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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Here we go again...

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Author Topic: Here we go again...
Member # 17353

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A apologize for this being so long, but it really is necessary. \

Ok, I broke up with my long term boyfriend a while ago, and have been pretty much fine since then. The day I broke up with him a really good friend confessed that he's had a huge crush on me for a long time. Well, today I had a 4-H Dance Committee meeting and I really didn't feel like getting out of the house because I have five busted ribs and I'm up to my ears in pain medication. Anyway, I was talking to him and told him I felt bad but was coming to the meeting anyway. He called everyone else on the committee (like three other people) and had them all make the 2 hour drive from town to our place so that I wouldn't have to get out. He's about the sweetest person in the world! So we had our meeting, and everyone else went home and we sat around talking for a while (he's still here, just making dinner with my Mom) and discussing the possibility of an "us". I'm really not comfortable with being in a serious relationship right now, even with someone as stable and dependable as him. The option of "very good friends with benefits" came up, and we both sort of like the idea. That way we can take it really slow and just see where things go. I've never been in a relationship like this before, and was wondering if someone who's not taking four different narcotic pain killers could line out the risks and benefits for me, lol. He's here now, and I'm scared to death that I'll make the wrong decision. My last relationship ended badly, and I dont want a repeat.


Ride it like you stole it!

Posts: 64 | From: Carlsbad, NM USA | Registered: Mar 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 18028

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Well, here's an idea for you. Think about what you want for yourself. Don't do anyhting right now, seeing as you have a drug-addled mind.

Some pro's & cons (some of these might not make sense because I'm giving them from 2 points of view):

pro: relationship
con: relationship

friends w/b-
pro: sometimes nice, fun, and harmless
con: limits possible relationship(s)

Just something to think about. (Might even be fun to think about if you're as messed-up as you say you are :> )

Posts: 203 | From: Laguna Niguel, CA, USA | Registered: May 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 568

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our FAQ says...
Friends With Benefits/Casual Sex

the most important thing is that you both agree to it and now what it all entails. if one of you feels that it's not what you really wanted (i.e., he really wanted a girlfriend), then it's going to be unfulfilling and can be emotionally painful.

Q ... E ... D ... bee-yatch!
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Posts: 12677 | From: Los Angeles, CA ... somewhere off the 10 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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