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Author Topic: This summer?
vballgrlie17
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Hey Everyone...
I've posted on this topic a few times before so I'm sorry if everyone is sick of hearin about it...

Just to sum it up, my boyfriend and I broke up almost 2 months ago after a 6 month relationship. It came suddenly to me and was like a slap in the face...how could this happen? I loved him so much, what else could I have done to mkae him happy? When did he stop loving me?
Despite his efforts to try to explain it to me as best as he could (he tells me that hes still so confused over everything) I am still shocked beyond belief.
After we broke up we went to my semi formal 3 weeks later and his prom a week after that. We were pretty friendly during that time and hooked up a couple times (oops) and I still held onto the notion that maybe there was hope for us after all.

After the prom, everything changed. I think we both stopped trying to be nice to each other, probably because the semi and prom were over. We stopped acknowledging each other in the halls and barely talked in the study we had together. Everything got incredibly weird between us. Some days are better than others. Sometimes we have great conversations with no nastiness and only friendly talk. Other days we both make mean comments.

So, my question is, what do I do about the summer? In some ways, I really want to get away from him. In others, I'd like to see him every so often. We have a lot of mutual friends so I doubt that I can avoid him entirely. I just don't really know how to handle dealing with him over the summer. I am also wondering how I should leave things with him before leaving school...

  • "I probably won't be seeing you for a while, so I hope you have a nice summer."
  • "It's too bad things turned out as badly as they did, I hope they get better for us."
  • "I won't be seeing you much but maybe we can hang out sometime."
    I don't know...it's hard to find the right words when dealing with him now. What should I do? Do you think that time apart over the summer might make a difference in our dealings with each other or we should spend some time together to make things right?

    I would really appreciate anything you guys could contribute. Thank you so much

    ------------------
    *Love always,
    VBallGrlie17*

    "I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way,that some poems don't rhyme and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next." ~Gilda Radner


    Posts: 28 | From: Mass. | Registered: Dec 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
  • BruinDan
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    Why not keep it simple and say something like, "I hope you have a great summer, take care of yourself." This way, you are not being overly gushy and not being overly cruel. You have set no ultimatums and made no demands, so you would be free to have it all off your chest and enjoy your summer.

    It's never fun when a relationship ends, but sometimes there isn't anything left to do. No stunts left to pull, no angles to try, simply no way to make things work out. (Like you, I have only recently found this out myself...) The best thing for you to do, in order to make things easier on you, would be to make sure you don't "hook up" (and please define that term next time, since it can mean different things to different people) with your ex anymore, and to make sure that you are keeping yourself busy with other friends. By amusing yourself with other people, and even spending some quality time alone, you are expanding your horizons and opening up your view of the world. And sometimes when that happens, the person of your dreams is right there before your eyes.

    You'll get through this okay, I promise. Take care...

    ------------------
    "Unit 12, 12D, 16A, 18S; respond to the fight in progress, weapons used are hands and feet. Suspect 1 is a male white with no arms or legs..."

    BruinDan's Blog!
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    Posts: 2727 | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
    short stuff
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    Hey sweetie!

    You know what... I was in a very similar situation. Anyway, I think it might be best if you stop and thing to yourself, "What do I really want from this guy?" "Is he worth my time and my friendship?" If you answer yes (along the lines) then maybe it would be best if you tried to keep in contact with him. If you answer no, then maybe it is time to move on with your life and find a new guy.

    It may be hard to give up and move on, trust me i know, but sometimes it is for the better.

    just remember to be honest to yourself and follow your heart. love is a tricky thing and it can be rewarding and hurtful. take care.

    ------------------
    (heart) always, torrance

    *so you stole my world, now i'm just a phony*
    *i need to know if you were real, i'd hate to think that i've been fooled again*


    Posts: 90 | From: seattle, washington, usa | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
    vballgrlie17
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    Member # 2080

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    Bruin Dan and Short Stuff...
    Thank you for your advice. Bruin Dan, I think that is a good idea, to just not make a big deal out of the fact that the school year has reached an end. I think it is probably a better idea to leave it open-ended, with no ultamatims...that way I can make up my mind later as to whether I want to see him or not right? Hopefully everything will turn out okay. I hope that someday we can be friends (or at least friendly) again. I don't want to lose him forever, after the months of love and (previous to that) months of friendship. So, thanks again

    ------------------
    *Love always,
    VBallGrlie17*

    "I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way,that some poems don't rhyme and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next." ~Gilda Radner


    Posts: 28 | From: Mass. | Registered: Dec 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
       

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