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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Trouble in paradise

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Author Topic: Trouble in paradise
cherry32
Neophyte
Member # 23371

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Well my boyfriend and I have been together for 4 months and i love him very much. But we just recently got this new girl at our school at first I thought she was really nice until she started flirting with my boyfriend. That really made me mad. He doesnt flirt with her or anything but I am just afird that he will start giving her the attention that she wants. I guess I am threated by her. But I cant really figure out why she is not all that pretty. Im not trying to sound concided or anything but I think I look alot better than her. I have tried to talk to him but he really doesnt have anything to say about it he just thinks im jelous because she said he was cute.... Can anyone give me some advice
Posts: 21 | Registered: May 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Sounds like this is about you, not your partner. Also sounds like he's right.

No matter who you're with, or for how long, other people are likely to find your partner attractive, and may harmlessly flirt. It's human nature, it happens. Your partner (and you) are also likely to find other people attractive, nand may be flirty yourselves. Also, human.

But if you and yours have an agreement to be monogamous, and you both are, there's nothing to be jealous of. A relationship is not a monopoly on someone's interest or attention, rather, it's an agreement for two people to be together exclusively in a given way.

(And do yourself a favor: stop comparing yourself to other women and vice-versa, as if all women were in some sort of competition or beauty contast. It's nonproductive and just plain destructive when it comes to decent relationships with other women.)


Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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