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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » She's too sexy...

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Author Topic: She's too sexy...
HumanTeddyBear
Neophyte
Member # 34046

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Ok, so the whole dating thing didn't work out between us. She asked me to take a deep long look at our friendship over the years and I realized that we are like brother and sister. She then displayed a show of tough love saying that she won't fully trust me until I get over her but to still call her if I was hurting. Needless to say, under such circumstances I got over farily quickly.

However, there is still one problem. She's downright sexy and she knows it. She doesn't dress modestly either. I still have a few lustful thoughts about her on occasion. It doesn't bother me too much when I'm with her and we're hanging out, laughing, enjoying each other's company, and occasionally hugging or cuddling. But then if I'm home by myself one night with nothin but facebook pics of her in short shorts and on the beach in a bikini...enough said.

Is this a problem? Could this be a problem? If so, what do i do about it?

Posts: 28 | From: DC | Registered: May 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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You know, when we're attracted strongly to someone, they could be wearing a trash bag and we're often going to find them sexy.

I'm hearing a lot of what sounds like putting this on her, when really, it's about YOUR attraction. And certainly, we can still feel attraction to people, but yet choose to behave in whatever ways around them which they are most comfortable with.

She's asking not to date you, and for you not to pursue that. Doesn't sound to me like she's asking -- nor would it be fair to ask of you -- for you to somehow miraculously change that you find her attractive.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
HumanTeddyBear
Neophyte
Member # 34046

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Very well said!

I just got back from hangin out with her a little while ago and things are finally back to normal between us! I'm so happy!

You're right, I now understand how this is not a problem at all.

Posts: 28 | From: DC | Registered: May 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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