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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Emergencies and Crises » scared, crying all day

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Author Topic: scared, crying all day
SataG
Neophyte
Member # 110882

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Hi, Im truly scared out of my mind, I cry all day cause I think I might be pregnant. I'm actually crying right now. Please can someone tell me if I could be pregnant if a guy had precum on his hand and wiped it off 2 things and peed before that. Ive read many all of your articles and it just doesn't make me stop worrying , I cant talk to my boyfriend about this cause all he does is cuss me out and tells me to shutup. Plus this all happened a day before my ovulation date , and I have sore nipples and my boobs are getting bigger. I just turned 15 I don't know if this is puberty or not. My mom asks me everyday if I got my period and she knows something shady is happening. Can someone please stop answer me and not give me a link. I need someone to tell me if I could be pregnant. I'm also having creamy discharge.
Posts: 7 | From: New Mexico | Registered: Jul 2014  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Sata, can I suggest that chances are good some of how you are feeling is due to being in a relationship you seem to be saying is verbally and emotionally abusive? If you would like to talk about that, and how to change that part of your life so you can feel better, please know we are willing to help.

Being in abuse also sure makes pregnancy scares feel a lot scarier, and also usually involves sex a person being abused does not want, feel ready for, or feel okay about.

Since it sounds like you have already read the pieces that explain pregnancy and infection risks, I am guessing you already know that what you are describing here is not at all likely to pose any real risk of pregnancy. You might also already know that breast changes like you are describing do not even happen in very early pregnancy in the first place.

I am betting that most of this upset has to do with your relationship and how scary that sounds most of all, so again, if you want to talk about getting away from that, or how to ask people like your Mom for help and support there, I think we may be able to start turning around how you have been feeling.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
SataG
Neophyte
Member # 110882

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Yes, it's scary having nobody to talk to. I'm kind of alone. My mom is extremely nice , she loves me with all her heart and she does not judge what so ever, I have one of the best relationships with my mother and dissapointing her literally makes me want to cringe. I can't talk to my boyfriend , I do love him alot , but it's hard to leave, he's the only one I talk to , I have no one else. When I get home from being out all day I only talk to him , vice versa. So this doesn't pose any risk? It was a day before my ovulation date too , doesn't that mean I could be pregnant. All he did was get precum on his finger then wiped it on a wall then his shorts, but that was with his right hand and he rubbed my vulva with his left which had no precum on it. I just wanted to know if I did get any precum on my vulva would I be at risk of pregnancy? Thank you so much for talking to you. I really have nobody right at this moment. Thank you so much, I literally love your site, this site is a true blessing to me. Thank you
Posts: 7 | From: New Mexico | Registered: Jul 2014  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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I understand.

You know, it sounds like telling your Mom how your boyfriend treats you would be the best thing to do. You seem firm in knowing she cares about you, and if you need help getting out of something abusive, including the social isolation that is usually part and parcel of that (both per making you more vulnerable to abuse and part of what keeps you feeling stuck in it), asking someone you trust and know cares about you is always the best first step.

And asking her for big help like this when you are in danger, as anyone in abuse is? I can assure you someone who cares will not be disappointed. What would usually make them feel heartbroken is if you did NOT ask for that help. We always want to help the people we love when they need it, after all, and want to do whatever we can to keep them from harm.

If fluids from someone's penis come into contact with your genitals, then yes, there are then possible risks or infections and pregnancy. However, as you know from reading and previous conversations with us, when that contact is indirect like you are describing, that does not really change the infection risks, but it does make pregnancy a very unlikely issue.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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I understand.

You know, it sounds like telling your Mom how your boyfriend treats you would be the best thing to do. You seem firm in knowing she cares about you, and if you need help getting out of something abusive, including the social isolation that is usually part and parcel of that (both per making you more vulnerable to abuse and part of what keeps you feeling stuck in it), asking someone you trust and know cares about you is always the best first step.

And asking her for big help like this when you are in danger, as anyone in abuse is? I can assure you someone who cares will not be disappointed. What would usually make them feel heartbroken is if you did NOT ask for that help. We always want to help the people we love when they need it, after all, and want to do whatever we can to keep them from harm.

If fluids from someone's penis come into contact with your genitals, then yes, there are then possible risks or infections and pregnancy. However, as you know from reading and previous conversations with us, when that contact is indirect like you are describing, that does not really change the infection risks, but it does make pregnancy a very unlikely issue.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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SataG
Neophyte
Member # 110882

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Okay, so there's no risk. I'm still freaking out. What if I'm that one person that is pregnant from this kind of sexual activity. I don't track my period but idk when its supposed to come, I'm dont my cycle length but I'm pretty regular, last month I got either on the 27th or 28th , I'm just so scared. Plus my mom is pregnant and her period throws mine off, do you think I should take a test. I'm afraid to test cause I'm afraid I will be pregnant.
Posts: 7 | From: New Mexico | Registered: Jul 2014  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
SataG
Neophyte
Member # 110882

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Can someone please answer me, my period has not come yet and I'm freaking cause it's the end of the month.
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SataG
Neophyte
Member # 110882

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Can someone please answer me, my period has not come yet and I'm freaking cause it's the end of the month.
Posts: 7 | From: New Mexico | Registered: Jul 2014  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Sata, apologies for the wait. We are very short-staffed in general, especially on the weekends.

Here's the thing: a pregnancy test doesn't change anything. It doesn't make someone pregnant who is not with a positive result, or make someone not pregnant who is with a negative result. It just tells you what the reality is.

And if and when someone is pregnant, avoiding a test won't make a pregnancy go away. Rather, the longer someone waits to find out if they are pregnant, the fewer options they have with it, or the tougher accessing some of those options gets.

Again, you're 15. It sounds like you are in abuse. And it also sounds like you have a wonderful parent who cares a lot about you. I just can't encourage you enough to reach out to that person. Not everyone has a caring parent, or is in a situation where turning things around will probably be a pretty minor challenge. You do, and since you're young and don't live with this person (your boyfriend), getting out of this will be a lot easier now, and with that caring help, than it is for others, or will be the longer you go without asking for help.

So, my best advice is to take that test so you can deal with this: ask your Mom to be with you if you'd feel better with support. Get STI tested soon, while you're at it. Then tell your Mom what has been going on, and ask for the help that it sounds pretty sure, she would very much want to give you.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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