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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » is this love...???

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Author Topic: is this love...???
cutiedel
Neophyte
Member # 25500

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I had a good friend of mine in my school times, we used to sit together because of our roll nos. I used to like him a lot but never talked to him frankly in school. I was always ready to help him. My friends said that it's a love which I denied. At that time I was 14 years old. But as I grew I felt that my feelings for him went on growing stronger and stronger. I controlled myself alot but couldn't forget him. After completing schooling he went abroad for higher studies and we continued emailing each other. Though in school we used to talk very less but we open ourselves in emails. Further after a year(of leaving from here) he got some scheme on his landline and was allowed to make free ISD calls..... Then what he did call me.... But I feel it was all for some of his personal reasons, may be he considered me his time pass. I asked him many a times if he calls me only or his other friends also for which he replied that only I was his regular caller and he talks to no one else. I used to feel pleased at this But somewhere in my mind there was a hunch that he is cheating me.... One day I told him that I had a crush on him for which he replied "Thank You".... I did this in my class XII also, when we had afarewell party I called him after going back home and said "I like him" for which he replied that we'll talk over this aftere main exams... Even I too thought that it was not a right time to say all that... but I had no choice.... I wanted him to know about my feelings and wanted to listen to him as well..... He never said anything regarding me nor did he appreciated me But yes when i asked him what's his interests, he simply stated what all is not there in me...

Now what I came to know was that he used to call each of my friends daily and sometimes even twice a day and talked to them for hours... But to me he used to call only once a day and that too for only 30-35 mins... I shared alot of things with him even the topic was Sex was discussed alot of times and we were very open too each other.... But this irritated me when I came to know it from my friends that he shared the topic of SEX with them also... i used o wait for his calls and even bunked my classes just to talk to him....(for me bunking is like a big task to do, as i m my class topper). One of my friends told me that he said ,I bores him. I was really depressed with all this and cried for many days. But didn't discuss anything with him. I want him to sit in front of him and talk about this so that i can see what his emotions are. As i feel emails are emotionless. Now when i want to forget him, I m unable to do so and even today I look eagerly for his emails, which he never sends....I am in a great dilemma.... am i in love with him??? I want him to stay close to me. i want him to come back which i know he will not.... i want to talk to him but not daily.... Is this a love??? Or am i searhing a dark street??? I really don't know anything about him... But I feel he is nice though I have heard everything bad about him.... But I still miss him..... Also the problem with me is that i do not like staying with boys or having boyfriends or so.... but i can't forget him...... plz help...


Posts: 2 | From: new delhi,india | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
coolestdesignz
Activist
Member # 18028

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Define love.

I don't think it is. It sounds like you have strong feelings for him, but if he actually said that you bore him... it's probably not going to go very far.

The best thing you could do would probably be to talk to him about it directly- at least then all your questions would be answered.


Posts: 203 | From: Laguna Niguel, CA, USA | Registered: May 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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