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» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » My best friend is TOO SELF CENTERED!

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Author Topic: My best friend is TOO SELF CENTERED!
KimmyP
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I know this sounds like an awful thing to say, but sometimes, being around my best bud annoys the hell out of me! He thinks the world revolves around him. It isn't a MILD case either. EVERYTHING is HIM HIM HIM!

I love him dearly, but most of the time now, I can't stand to be around him for more than an hour or so, maybe even less when I've had a busy day.

Everybody, including all my friends and even my mom notices how he acts. We're really close and Im getting to the point where I feel like telling him off. I want to say *something* to him, not anything mean, but maybe something constructive, to make him aware.

A typical conversation: We'll be talking about something important like a research paper or credit card debt and he'll totally interupt with Does this Shirt look okay? or Don't you think this new hair color brings out my eyes? Or do you think that guy over there is checking me out? (he's gay)...continues interrupting every 5 minutes with something about himself.

Something like that everyonce in a while is okay, cause sometimes we need a little reassurance from friends. I think Y'all will get the picture here. Some advice would be greatly appreciated!

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Its ALL good :)


Posts: 54 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
moonbeam
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Oh my im in exactly the same situation, likeas much as (lets call her x) x is sometimes a good mate she is so selfish and self centred sometimes! she wont think about how you feel if its something x wants. and then gives the whole what did i do thing! i dont know what to give advice wiseas im as stuck is you i just can sympathize! luv moonbeam
Posts: 84 | From: Ireland.uk | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
starprincess
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Hey Kimmyp, Well it is kinda the postion i am in to! I mean my best friend is way self centered also and he is gay! And seriously, i am not sure how to respond to this. We got in a hugh fight about it and now i make him do all the work. I mean like if he wants to call me he can, if he wants to email me or talk to me he can. I am sure that this has nothing to do with your problem...but the main point is both of our best friends seem to be self centered. And half of the time i just ignore him because i get sick of it. If i was to ask him how i looked it would be like "fine, so what should I do this weekend?" It is always about him him him! So i understand. I hope that this helps you alittle..

starprincess


Posts: 5 | From: waxahachie, tx usa | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Pixie69
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Yeah, I can relate. On the one hand I have A. I've known her for like 10 years and she's so...just everything. Sometimes she can be cool but other times she'll go off on how her dad doesn't love her, no one likes her, and she may as well go stand on Freemont street (that's known for prostitutes) and get raped and then murdered. Or she should go hang herself or she should shoot herself or whatever she's in the mood to do that day. It drives me crazy because I can't bring up anything sad or bad because she'll turn around the topic so it's focused on her and end up crying.

She's so materialistic too. her closet is bulging, her five drawer dresser is stuffed and she's going to get another one so she can buy more stuff. She has sooo many clothes she's never worn that still have the tag on them. And she still doesn't think she has enough.

What do I do? Stop calling her until she's in a better mood. Not to be mean but she can be quite annoying. Oh yeah, and she constantly complains that she's fat. If she's fat then I'm a hippo. She's beuatiful and lucky and smart and talented but even if she is my best friend I'm not going to sit her and tell her that every day because she's having a bad day (her idea of a bad day: she falls in PE and her clothes are dirty, no one will take them home and wash them for her. A guy won't walk her to her locker and she had to take the bus home). Sometimes I just can't deal with her.

Whoosh, this was more than a vent than advice, just know you're know alone, eh?

brittany

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I'm the good girl that everyone thinks is a bad girl pretending to be a good girl :D


Posts: 1339 | From: Las Vegas, NV, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
ThisGuy
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I suppose some people aren't very secure in themselves.

Also, your gay friend might have "new car" syndrome - has he only recently come out, so to speak?

I'd say that if you decide to approach him on it, be very careful about it. Criticism from friends can be devastating.

Try to avoid phrases like: "you suck, you pathetic, arrogant, worthless pile of pig-scrotums!"

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You vil vear ze condoms, or ve vil use ze hot pokers!


Posts: 915 | From: Australia | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
KimmyP
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Well, He's definately got "new car" syndrome TIMES 1,000!!!!!
Is it possible to be extremely self-centered & have low-ish self esteem?

He's not completely "out", i mean, he's "out" to a lot of people, but he's till hiding it from co-workers, family, and family friends.

Its just really annoying EVERYTIME a half way decent guy walks by...or even an old dude, and he's like, he was checkin me out..he was lookin at me! Has it ever occured that they might just be friendly by making eye contact, or *GASP* even be looking at ME?!?!

This is really bothering me. Really Really Really bothering me. It makes me feel better that there are other people that are going thru the same thing as i am. Hang in there, everybody!

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Its ALL good :)
If you can't beat 'em, arrange to have them beaten.--George Carlin


Posts: 54 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Pixie69
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I'm on the phone right now with earlier said self centered friend and she's driving me crazy, I have to vent! We haven't talked for like, two weeks. Last week I walked to her house at 10 o'clock in the cold while I was very sick to return some stuff I borrowed because she "might feel like wearing it" So anyways, she calls me and she's like, "britt what'd you do this weekend" so I started telling her about a party and stuff and once I get the first sentance out she interrupts and tells me how she hooked up with three guys and all this other stuff. I know more about them then they probably know about themselves. Then she asks me again what I did and interupts again because she forgot a few details.

She's gone through this "I just want to hook up with guys and play with them" phase before she turned Christian and it didn't work out. And I'm trying to tell her it won't work out but she's just not listening and she's at a party with beer which is totally against what her church says. Plus she's always telling me "if I ever catch you drinking...you shouldn't hook up with guys..."

It's driving me crazy, it really is. Ooh, she's done telling about her day and is saying bye. That's sooo considerate eh? Sorry I had to vent.

Brittany

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I'm the good girl that everyone thinks is a bad girl pretending to be a good girl :D


Posts: 1339 | From: Las Vegas, NV, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
glitter695
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I have a friend who is self centered like Pixies friend. She moved aways from me(about an hour) so I dont get to see her that often, (I see her a few times a year) but when she calls its krazy, i'll tell her something about what happend somewhere or something, and then when i'm done, she'll say she did the same thing and try to make it 50 times better then the way I did it.

Once she called me and I wasnt home, she left a message and she told me to call her cuz it was about NSYNC (and at the time I LOVED NSYNC, i think it was a 1 year type thing, cuz im not into them as much, but neways) so I called her back and shes like HI GUESS WHAT? and Im like what? SHE LIKE I HAVE FRONT ROW TICKETS TO NSYNC. I was like NO WAY OMG (so excited) that she was gonna take me or something, right? WRONG I was like who are you taking, and she was like my friend Emma or whatever the hell her name was. And right then I wanted to go thru the damn phone and kick her in the face. I mean what kind of friend does that to you??

And a couple weeks after the concert, I call her just cuz, and I ask her how the concert was, and guess waht??? she didnt even go!!!! HAHA she couldnt get the tickets on time or whatever. Tell me that not RUDE AS HELL??

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*~*~*~I LOVE YOU BOB FOREVER AND ALWAYS*~*~*~
*~*~12/3/99*~*~*


Posts: 1978 | From: NY:) | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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