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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Lost love :-( help me

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Author Topic: Lost love :-( help me
twinklyc8782
Neophyte
Member # 23742

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On new years eve i met my first love, he was the loveliest person ive ever met and we started dating straight away. Although i soon came to realise that he didnt have all the time i had for him, but i stuck with it because i thought i loved him. He loved his space thought, not me. Even so i still stuck at it. After all our problems we made it to through until recently when he broke up with me by text. Ive come to realise now that hes not the person i thought he was, yet still i cant seem to not love him. I just really wanted to know if there is anything i can do that doesnt mean i have to find somebody else right now. And, to stop sitting around and drowning my sorrows, and should i tell him that i dont want anything to do with him anymore? Will that make things easier? Even though he wants to be friends i just dont think i can..

[This message has been edited by twinklyc8782 (edited 06-04-2005).]


Posts: 7 | From: England | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Jenna D.
Activist
Member # 18964

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If you don't want to be friends with him, that's okay. I don't want to have anything to do with my ex either, because I'm too mad at him and having him around in any form would just make me too upset and I don't want to feel that way anymore, it's too draining. He might be upset when you tell him, but if that's what you need move on, you should do it.

Hope you feel better soon!


Posts: 72 | From: Scarborough, Ontario, Canada | Registered: Jul 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
twinklyc8782
Neophyte
Member # 23742

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Thanks, its nice to know im not the only one, i know i need to move. Some people are very selfish with others feelings. At least its taught me a vaulable lesson and make sure i watch who i trust and respect the feelings of others :-) Every cloud has a silver lining i suppose.
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-Jill
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 5375

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How long ago did the relationship end? It does take time to get over someone. Keeping busy and spending time with other friends usually helps but nothing really makes it easy.

As jayintheuk said it's okay to not want to be friends. You might even want to tell him that friendship isn't an option right now so he knows not to push you. This isn't to say you'll never want to be friends with him but don't hesitate to take some time and distance.


Posts: 3641 | From: Truckee, CA, US | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
mochachoco
Neophyte
Member # 23793

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You should take your time to let your emotions heal.
Being friends with a guy after breaking up, especially if he meant alot to you, is VERY tough.
I found from my experiences that you shouldn't become his friend right away. You should both lead separate lives until both of you feel emotionally stable. It's hard to get over a guy if you continue to hang out with him and talk to him, even as friends. I think I read that somewhere too.
Smile, be happy =)

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twinklyc8782
Neophyte
Member # 23742

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Thanks alot for your replies, they really helped. I spoke to my ex and let him know how i felt. I just hope he understands. Mochachoco, i think you know where im at, thanks for the reply it really made me think. Another key aspect to an easier break up is good friends standing by you, so i can keep smiling :-)
Posts: 7 | From: England | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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