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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » ok to be not ready?

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Author Topic: ok to be not ready?
Member # 27045

Icon 5 posted      Profile for Ladygirl18     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hey! I'm 17 and I've been going out with a great guy for 6 months. We have a long-distance relationship since he's at college and don't get to see each other more than once or twice a month, except for holidays. He's an incredibly sweet guy, and we have a really solid and trusting relationship.

My problem is that I'm not ready to do basicallly anything sexual. We tried the petting thing, but it didn't feel good and totally turned me off. I masturbate, so im not devoid of sexuality, I just don't feel comfortable doing anything with him other than making out even though he is ready to. He says it doesn't bother him, and I really don't think it does most of the time, and it's really not him I'm worried about, I just want to know if it's weird for me to be completely not ready to do anything with him after so long. I feel like a prude for being unwilling to do anything, and I feel really bad for making him stop, even though I know it's the right thing to do. It's probably worth mentioning that this is my first serious relationship, and only my second boyfriend ever.

Posts: 48 | From: Los Angeles, CA, USA | Registered: Jan 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Member # 139

Icon 10 posted      Profile for DarkChild717     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
It's okay not to want to do anything, or go further than you want. Your partner seems to understand that.

Allow yourself to become comfortable, and trusting of your partner. If that can't happen, then perhaps you need to re-evaluate the relationship. If you can gain that trust and comfort, experiment. While one thing might not do it for you, something else will.

Posts: 2789 | From: The Evergreen State | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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