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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Emergencies and Crises » Scared to take the pregnancy test

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Author Topic: Scared to take the pregnancy test
seashorex100
Neophyte
Member # 110790

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So about 3 weeks ago I posted my situation on the pregnancy scare thread. My boyfriend rubbed his bare penis in between my butt cheeks and moved up and down around my anus with no ejaculation and he did not move it near my genital area. Immediately I started freaking out because I felt like there could've been some chance of a pregnancy risk. I got my period a week ago although it seemed different. I had no cramps and the flow got very light towards the end but the first few days I was able to fill a tampon and pad. I thought I was okay until I noticed some pink tint in my discharge 2 days after my period ended and I threw up the other night and have been feeling weirdly crummy. I can't tell if it was a stomach bug or not. I'm gonna take a pregnancy test but I am so paralyzed with fear. I'm petrified of what it's going to say and I need someone to talk to. I'm gonna take it this weekend but I'm so nervous that I'm making myself so stressed and sick. What do I do?

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:)

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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How about calling a friend and asking them to go get and take the test with you, and give you emotional support?

We can certainly talk to you and help with anything you need after the results of the test, even though it seems pretty clear those results will be negative. But it sounds like you would probably feel a lot better with some in-person support right now.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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seashorex100
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Member # 110790

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My boyfriend is extremely supportive and he has told me 100 times that there is no way I could be pregnant. He is getting me the test too. I've read that people have gotten their periods but still we're pregnant is this true or am I interpreting it wrong?

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:)

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Heather
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Chances are you did not read that in credible places like medical literature. Sometimes people do experience vaginal bleeding with pregnancy they confuse with a period, but what is most common, by a serious long shot, is for people to get their first clue they are pregnant - when they are - because they missed a period.

But of course, a test is the way to find out for sure.

Do you feel like your boyfriend saying those things to you supports you right now? I ask because for a lot of people, what support around a scare like this really looks like is someone taking more about your feelings, and validating those feelings, even if they are stemming from an unrealistic fear. Since he is obviously part of this, another way he could probably give you good support here is by you two talking about how you clearly do not feel ready for this stuff, and then making some new agreements and limits about your sexual activities moving forward to be sure they are only things you feel 300% good about and ready for.

You also came here saying you need someone to talk to, so it sounds like your boyfriend is not filling that need, and he may not be able to. Again, how about getting in touch with a friend, someone who is not also part of this situation like he is?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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seashorex100
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I think I was really upset because I wasn't comfortable with what he did. We spoke about it and we're on the same page. I'm a little scared to tell a friend because I'm nervous they might judge me. Do you think any of the symptoms I mentioned means I'm pregnant?
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Symptoms of pregnancy are only something someone who is, in fact, pregnant can have. And even then, sometimes things like nausea or spotting are not even due to pregnancy in the first place, but about things like having a flu or a genital infection.

You want to know your pregnancy status and your period alone is not convincing you, you just gotta take a test. That is what we need to do if we want to find out about our pregnancy status.

And it sounds like another next step, if you truly do not have any friends right now you can trust to be supportive with things like this, is to invest some time and energy in making new friendships! Or maybe in giving one or two of your current friends a chance to be supportive by taking the positive risk of asking for support like this.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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