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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » One night stand

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Author Topic: One night stand
HEYALL
Neophyte
Member # 35513

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Hey,

Well basically on Thursday i got off with this girl at the university union and ended up going back to hers and we did it. However i actually kinda like this girl, shes really the cute type, not slutty or anything, just a really nice girl.

The thing is in the morning i thought i was getting all the right signs, we chatted, snuggled and held hands ( at one point she properly had a good wee firm grasp on my hand ) so i took this as a sign that she liked me, plus the fact she took me back to hers. Also we had a good wee lie in for like an hour and a half before we parted cause she had a lecture that morning and she even said " i havent had a proper lie in on a weekday for a long time".

So i plucked enough courage up and asked her if she wanted to meet up again, but as she gave her answer she yawned ( was genuine ) and i didnt hear the answer as it was muffled, it was either possibly " i dont know " or a " i dont mind " im not sure and a awkward silence afterwards, as i was trying to figure out what she said and didnt really want to ask her again [Roll Eyes]

Anyway the entire time she didnt ask me for my number or facebook details so before we parted ways i asked her to add me and she asked for my last name so she could, and she did add me ( good sign? )

Ive had a few conversions with her over facebook
which were abit slow in replys but at points she did make an effort to ask me some stuff but nothing special and this afternoon, i was speaking to her but had to go and meet some friends so i asked her if she wanted to talk some more to text me and i left my number, but i haven't received anything. My friends are telling me to man up [Roll Eyes] and take the plunge and just ask her out for a drink or a coffee and you'll get your answer then and there. But not gonna lie, im bricking it [Razz]
From what i have explained what do you think? She seems abit of the shy type but i dunno. She seemed to give me the right vibes in the morning before we parted but now its almost abit awkward. confused.com [Razz]


Cheers

Posts: 23 | From: uk | Registered: Oct 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
OWL Dan
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It sounds like your chances are favorable to me. [Smile] My personal advice is the same as your friends'. If you don't ask, you will not know if she would say yes. [Wink] You may also end up regretting what might have been by not taking the chance to ask and know for certain. [Frown]

FYI: I have had more regrets about the "what ifs" than the "I shouldn't haves".

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Dan

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HEYALL
Neophyte
Member # 35513

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cheers for the advice, eughhhhhhhh i can just tell this is gonna end horrible [Razz] wish me luck.
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OWL Dan
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Hey, Please don't go in to this with the thought that it will end bad. Try to think positive like you know that you will succeed! You would be surprised how much your approach is affected by your mind set. From what you have already described, I think that you already have a great start. You have already had more than a first date [Wink] so all you are doing is asking for a second date. [Smile] I don't think that will be any problem for you and I have a feeling it will go well too.

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Dan

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Mortality
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If it's too scary to ask her out directly you can ask if she's gonna be at [some place/party/something] where you're gonna be.
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HEYALL
Neophyte
Member # 35513

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Hey, well she started texting me the other day but its kinda slowed down and she doesnt really reply much now :s and as Mortality said i was hoping she'd be at the university union/club tomorrow night but turns out shes wont be. So prob time to man up and go for it [Razz]
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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You know, sometimes if and when someone doesn't step up and ask to continue a relationship after a one-night stand, even someone interested in one may assume the other person isn't and just move on.

Obviously, if both people are interested, someone has got to step up to the plate. It's clear you are, so I'd go ahead and do that sooner rather than later. The worst she can say is no.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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OWL Dan
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Go for it! Don't forget, many people like to asked directly. It can show them how interestd you really are in them. [Smile]

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Dan

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HEYALL
Neophyte
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haha well job well done, asked her out for a drink and she replied yes [Smile]
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OWL Dan
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It wasn't that bad was it? [Wink] Enjoy!

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Dan

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HEYALL
Neophyte
Member # 35513

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heyyy, a wee update [Big Grin] Unfortunately before we could meet up all of a suddent she stopped replying to texts and started to ignore any time i asked when she wanted too meet up ( i never said or did anything bad ), which i thought was abit odd :s Yet when you went on her facebook all of her friends were saying how cute it was that she got a date. Baaaa, girls we shall never understand them [Wink]
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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This is so not about her gender. She's one girl. Seriously.

One way to deal with this kind of stuck place -- which, surprise, surprise, can be going on with men, too -- is to drop an email with something like, "Hey, it's cool if you lost interest in going out, but I just wanted to check in and see what was going on. If you'd still like to, so would I! If not, like I said, that's okay, but could you let me know so I don't wind up bugging you when I don't mean to? Thanks."

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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HEYALL
Neophyte
Member # 35513

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Cheers for the advise Heather, sorry for ending comment, wasnt meant misogynist. [Smile]
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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I didn't think that it was, no worries.

But also said what I did because gender essentialism actually makes it a lot harder to understand people, rather than easier. [Smile]

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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OWL Dan
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Hey, I wish you luck with this. At least you got some practice with asking someone out. [Wink] Hopefully the next time will not only be easier, but more successful. [Big Grin]

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Dan

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