
Posts: 95 | From: Pennsylvania, USA | Registered: Aug 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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