Donate Now
We've Moved! Check out our new boards.
  New Poll  
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » need advice

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: need advice
TheCitizenErased
Activist
Member # 31269

Icon 1 posted      Profile for TheCitizenErased     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
well i guess i have quite a situation [Frown]
me and my gf have been goin for roughly 9 months and i truly do love her and i know she loves me.
but,recently shes been in moods so i asked her about it an she told me about it (family stuff and when we were on a break she kissed another guy but she said she felt like she cheated on me so i guess shes still quite guilty of it).
but ever since then in school shes been different around me.shes fine with everyone else apart from me.she talks to everyone else fine but i barely can get a word out of her.i feel neglected and likeive done something to upset her.also recently shes been hangin out with one of her friends which happens to be a boy.now from what shes told me he likes her but she staunchley says she does not and to be honest a believe her.ive found myself becoming jealous of him and other people that she talks to. [Confused]
i want to talk to her about it but i know she has a lot on her mind so i dont want to talk to her just now, but she usually jumps to conclusions and say i dont trust her etc
its really getting to me, i feel terrible and paranoid like she likes someone else or isnt interested in me anymore [Frown]
what do i do ? [Confused]

--------------------
Im Always Wishing Too Late ...

Posts: 68 | From: The Blue Planet | Registered: Oct 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
but ever since then in school shes been different around me.shes fine with everyone else apart from me.she talks to everyone else fine but i barely can get a word out of her.i feel neglected and likeive done something to upset her.
Have you told her this? If you have not, this is what I'd suggest talking about, just like this:

"Ever since what happened with you and that guy on break, I feel like you've been different around me. You seem to be the same with everyone else, but I feel like we don't talk anymore, or that it's difficult to, and I don't understand why. I'm feeling neglected, and like I've done something wrong, but I'm not sure if I have. What do you think?"

We can all have lots on our minds, but when we're with someone, we still need to be communicating with them. This sounds like a real problem, so it's time to start talking.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
TheCitizenErased
Activist
Member # 31269

Icon 1 posted      Profile for TheCitizenErased     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
i was planning to have a talk with her but she will probably go in a mood with me.i understand she has a lot on her mind (family member died and its their birthday soon) so if a start talkin to her about this she would say i dont want to about this right now. i know ive got to be patien but my patience is wearing thin [Frown]
thanks for your help Heather [Smile]

--------------------
Im Always Wishing Too Late ...

Posts: 68 | From: The Blue Planet | Registered: Oct 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Thing is, if she can be okay in dealing with her relationships with her friends, then she should be able to extend the same for you.

It'd be one thing if you were saying that she just can't deal with anyone at all right now, but everyone BUT you? Not so okay or so valid.

I don't see a reason to make a federal case out of this, or to make big plans about big talks. I'd simply, more casually, voice what I suggested up there the next time you're together.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
TheCitizenErased
Activist
Member # 31269

Icon 1 posted      Profile for TheCitizenErased     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
a guess your right [Smile]
thanks for you help [Smile]
really appreciate it

--------------------
Im Always Wishing Too Late ...

Posts: 68 | From: The Blue Planet | Registered: Oct 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

  New Poll   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3