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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » cousin doesn't want anything to do with us

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Author Topic: cousin doesn't want anything to do with us
Member # 32524

Icon 9 posted      Profile for NervousFreak     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
This is a really long story, but I need to talk about it

About four years ago my aunt and uncle went to Mexico on vacation with their two kids (12 and 14 at the time) the thing is they were having issues in their marriage that I didn't know about, I'm not sure anyone did

My Uncle was letting my cousins drink, especially Chris the older one, which my Auntie didn't agree with, at one point Chris was throwing up on the floor, so my Auntie tried to help and my uncle ended up picking Chris up and them let him fall face first on the marble floor of their hotel room

So my Aunt got a separate room, but only my one cousin would go stay with her, Chris wanted to stay with his Dad, My uncle took Chris and tried to get back to Canada with him, but he didn't have the passports and ended up in Vegas (i think) Travis (uncle) was really crazy, he was threatening to kill my grandparents and pretty much everyone else in our family

It ended up being a really messy divorce and for a while my Auntie and my one cousin didn't have any clothes because he wouldn't let them back in the house, and my Dad had to go with them, and the police so they could get clothes.

Now that's all over, but Chris still doesn't want anything to do with us, we used to be really close, we grew up together, and now he won't talk to me. I feel selfish because I'm concerned about me; I can't even imagine how my Auntie must feel. It's gotten to the point where I talk about him the past tense, he's supposed to be graduating this year and I can't go see him graduate.

I guess I just wanted to tell someone, my BF has been really supportive, but I don't feel comfortable talking to my family about it, we've never really talked about it, it just tears me apart that someone who used to be my best friend, doesn't want anything to do with me

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary-wise; what it is it wouldn't be, and what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?

Posts: 14 | From: Alberta, Canada | Registered: Feb 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 29269

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Djuna     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Try sending him a birthday/christmas/easter/insert-upcoming-date-here card, and put your number in there asking him to call you if he'd like a chat.
Maybe curiosity will get the better of him, who knows.
I hope this helps anyway. [Smile]

In a strange room, before you are emptied for sleep, what are you. And when you are filled with sleep you never were. I dont know what I am. I dont know if I am or not... how often have I lain beneath rain on a strange roof, thinking of home.

Posts: 1269 | From: London, UK | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 31745

Icon 1 posted      Profile for muisy     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
First of all I would just like to say that I am sorry for what happened. I know what it's like to be really close to your cousins and then not really have them at all. I don't mean to be saying this offensively to you, honestly, but it's probably a lot harder on your cousin than the situation has been for you. It might be hard for him to stay in contact with you guys because it's just too difficult, that past for him won't go away, and your family played a part in that. Unfortunately I don't have much advice. As hard as this might be for you to fully accept you might have to just accept that he just won't be in your life anymore. Maybe you can send him a letter, telling him congrats, and then letting him know that you understand how it might be difficult for him to stay in touch, but let him know that you miss him and if he ever wants to reach you he can. Or leave a message with his mom, your aunt. Unfortunately, if he doesn't want to stay in touch, I'd let him have his space. Maybe things will change in the future, I really hope that they do for you, really. Hope things work out.
Posts: 40 | From: US | Registered: Dec 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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