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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Trouble keeping boyfriends because of body

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Author Topic: Trouble keeping boyfriends because of body
Dancypants
Neophyte
Member # 803

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Ok this is the thing: I am REALLY flat....like a 32AA, sometimes a 32A on a good day.....and everytime I get intimate with a guy and he sees my breasts, he breaks up with me, saying they "turn him off"....Now all you guys out there, do you think that breasts are important?And would you date a girl like me? Be honest!All advice welcome.
Posts: 7 | From: Ft. Wayne, IN | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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The trouble isn't your body, it is your attitude towards it, and the people you are choosing to date, flatly (no pun intended).

So the real question is: why do you keep choosing people who decide to be with someone based solely on sexual desire or on a body type?

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Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

"If you're a bird, be an early early bird --
But if you're a worm, sleep late." - Shel Silverstein


Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
ThisGuy
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That's sad - I truly pity those guys.

Look, your Dancypants-ness, dating someone who is prepared to dump you over something like that is pointless. Find someone who respects you for who you are, not how big a bra you can fill.

Personally I don't judge women based on the size of their mammary glands, or how much fatty tissue they carry round on their chest. I have zero respect for anyone who does.

The fault lies not with your cleavage, but with your choice of partner. Guess which one is easier to change, too!

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Ask not why dogs sniff each others butts...
Ask instead why you do not!


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StarryRedhead
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If someone ever broke up with me because he was not satisfied with my chest, I'd say he's the one with the problem, not me.

I know my body is not "perfect" (whatever that is) but usually the guys who get to see my body, are with me because they like me for who I am, not for my body alone. Don't settle for less. I think I said this to you before, but if someone likes you for everything you are.....they'll love what they see, because they'll love you, no matter what.

Any guy who says you're not beautiful because of a bra size is pretty shallow to begin with, seriously. I know you can find someone better, and you deserve someone better.

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}{*Starry Ali*}{
"You flicker. And you're beautiful. You glow inside my head. You hold me hypnotized, I'm mesmerized..."
My Webpage-Alisons Life


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Lin
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OKay sweetie, stop blaming yourself for it and don't lose any sleep over it coz these guys are not worth it. I am a 32AA, good day or not but do I care? No. Does my guy care? No.

And it's not like I've got a saint for a bf. These guys you are seeing are obviously immature and childish. If they cannot look beyong you bra cup size, they are not even worth knowing.

Love you body because if YOU don't, no one else can.


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BabyAngel84
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I'm a 34A....thats not quite as small as u but i was there once too....my guy is satisfyed with me..he's never said anything bout me being flat chested....i usually make fun of myself before anyone else gets the chance so it doesn't effect me....as much as erik would like some big boobs to "grab hold of" he's satisfyed with mine and hasn't ever made fun of me or made any comments about it.....and we've been together for 5mo. now....so if a guy dumps u cuz ur flat-chested hes a jerk and you shouldn't have been w/him in the 1st place cuz thats all they care about then, they should like you for who u are and what ur body looks like and if they can't deal then ur better off without them!!

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* No man/woman is worth your tears and the
only one who is, will never make you cry.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
If you love someone, put their name in a
circle, instead of a heart, because hearts can break,
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~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
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Posts: 161 | From: Kenosha, Wisconsin, USA | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
live4travel
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You've actually had guys dump you b/c they GOT to see your breasts, and then weren't satisfied? Ok, somethings not right there. I'm a guy, I had a g/f who had, B sized breasts, I didn't care what or how they felt. Why, because I wasn't in love with her body, I was in love with her. And in my own opinion, that's how it should work. You should love each other for who you are, not for what you have. Okay, you asked if we'd dump you for having a "flat" chest, no I wouldn't. Those guys sounded like players to me. Being "played on" is not right at all. Get yourself a guy that loves you and not just your body.

~josh~

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Want to know more about me? come see my little space in the Village People!
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surferChicka
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those guys are just losers anyway! i reaLLy dont know why you chOOse to go out with guys like that anyway! i'm a 32A myself, and my boy is satisfied. i constantly complain that i'm tOO smaLL and he doesn't care. he teLLs me that he'd rather have something he can handle rather than something fake and "always niPPy" (he watched a documentary about breast augmentation & found out the niPPles always stay erect after). you should be proud of what you have! i have to work on that department myself, but i'm geTTing there!

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peace, love, & seXwax!


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KiSsMEimSaRa13
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OK, i bet you've heard this a zillion times before, but Im a negative CCC, yah, beat that you 12 year olds!! I got VALLEYS PEOPLE!!! VALLEYS!!!! yah, and i've dated lotsa guys! Guys like that really piss me off! I mean, doubt they have the right to insult something you have no control over! it's your genetics, and they KNOW you cant do anything about it, cept stuffing, which is cheap, or surgery which is like sewing tupperware to your boobs. Every time a guy makes a crack about my chest I say, "WELL AT LEAST IM PROUD OF MY BODY AND WEAR TIGHT SHIRTS TO SHOW IT, AND I DON'T HIDE MY BODY PARTS UNDER SIZE EXTRA EXTRA EXTRA LARGE PANTS!" yAH, that doesn't always work, and it sounds sorta weird, but if they still bug me about it, i just kick them really hard. Always works.
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Heather
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Oh, that was absolutely precious. More power to you, girl.

------------------
Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

"If you're a bird, be an early early bird --
But if you're a worm, sleep late." - Shel Silverstein


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lemming
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We were having a discussion in Human Sexuality today which applies here:

If you're lucky enough to get to see it, for god's sake, don't COMPLAIN!

You deserve better, Miss Dancypants.

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~lemming, Scarleteen Advocate

want to know the inner lemming? read her diary at http://innerlemming.diaryland.com/.
Ike Ike Go Go Jump!


Posts: 3156 | From: Austin, Texas | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
SurfGal
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I have twice the problem sweetie. youd' think being overweight I'd at least get to have the big chest right? Nope, 38B here. On a good day maybe a C depends on the bra, and it looks about like an A b/c of the fatty tisuue in OTHER areas. As an afterthought, why should we let guys worry us about stuff like this? Every ex I have ever had has been pleased with what he did, or did not, get to see. Self Esteem is wonderful. I learned the hard way that if you feel good about yourself, others will see it, and respect you for it.

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"Girl you can pick a field full of daisies...but he'd still be my baby!" ~Dream

***STACY***


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Bears_wife
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Hi!
I think many woman face the same issue that our friend here is facing: We are very self-conscious about our bodies. Maybe even too much, and too much of something is not good at all. It's never ok to let your self image turn ick, and it's even worse if it affects your attitude. If a guy sees you, and sees that you are comfortable with your body, he'll be more turned on than if you tried to hide it. I'm chubby, have braces AND glasses, but I think I'm pretty. So does my boyfriend. As long as you find a man that will respect you, you'll do fine

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wmskick007
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Girl, don't worry about your breast size!! If guys are dumping you because you don't have large breasts, then somethings wrong!! You should go find a guy that doesn't exactly go for boobs and someone that goes for you. And only you and not your body. I mean its okay and all if he likes your body, but don't go out with someone if thats the only thing that they're going out with you for, k? Good luck!
Posts: 18 | From: Cartersville, GA, USA | Registered: Jan 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Moth
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Dancypants-

I hate to think of the shallowness of any guy or girl or human being who would dump someone just because their body did not live up to society's standards of beauty. Though you have no reason to trust my judgment, here it is- small breasts can be damnsexy. <g> If someone doesn't treat you with the respect and love you DESERVE because of your 32A chest, then I say you dump 'em before they dump you. I guarantee, there are males out there who love tiny breasts, or just don't care about breast size, and it's simply a matter of time until you find one.

-Moth


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Sandy
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I definitely agree with everything said here. It has happened to me before with some guy...and I thought of it as a problem. But then when he rejected me I realized he was a BIG LOSER! hey I dont flatter myself but I'm a pretty attractive girl, I might not have awesome breasts (34 A) but I do have a nice butt! So Im sure you have other virtues you can focus on and flaunt them (thats the secret). Even this guy who was "turned off" by your breasts may regret later what he said when he gets to know you better, and you show him you're really worth it. I wouldn't give up on him that fast if he keeps talking to you, guys are sometimes inmature like that. But if you stay cool and not make a big deal out of it they might change their minds and want you bad...that has also happened to me and now I love the guy! So just be confident, stay cool, and flaunt other parts!

~*peace*~


Posts: 30 | From: Tampa, FL | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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