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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Hiding your feelings, wrong or right?

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Author Topic: Hiding your feelings, wrong or right?
babiblew
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Hi, Im kinda new at all this but I ive had some things on my mind that ive been questioning. So im hoping that some people might be able to help.
Okay, im in love with my boyfriend and we've been dating a year and 5 months but I just started talking to a friend of mine who I used to like and am sort of starting to get feelings for him again. Is it wrong or is it just normal for me to be feeling like this. Because I mean, im not feeling like I want to break up with my boyfriend or anything. Im just feeling like I care about him. So..I really need some advice. Thanks!!

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*babi-blew*


Posts: 8 | From: Hagan, Georgia US | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Victoria
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Hey. I might have a little trouble putting this in the right words, but I hope you'll get what I'm saying...
I don't think it is wrong at all for you to be having feelings for anyone besides your boyfriend, I think its normal.(I'm not specifically saying a certain kind of feeling for someone else, but any feeling you may be having). Its never wrong to just care about someone else. The main question is though.. How do YOU feel about feeling this way?

Posts: 23 | From: PA, US | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
babiblew
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quote:
Originally posted by Victoria:
Hey. I might have a little trouble putting this in the right words, but I hope you'll get what I'm saying...
I don't think it is wrong at all for you to be having feelings for anyone besides your boyfriend, I think its normal.(I'm not specifically saying a certain kind of feeling for someone else, but any feeling you may be having). Its never wrong to just care about someone else. The main question is though.. How do YOU feel about feeling this way?

thanks Victoria!! I just didnt know if it was right, or wrong. The answer to your Question is..I feel wrong for feeling this way. I feel like if I keep talking to my 'friend' then its going to mess my relationship with my boyfriend up. And, I just feel wrong in general for feeling something for another boy. Am I crazy?

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*babi-blew*


Posts: 8 | From: Hagan, Georgia US | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Sun Wu
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In my opinion, if you feel talking to this guy is going to mess up your relationship... Then stop talking to him.
Posts: 117 | From: Where does my name remind you of? well it's wrong! | Registered: Feb 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
babiblew
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quote:
Originally posted by Sun Wu:
In my opinion, if you feel talking to this guy is going to mess up your relationship... Then stop talking to him.

yea, I think ur right. Thanks!!

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*babi-blew*


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SirenRose
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i think that having feelings for someone else while in a relationship is no crime. Feelings are feelings. You care for him, and thats all it probably is. Probably just as friends, and since u have no desire to break-up with ur boyfriend, there is no real jeopardy of ur relationship. though i think u should tell ur bf about these feelings, and talk about it. ask him if he has ever felt that way about someone else. its an idea.

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me myslef and i


Posts: 138 | From: ur dreams | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
celery
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I have a boyfriend and I know this other guy and he was all flirty with me one night, and I dunno, I thought I liked him a bit, but I would never break up with my boyfriend for him.

That 'crush' only lasted a few days, so I guess I just liked the attention I got from that guy.

So my suggestion is stay with your boyfriend and don't risk losing what you have with him for a crush.


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Moth
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It's perfectly alright to have feelings for someone other than your SO. It's only a problem if you act on them in a way that's not acceptable to your relationship . . . if you think, by even being with this guy, you'll compromise yourself (that sounds so silly and old-fashioned!) you need to either try not to spend private time with him, or break up with your b/f, or redefine your relationship . . . I really think, though, that it's possible to spend time with someone you adore without cheating. It just takes a little self control.
Posts: 72 | From: NY, USA | Registered: Feb 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
babiblew
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Thanks a lot you guys!! I really was confused..but yall helped!! Thank you soo much!!

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*babi-blew*


Posts: 8 | From: Hagan, Georgia US | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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