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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » trying to let go

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Author Topic: trying to let go
Michelle09
Neophyte
Member # 26194

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My ex and i are still cool with each other. He broke up with me in febuary and we didnt talk for a while. But then we started talking to each other again. We loved each other and i probably loved him more, who knows.
The problem is that im having trouble letting go. I still love him but we just cant be together we do better as friends. I think he still loves me to. We just dont want to admit it to each other.
He recently made me mad, so i was like it's time to get over him it has been to long. So i told him never to call or talk 2 me again. He got mad and said some stuff and i did to.
Im not sure but i think it was wensday i told him that and he texted me last night saying he missed me. But he put i miss u friend. What does that mean. [Confused] I miss him so much to but i just cant go back through that again. I wanted to say i miss u 2 but i just didnt say nothin. Im trying to let go but i cant. My heart says no but everything else like my head says yes.
What do i do?

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Michelle

Posts: 9 | From: Dallas TX | Registered: Nov 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
twentysix
Activist
Member # 26852

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Hi Michelle, I'm in a similiar situation. Letting go is extremely hard when you've been in such a serious relationship, but you have to remind yourself of the reasons you broke up, and accept why things didn't work out.

Try keeping yourself busy with friends, movies, and any other hobbies. Heck, try something new! You're not in a relationship anymore, so enjoy the extra time you have now.

If your friendship with this guy is full of drama, you might want to consider not talking to him, because it may just be prolonging your pain. When you feel the urge to call him, go for a walk or call a designated friend. Try your best to assert your independence from your exboyfriend. It will be hard, but trust me, your newfound strength with be rewarding.

Posts: 86 | From: california | Registered: Jan 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
-Jill
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 5375

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twentysix has some good advice. Additionally, if you do want to be friends some time, but now just isn't that time (that's how I'm reading this) you can set some guidelines to make that happen.

Perhaps take a month or two to be away from him. That should give you enough time to re-establish yourself as your own person, not part of a couple. Once you feel like you're where you want to be you can decide if you want to be friends or prefer being without him.

The time off will give you some perspective and hopefully help you make a decision based on what's best for you.

Posts: 3641 | From: Truckee, CA, US | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
br0ken
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Member # 29131

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I just wanted to stop by and say that I'm in a similar situation, and that it kills me everyday...and everyone that knows me knows it..It's hard. [Frown]
Posts: 5 | From: Virginia | Registered: May 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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