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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » SeX! sEx! SeX! sEx! SeX!

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Author Topic: SeX! sEx! SeX! sEx! SeX!
Member # 372

Icon 1 posted      Profile for d1TzY8     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
OK..if you cant tell...I have a slight problem. I totally LOVE sex! I have been going with my b/f for not even a month, and we have had sex. ITS ALLLLLL BECAUSE OF ME. And now I feel sooo bad.

Here's how it happened:

It was a Saturday night and I stayed the night at his house, not planning on doing ANYTHING out of the ordinary...(my b/f and I are like little 3rd graders..we have cute little slumber parties..LoL).

We took a time out of playing hide and go seek outside and it was cold so we were all huffing and puffing outside seeing who could make bigger breath marks in that air. After that we went in and he got a Coke and I got a Dr. Pepper. (I am Dr. Pepper's #1 fan!)

After awhile, he said he was still kinda thats when I said I could warm him up. I have tried SOOO hard to keep from being like that, but he just said the wrong thing at the wrong time, and BAM!...There we are having sex.

Afterwards, he told me that he wasnt that kind, to just start having sex like after a couple of weeks or whatever, and I felt SOOO bad, and he said it was OK...that if he didnt like me as much as he did, he would have sent me Everything is perfectly fine, and were closer than ever now, but I just feel bad.

...Me and my damn sex cravings..

What am i suppose to do? I like him SOOOO much, and who knows, maybe Im falling in love with him, but I ALWAYS want sex, and I dont want to pressure him. I cant break up...that wold be way shady, I just cant cause it would kill me.


Any suggestions?!

I know you might say..go with what your heart tells you, but it isnt helping at ALL.

I took his virginity away (But man oh man!! he was good!! ) I feel like WHITE TRASH or something..a slut..all that bad stuff.


Posts: 316 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 26

Icon 1 posted      Profile for entropie     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
All I can say is, he doesn't sound like the sort of guy who would do something he didn't want to..

[This message has been edited by entropie (edited 09-25-2002).]

Posts: 1030 | From: Aotearoa | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 353

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i swear if i didn't know any better i'd think you were one of my very best friends that lives in colorado.

a few months back, she had the EXACT situation!! how she handled it??? she continued having sex with the guy...LOL!

for real can't take it back and obviously it was meant to happen (cuz it did). my advice don't fret...he doesn't seem to regret it

~*GoDdEsS oF lOvE aNd BeAuTy*~

JaMeS & DoReEn 4eVeR

Posts: 269 | From: California | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 406

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Pixie69     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
If he likes you less because you had sex, well that's just not cool about him. But he COULD have said no and he COULD have stopped you if he wanted to. So I guess he has no control or he wanted to do it too. And it's shady of him to like you less because of it!

And you really shouldn't feel like a 'slut' or anything. There's nothing wrong with liking or even loving sex (unless it stops you from having a regular life) so don't fret so much. Okay? And you need to talk to him and make SURE what's going on because I don't think that he'd like you less or anything.


PS: that's so cute about the slumber parties! lol

I'm the good girl that everyone thinks is a bad girl pretending to be a good girl :D

Posts: 1339 | From: Las Vegas, NV, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 100

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Hanne     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Masturbating is a great way to have sexual pleasure without having intercourse. Masturbating with a partner can be really fun and avoids a lot of the potential fallout of having other kinds of sex (STDs, pregnancy, etc.).

Often when we find ourselves having sex a *lot*, even if we enjoy it, it's not really sex we're after -- attention, being touched, feeling important, or other things. It's useful to think about what's going on here, because I get the impression that you're not so comfortable with the fact that you're having as much sex as you're having right now. You need to seriously think about why you are uncomfortable, and what you really want and like about having sex.

P.S. I hope you're practicing safer sex, every time you have sex. Condoms, condoms, condoms. Remember that each time you have sex, you are at risk for pregnancy and STDs, and it is up to you to decrease your risk as much as possible so that you don't have to live with the consequences.

Hanne Blank
Co-Editor, Scarleteen

Start a Revolution -- Stop Hating Your Body!

Posts: 1538 | From: boston, ma, USA | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 1515

Icon 1 posted      Profile for glitter695     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
If your HEART is really into this guy and his HEART is really into yours you will do the right thing, you will wait until hes ready, my baby love waited till i was ready..he asked bout having sex a few times but not ALL the time, then on out 6 months i told him i was ready, he waited for me...just for me..that makes somebody feel so special...were still lovin eachother more than anything and its been 10 months, sex shouldnt take over your life, and your RELATIONSHIP shouldnt be base on sex, love is more then is also respect and lots of other things...hope this helped


Posts: 1978 | From: NY:) | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I think it's important here not to make judegment calls. Sex can be okay, healthy and just fine when it isn't about love or a romantic relationship. It's very important that we make that distinction, otherwise we risk assuming that the "best" sex is about love, which varies from person to person and relationship to relationship.

I agree with Hanne in that we should recognize that when we're really grooving on sex with others to the point that it feels like an insatiable hunger, it probably has more to do with attention and companionship than the physical aspect of sex. because this person said he 'wasn't the sort" to jump into a sexual relationship honestly doesn't mean much. Most people say that simply because they haven't been that 'sort" before.

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 1194

Icon 1 posted      Profile for lilnerd     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
he doesn't seem to regret having sex so you have nothing to feel guilty about. If he had said 'I wish we hadn't done it so soon' or something of the nature that would be a different story. (BTW if he did suggest something like that there's no problem with NOT having sex again, right??) Or...just enjoy yourself and be safe, because it seems like you've sorta created the problem in your head. Hey! If he didn't wanna I don't think he would have a problem letting you know.
Posts: 543 | From: NY | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 558

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Don't worry about it, I know thats easier said than done but it's done now and he sounds like the kinda guy who would tell you that it bothered him. I can't talk from experience though because i'm still a virgin and well i wouldn't say i'm scared of sex, but if I meet a girl and when we get to the sex part its gonna be a little scary for but i guess it allways is on the first time.

If you are still troubled by it why don't ya talk to him about it ask him how he feels about it now?
You're both very lucky to have each other

Posts: 118 | From: United Kingdom | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 607

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Don't beat yourself up after this! This guy is obviously not upset about what happened, be easy on yourself. It's NOT your fault it happened, he was there too and is not regretting having sex with you.

I have a tendency, not to be easy, but to be VERY sexually open. I have had 3, count em', 3 one night stands. Something I never was proud of until I met my current love. We met, talked about mutual thing you know, we had sex....this was the VERY FIRST day we met. I felt guilty at first, I was the one who wanted him to "get it on" with me, but it actually turned into something very wonderful because we still had a deep connection. Our hormones just got in touch before our hearts did. At first I felt like all we were was sex, but it grew naturally, now I'm perfectly content just laying in his arms without having sex.

Try to talk to him about it, what you're feeling, be open, openness can be a beautiful thing. You're not a bad person for wanting to have sex! And also remember safe sex is GOOD!

}{*Starry Ali*}{

"It's a narrow margin, just room enough for regret, in the inch and a half between, "Hey, how ya been?" and "Can I kiss you yet?"

~Alisons Life~

Posts: 367 | From: NY, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 1524

Icon 1 posted      Profile for U2girl     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
You know i could honestly say your not the only girl out there with that issue.. beleive me i have a hard time.. my boyfriend and i did the EXACT same thing.. we didnt even wait a month but it is like we were so sttracted to eachother in every way we both couldnt even handle it.. u know.. dont feel bad about it.. but if u wanna know how ur boyfriend feels about all this talk to him about it okay? it might make u feel better.


Posts: 111 | From: Toronto, ont,canada | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 372

Icon 1 posted      Profile for d1TzY8     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
EVERYTHING is totally cool! Were not only b/f and g/f but BEST friends! Stuff only I would ONLY tell my other girl friends, i would rather tell him now and vice versa.

My parents think we spend too much time together, but I just cant help it...we will have our 1 month anniversary on October 11th!!! (Just a couple days away!!) And I am more excited than ever!

How lots of couples go to the movies, and all the usual and Matt do stuff that we none of our other friends want to do w/ us...for instance, since his friends wouldnt go hiking in the "haunted woods" (inside joke..LoL) w/ him...i did..LoL. Since my friends wouldnt watch the Iron Giant w/ me..he fixed me a gourmet meal (well ....he REALLLY tried!! ) and I chilled at his house and we watched it!!

I love him sooo much!! And Im SOO happy that I found someone to share my feelings with!

I am going to try REALLLLLLLLY hard NOT to think about having sex that day, I am gonna try to think of something to take my mind off it..

...Unless he says else wise!

You guys are the best, and Im so glad that you're here to help!!!!!

Posts: 316 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 1764

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Shygurl     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hay wat's up everybody? Ok this is what i gather from the situation. Fot a lot of people i know (myself include feel like once they've had sex it's ok to keep having it as long as its with that special person. I mean its not like he's a virgin ot anything, its not like he's holding onto that, you mentioned that you and your boyfriend are like "little third graders" right?? Well the vibe that i get from that is that ya'll act like buddies/pals towards eachother, (of course with the exception of having sex!) Well maybe he feels awkward since he looks at you as his buddy, somebody he can joke with (that's the way me and my guy are)There's always the possibilty that he's gay?? Whatever the situation, be happy that you have a guy that respects you and himself enough to restrain.
Posts: 47 | From: BFE | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 1767

Icon 1 posted      Profile for starprincess     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
well i have to say this.....i am KINDA the same way.....i lost my virginity back in april...and it feels like i want it all the time....but what i do is just stay away from it....i mean i know it is hard having a boyfriend and all....but it is the best (but yet worse) thing i can do..I am sorry if i am not much help


Posts: 5 | From: waxahachie, tx usa | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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