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Author Topic: want to help my friend
samantha357
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Member # 29651

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ok my friend, lets call her D, has a MAJOR crush on this guy, lets call him C. she is obcessed with him to put it bluntly, and she kills herself wondering if he likes her like that too. he knows(or knew) that she likes him, but that was a month ago and who knows what this guy is thinking by now. She really wants to tell him that she still likes him and needs to hear him say to her himself if he likes her, but she is so super shy around guys, and it doesn't help that she likes him so much.

I really dont think its healthy for her to like a guy this deeply this long. Ive tryed everything i can think of to try and help her get over him, but nothing works. The only sign that she's alive under there is that she is telling me she wants out of these emotions. "She cant handle feeling this way and not really knowing if she can have him."

How can i help her???

[ 11-16-2006, 08:06 PM: Message edited by: samantha357 ]

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"All is fair in love in war... wait... that doesn't sound right..."

The love you cant have lasts the longest, feels the strongest... & hurts the deepest

Posts: 81 | From: Oklahoma, USA | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Trasvi
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Member # 31498

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Maybe telling her to 'get over it' is part of the problem. I was totally infatuated with this girl (E) once, we went out for about 2 weeks before circumstances made us break it off. For ages i was totally depressed, upset, R was the only thing in the world to me, etc etc, and people just told me to 'get over it' and 'there's always someone else'

But now, three years later i still had never stopped loving her and now we are going out. We are totally in love and i've never felt happier.

Now, im not saying that she is going to end up going out with this guy. But maybe you shouldnt just think that getting her out is going to make her feel better.

Get her to talk to him. I know if me and my girlfriend had talked about our problems sooner then we would have saved a lot of heartache.

If necessary just go ask him youself exactly how he feels, and relay the news to your friend, if its going to have a good effect.

Do other things to get her mind off of him. Go out for big fun days/nights out and let her have fun. If shes having fun she probably won't be thinking about how depressing her relationship is.

Talk to her about her feelings/depression as well. She might not think that you'll understand, and you might not totally get where she is coming from, but listen to her anyway and give what advice you can.

I have been in her situation before. Its not fun and i think i would be longing after her for the rest of my life if we hadn't gotten back together.

Trasvi.

Posts: 14 | From: Australia | Registered: Nov 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
samantha357
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thanks i'll try talking to him, but these two have never dated and she not drepressed she told me herself that she wants to stop liking him so much. I dont tell her "get over it" etc. ive tryed girls night out stuff but everything takes her back to him.

i liked a guy that much b4, but once he found out we started dating and well thats what she was thinking when she told him. But its been 5 weeks and he hasnt mentioned it to her. She has tryed talking to him, about anything, just to get a conversation going. She has called him a couple times for various reasons, (get some phone # he might have, etc.) but he answers her and then ends the phone call/conversation ASAP.

I can see what she sees in him, after all, musicianship melts both of our hearts(he has a golden voice and can play piano). i just want for her whatever will make her happy, a right now that's talking this out with him, if not dating him.

And i dont think she could handle the 'three years later' thing [Smile]

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"All is fair in love in war... wait... that doesn't sound right..."

The love you cant have lasts the longest, feels the strongest... & hurts the deepest

Posts: 81 | From: Oklahoma, USA | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Lokijuhy-Bob
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i think talkig to him for her (if she wont herself) is the only thing that wil work if u've tryed everything else to help her get over him like u've said.

I wish you and your friend the best of luck [Wink]

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i need help.. LEAVE ME ALONE!!!

Posts: 1 | From: OK | Registered: Nov 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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