For the past several years, since I noticed I was a sexual being, I guess, I have been told repeatedly that I am very mature. I used to feel that this was a great thing to be. Now, though, I feel that I just want to be my real age. I want to act 17. I also want to be liked by 17 year old guys. I've had lot's of older guy-friends who've told me that they would love to date me, but I feel I'm not ready for an older relationship. But since I started high school, none of my peers have shown an active interest in me. I can't help who I am, whether I'm mature or immature. My school is very large, and there's really no lack of guys . I will be candid: I am attractive, not beautiful. I can be sarcastic, self-centered, kind, blunt, overbearing, silly, moody, and witty. I am active in several clubs. How can I get asked out?
Posts: 5 | From: Central Valley, CA, USA | Registered: Aug 2002
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Sounds to me like you have a level head on your shoulders. I was expecting something else when I read the title of the thread. Good for you, you want to be 17 while you can! Well the problem maybe that 17 year old guys are quite inexperinced at asking girls out and it scares them, esspecially if she's attractive. So my advice is stop waiting, ask one of them out. You may run the risk of being told no, but that's the risk guys face too. Keep that handle on reality you have, it's working well for you.
------------------ We are starstuff, we are the universe made manifest, trying to figure itself out
I don't think any of us really know any surefire way to get "asked out." If we did, you can bet we'd be spending less time on the boards and more time dating repeatedly.
In all seriousness though, maturity really isn't a bad thing. But I think there is a very palpable difference between being mature and acting mature. Maturity isn't something that can be tried on and then shunned at a later date when one finds that it isn't working for him or her. It is something that comes as an outgrowth of life experience, as opposed to a role that can be stepped into and abandoned at will.
A large part of maturity is centered around the ability to get along with wide varieties of people. This would include both the older friends you described and your schoolmates. Sometimes we unwittingly shoehorn ourself into being freiendly to a certain group of people just by default...and I am inclined to believe that is what you may have done. In hanging out with an older crowd, perhaps you focused less attention on people your own age.
But true maturity should be able to bail you out of this situation. It will allow you the ability to meld back into the lives of people your own age, and it should also afford you the knowledge that being in high school is more than just finding a date. Either way though, if you are as mature as you say, you'll do just fine. Good luck!
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