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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Jealousy?

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Author Topic: Jealousy?
CuriouS GeorgE
Member # 3136

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Hi everyone My boyfriend and I have been going out for about a year and a half and there's absolutely NOTHING he doesn't know about me. Even personal things I've never told ANYONE else before. I really love him with all my heart and I never want anyone else. I know that he also loves me more than anything, but sometimes I feel that I love him more than he loves me and he gets hurt by this. Sometimes I think it's just because I express more than he does. So sometimes I feel this way and I know that it's because I'm a very, very, VERY insecure person, about EVERYTHING!! I sometimes feel very suffocated because I feel like I'm becoming too attatched. What can I do when I feel this way? I don't mean to hurt him when I tell him I feel like he doesn't love me as much as I love him, it just comes out and I always feel bad after I say it. Is there something I should do or tell him so that I can not feel like this anymore? Should he say something to me?
Thanks guys!!

CuRioUs GeoRGe

Posts: 76 | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 3967

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I know exactly how you feel! I feel that way all the time with my boyfriend, I never told him though. Im insecure, because of my past. Im used to getting hurt by guys, so I expect it from my current boyfriend. Even though He's the best out of all the other guys I had a relationship with. I know he loves me, I just get scared sometimes.
Posts: 6 | From: state | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 2080

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Hi hun...

I know how you are feeling about feeling like you love him more than he loves you and worrying that you are becoming too attached. This also happened to me. My boyfriend and I went out for 6 months and after we broke up, I realized that I had loved him more than he loved me. I was so attached that it killed me (and still does) when we broke up.

My suggestion to you is to really take care of yourself. You said that you are pretty insecure about yourself. You also sound like you are really in love with him and very attached...Not that that is a bad thing, but I have found that it's very important to hold on to a piece of yourself. Don't allow yourself to get more and more attached. Do things that make you feel good, hang out with friends that you may have lost some connection with and do things away from him sometimes just to be with yourself.

It will come out just how much he loves you. But just be able to stand on your own two feet no matter what the outcome. I wish you all the best of luck!

*Love always,

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way,that some poems don't rhyme and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next." ~Gilda Radner

Posts: 28 | From: Mass. | Registered: Dec 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
CuriouS GeorgE
Member # 3136

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Thanks guys for your posts.
I don't know if I left you with the wrong impression but I do spend a lot of time with my friends and stuff like that. There's no problem there and it's not like I see my b/f every day because I don't. This feeling of me being too attatched only comes once in a while.
It's not like with every day I feel that I'm becoming more attatched in a bad way or anything. I'm happy the way our relationship is evolving, I just sometimes feel like I love him more than he loves me.
I also don't feel we're TOO attatched. I'm a very strong person and I let myself be heard. I'm not afraid of telling people what I think and if they can't handle the truth, then they shouldn't be around me. I do have a lot of friends and stuff though, it's not like I'm rude and mean, I'm just not afraid to tell people what's on my mind. It's not as if I've lost myself in him, I just want to know how to wipe out these feelings of "I love him more than he loves me" because in a way I know it's not true!

Posts: 76 | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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