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Author Topic: My boyfriend says he wants to get serious?
lilmo321
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I was with my boyfriend last night on Valentines day and we have been going out for about 2 months and he was like "so do you want this realationship to become serious?" What do you think he means by that? I thought we were allready serious????
Posts: 11 | Registered: Feb 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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Now, how are we supposed to know what serious means to your bloke?

The gig is, honey, that at this point of that conversation, it should go something like this:

Him: So, would you like this to get serious?
You: What do you mean by "serious?"

Sounds to me like it's high time the two of you spent some time talking about how you both define the relationship and where you see it right now. It's easier to do that when you're speaking the same language.

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Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

"If you're a bird, be an early early bird --
But if you're a worm, sleep late." - Shel Silverstein


Posts: 68237 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Hanne
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Or you could be a smart-aleck and ask him if he wants to discuss philosophy. That's pretty serious.

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Hanne Blank
Co-Editor, Scarleteen

Start a Revolution -- Stop Hating Your Body!


Posts: 1538 | From: boston, ma, USA | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
emsily0
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haha.

him: "i love you, honey. i think we should get...serious." (queue ominous music)
her: "sure, honey. what are your views on the situation in israel? let's talk about socrates. and what about neitsche? the time has come to talk about nuclear physics. i think we're ready."

hehe.

em

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Love is a word that is constantly heard
Hate is a word that is not.
Love, I am told, is more precious than gold.
Love, I have read, is hot.
But hate is the verb that to me is superb,
And love but a drug on the mart.
Any kiddie in school can love like a fool,
But hating, my boy, is an art.
-Ogden Nash


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lilmo321
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I asked him what do you mean by serious...when he said that n he was like do you think this realationship will go anywhere? N I was just lik...I i I i thought ........yes. lol I didnt understand, I thought the realationship was going somewhere.???
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Heather
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Here's the scoop: what a relationship is in two months is a FAR, far cry from what it might be in twenty years if it continued, no?

I mean, on the spectrum of "serious commitments," two months of dating is about as close to the low end as it gets. Perhaps he was aksing you if you wanted to decide to be monogamous, or perhaps he was asksing you what you goals for any relationship were some day, whatever.

But again, you just need to continue the conversation so you two can understand each other.

Maybe THAT's where you should tell him you want it to be going, eh?

------------------
Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

"If you're a bird, be an early early bird --
But if you're a worm, sleep late." - Shel Silverstein


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Lin
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Yep. I think Miz S is right.

Hon, you have to continue the conversation.

Discuss what plans the both of you have for this relationship. How far you want it to go. How serious you want it to be.

If there's something you are unsure about, you can't rely on asking us. Ask him. Coz it's your relationship and only he has all the answers and we don't know nuts about what going on and what he is thinking.

So go and have a nice long talk with him.


Posts: 2294 | From: Singapore | Registered: Dec 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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