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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » He says im horrible...

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Author Topic: He says im horrible...
biffygrl7869
Neophyte
Member # 12707

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i need anyones help. first of all i have been dating my bf for 7 months. recently he told me i suck at giving head..then he apologized and said he was joking. hes like "i just dont like being pleasured..id rather pleasure the girl" this was a HUGE setback for me. What if i LIKE pleasuring him...and it doesnt make him happy? What should i do.
Posts: 1 | From: NJ | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
DiamondGirl2K
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Hi,
Well I guess there isn't much you can do if he doesn't want you to perform oral sex on him. If he's not happy getting it, I don't see how you can be happy giving it. Pleasure is supposed to go both ways. You could talk to him and find out what else he finds pleasurable as he is the only person who can tell you. Pleasure doesn't just mean sexually either.
My boyfriend and I have been dating for 18 months and I really love him. But we still haven't had intercourse with each other and that's perfectly fine. I have performed oral sex on him and he likes it. But that's not the only way we pleasure each other. Sometimes we:
-"Make love" on the phone: it's really just blowing kisses and giving hugs....lol
-Hold hands and hug a lot
-Have a really good conversation about life in general
-Eat dinner together
Basically there are so many things to do and that's just a few. That's pleasure enough for me. Find out what you have it common and take a shot at it....you'll see what I mean!

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*~BoNNiE~*
~n~
*~ClYde~*
'03'
9~27~01
@<<-----
Still Going Strong!
Forever and Always!


Posts: 137 | From: The Home of The Greatest: NY | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
angelkakes9
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Member # 9873

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He should definetly not tell you that you suck. Everybody is bad when they first start. I had like no idea what I was doing when I first started giving blow jobs. But you will get better. Tell him unless he never wants to get a blow job again, he should allow you to practice to get better. How many normal guys should argue with that. But at the same time, allow his mouth to be full too.
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a_c_munson
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Comunication is key. Ask him what feels good and what he likes.
Every one has different taste
he may not like to recieve oral sex
just like some people don't like anal sex
It could be a matter of tate

Posts: 94 | From: plymouth,mn,usa | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
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y'know, it's so important to tell your partner your wants and needs, but i hope your boyfriend didn't phrase it in those terms because if he did, he really needs to take a lesson in TACT.

If giving is just as important to you as getting, then you and your boyfriend are going to need to strike a balance in your activities. You need to tell him how important it is to you to give, similar to how he said he prefer to please his girl. and if he doesn't like how you perform oral sex, then you can find other ways to go about it.
And if he tells you, "You suck at giving head," then what you really ought to be saying is, "Hope you're limber 'cause you're not coming back till you learn to speak to me with some RESPECT."

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Mmm ... crispy, delicious bacon.


Posts: 12677 | From: Los Angeles, CA ... somewhere off the 10 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
AlwaysWorried
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Just a quick note, maybe it was meant to be a joke and you took it too seriously, do no-one notice the pun there?

"You suck at giving head."

Then again, maybe I'm just looking to hard at it, go get some respect from him.


Posts: 125 | From: Leicestershire, England | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
-Jill
Scarleteen Volunteer
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quote:
Originally posted by angelkakes9:
Tell him unless he never wants to get a blow job again, he should allow you to practice to get better. How many normal guys should argue with that.

Just a reminder, there are plenty of perfectly normal people who don't like oral sex. It's all personal preference.

And really, using ultimatums in a relationship is rarely helpful; they tend to just make people angry or hurt. As was said before, communication is the way to go, not threats.


Posts: 3641 | From: Truckee, CA, US | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
rdarker
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first of all you should just break up with him u should just find another guy that would like you giving him the pleasler

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ryan darker


Posts: 1 | From: edmonton | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
DiamondGirl2K
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quote:
Originally posted by rdarker:
first of all you should just break up with him u should just find another guy that would like you giving him the pleasler

I have to disagree with rdarker because like somone said not everyone likes oral sex. Just because he or she doesn't like it should not mean they are abnormal in anyway. It's fine to like it and it's fine not to like it. Everyone is different because not everyone likes that same things.

------------------
*~BoNNiE~*
~n~
*~ClYde~*
'03'
9~27~01
@<<-----
Still Going Strong!
Forever and Always!


Posts: 137 | From: The Home of The Greatest: NY | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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