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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Drama

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Author Topic: Drama
Surferchk07
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So I just want to get some opinions on this.

I dated this girl for oh like a month but we only saw each other like 6 days out of that month. I then broke up with her after we had been fighting for about 2 weeks cause I honestly cant handle drama and she was just a young soul and im a political type, speak about the issues constently person and she couldnt handle it. It wasnt meant to work out and thats why It didnt.

Well anyway I've been just talking with this young woman from Virginia where my "Sister" lives and evidently today my X decided to message this girl on myspace and ask her if she had an aim than go off about me to this girl for an hour about how I am a liar and how much she is in love with me and how I broke her heart and backstabbed her.

Ive never dealt with this drama stuff before, Im a really mellow no drama style woman myself so to have someone just start contacting my friends and going off on me to them is just weird.

I have her blocked on my aim, deleteted from myspace and I dont answer when she calls but im wondering now since she did this should I confront her about it or just keep ignoring her and all her drama.

I dont want this stuff affecting my relationship with this other girl in VA or causing her to think im lying or not being believable when I am totally against lying and cheating and all about honesty. So I just dont know what to do.

Im wondering what yall would suggest?

[ 02-20-2007, 02:50 AM: Message edited by: Surferchk07 ]

--------------------
Elizabeth

"Peace is not the absence of war; it is a virtue; a state of mind; a disposition for benevolence; confidence; and justice." -Spinoza

Posts: 154 | From: Seattle, WA | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ecofem
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quote:
Originally posted by Surferchk07:
I dated this girl for oh like a month but we only saw each other like 6 days out of that month. I then broke up with her after we had been fighting for about 2 weeks cause I honestly cant handle drama and she was just a young soul and im a political type, speak about the issues constently person and she couldnt handle it. It wasnt meant to work out and thats why It didnt.

It sounds like a totally legit reason to have ended that relationship. Have you and this other woman talked about that; does she have your side of the story?

quote:
Well anyway I've been just talking with this young woman from Virginia where my "Sister" lives and evidently today my X decided to message this girl on myspace and ask her if she had an aim than go off about me to this girl for an hour about how I am a liar and how much she is in love with me and how I broke her heart and backstabbed her.
Hey, I'm originally from VA! [Smile] This sounds really crappy-- sorry to have to deal with it. I find it a bit odd that this VA girl actually listened to your ex, who she doesn't know from Adam (or Eve) spout unkind things about you. Did she feel stick or was only half-listening? I'd remain neutral on this, stating what you had mentioned at the beginning of this post, but not bad mouthing her (considering it tends to come back and bite you in the a**.)

It's a bit of a pickle because you aren't there to demonstrate your true nature in person. However, I'd assume that this VA person would lean more in support of you, knowing your sister and you first. If she should believe what your ex is saying, that's unfortunate, but no real loss on your part in the long-run.

quote:
Ive never dealt with this drama stuff before, Im a really mellow no drama style woman myself so to have someone just start contacting my friends and going off on me to them is just weird.
Yeah, such behavior IS pretty uncomfortable and just not smooth. I could see the first person maybe contacting your current interests if there were some risk factor involved, but it doesn't seem to be the case. And let's face it, going off on how much she still loves you is just... well, I'm sorta embarassed for her.

quote:
I have her blocked on my aim, deleteted from myspace and I dont answer when she calls but im wondering now since she did this should I confront her about it or just keep ignoring her and all her drama.
I'd keep ignoring her for now, although I'd write down any times she should contact and harass you. If you haven't already, I would answer once to tell her outwardly: "Please stop contacting me." Then, if she continues, she starts to verge on harassment. Maybe you could also consider reporting to Myspace admin if she keeps randomly bugging your friends?

quote:
I dont want this stuff affecting my relationship with this other girl in VA or causing her to think im lying or not being believable when I am totally against lying and cheating and all about honesty. So I just dont know what to do.
I understand where you're coming from; it's all very unpleasant to say the least. However, I'd just hope that this VA person trusts your word over the other girl's, and that you have a chance to demonstrate this over time. If the VA woman should end up wanting to call things off because of this, it'd be too bad, but really not a loss in the long-run. Have you talked to her about it yet? Try to stay cool and calm when talking to her about it; you apparently have nothing to hide and did nothing wrong, and the other girl's over-the-top reaction will seem odd.
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Surferchk07
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quote:
It sounds like a totally legit reason to have ended that relationship. Have you and this other woman talked about that; does she have your side of the story?
Yeah she knows it now. I think shes cool and understands everything.


quote:
Hey, I'm originally from VA! This sounds really crappy-- sorry to have to deal with it. I find it a bit odd that this VA girl actually listened to your ex, who she doesn't know from Adam (or Eve) spout unkind things about you. Did she feel stick or was only half-listening? I'd remain neutral on this, stating what you had mentioned at the beginning of this post, but not bad mouthing her (considering it tends to come back and bite you in the a**.)

It's a bit of a pickle because you aren't there to demonstrate your true nature in person. However, I'd assume that this VA person would lean more in support of you, knowing your sister and you first. If she should believe what your ex is saying, that's unfortunate, but no real loss on your part in the long-run.

I think she listened to her cause she had no clue how to block her haha. When I got online I was like "why didnt you just block her" shes like "how do you do that". So I think she understands that hey its a crazy ex of mine and anything she says well just ignore it haha.


quote:

Yeah, such behavior IS pretty uncomfortable and just not smooth. I could see the first person maybe contacting your current interests if there were some risk factor involved, but it doesn't seem to be the case. And let's face it, going off on how much she still loves you is just... well, I'm sorta embarassed for her.

Its all really funny I mean I laughed so hard about it this morning when I thought about it all last night. We dated for a month it wasnt like we were dating for 4 years and going to get married. Oh well, it just shows how immature she is that she would go crazy like this. Shes a young soul though and I knew better than to get involved with someone who is a young soul because I am an old soul yet I still did and see what happened! :-P Next time im looking at those palms more.


quote:
I'd keep ignoring her for now, although I'd write down any times she should contact and harass you. If you haven't already, I would answer once to tell her outwardly: "Please stop contacting me." Then, if she continues, she starts to verge on harassment. Maybe you could also consider reporting to Myspace admin if she keeps randomly bugging your friends?
Yeah Im writing down all the times she is contacting me just in case she gets more crazy.....If she continues it I may contact myspace about it.


quote:
I understand where you're coming from; it's all very unpleasant to say the least. However, I'd just hope that this VA person trusts your word over the other girl's, and that you have a chance to demonstrate this over time. If the VA woman should end up wanting to call things off because of this, it'd be too bad, but really not a loss in the long-run. Have you talked to her about it yet? Try to stay cool and calm when talking to her about it; you apparently have nothing to hide and did nothing wrong, and the other girl's over-the-top reaction will seem odd.
Ah me and the VA chk are not dating just good friends.... Long distance == not my thing. haha.

I think everythings blown over my one friend in VA is cool with everything now and just is laughing about how crazy my ex went. And as for my ex well I have no clue what she will do next but if she continues to be crazy maybe I will have to file something in court like a restraining order or something.

Thanks Lena for the response, I think I just needed to vent this all out to someone.

--------------------
Elizabeth

"Peace is not the absence of war; it is a virtue; a state of mind; a disposition for benevolence; confidence; and justice." -Spinoza

Posts: 154 | From: Seattle, WA | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ecofem
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quote:
Originally posted by Surferchk07:
Ah me and the VA chk are not dating just good friends.... Long distance == not my thing. haha.

I think everythings blown over my one friend in VA is cool with everything now and just is laughing about how crazy my ex went. And as for my ex well I have no clue what she will do next but if she continues to be crazy maybe I will have to file something in court like a restraining order or something.

Thanks Lena for the response, I think I just needed to vent this all out to someone.

You're welcome, and I'm glad to hear things have calmed down. [Smile] Ahh, yeah, I wasn't sure if you and your VA friend were platonic or that you were hoping for something more and your ex seemed to be sabotaging it.
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Surferchk07
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quote:
Originally posted by Ecofem:
quote:
Originally posted by Surferchk07:
Ah me and the VA chk are not dating just good friends.... Long distance == not my thing. haha.

I think everythings blown over my one friend in VA is cool with everything now and just is laughing about how crazy my ex went. And as for my ex well I have no clue what she will do next but if she continues to be crazy maybe I will have to file something in court like a restraining order or something.

Thanks Lena for the response, I think I just needed to vent this all out to someone.

You're welcome, and I'm glad to hear things have calmed down. [Smile] Ahh, yeah, I wasn't sure if you and your VA friend were platonic or that you were hoping for something more and your ex seemed to be sabotaging it.
haha yeah um if I was in VA maybe it would be different but im not. So were buddies.

Evidently my ex just messaged this girls friend on her page and asked all about this VA girl like shes falling for this girl now too. Damn shes gone crazy. This is all too funny for me. Am I mean for laughing? haha

--------------------
Elizabeth

"Peace is not the absence of war; it is a virtue; a state of mind; a disposition for benevolence; confidence; and justice." -Spinoza

Posts: 154 | From: Seattle, WA | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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