Donate Now
We've Moved! Check out our new boards.
  
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Emergencies and Crises » Please help...

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Please help...
Jack77
Neophyte
Member # 107248

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Jack77     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
my gf and i did some mutual masturbation and dry sex on the 20 of march. no direct contact, intercourse nor ejaculation. when i was on top of her, my penis was held against my waist by my waist band and the tip was showing. she had her underwear and jeans on but unzipped. some precum might have gone on or in her jeans or underwear. i fingered her after so i am worried if she could get pregnant from that. my finger might had made contact with the possible precum or i might have fingered it in. we did it outdoor and the weather was roughly -5 degress celsius. her period is due but she said she doesnt feel like its coming. her last period was end of february and the one before was the 25 of january. im rly worried. is it possible for her to be pregnant? if not, what could be some possible reasons for her delayed period? also, she had cramps a couple hours before we did it on the 20, if that helps.
Posts: 11 | From: vancouver | Registered: Apr 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Nicholas Chan
Volunteer-in-training
Member # 106973

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Nicholas Chan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hey Jack,

I see this is your first post here at Scarleteen, so welcome!

Before your worries go any further, I think it's important you properly assess whether your sexual activity that day actually posed a viable pregnancy risk.


These helpful articles will help you do just that, and give you the other answers you were looking for too:

Pregnancy Scared?

M.I.A or, Dude, Where's My Period?

If you then still have any other questions, please feel free ask [Smile]

--------------------
"Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared."
-Buddha

Posts: 9 | From: Singapore | Registered: Mar 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Jack77
Neophyte
Member # 107248

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Jack77     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hi Nicholas,

Thank you for replying
what we did tht day was mentioned above.
i did not touch my part and she did not touch hers after touching mine.
rite now im just curious if there could be a possible pregnancy risk if precum rlly did got on or in her underwear and i fingered it in.

Posts: 11 | From: vancouver | Registered: Apr 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Did you notice, Jack, how that pregnancy Scared piece talked about the need for DIRECT contact, not something like from your hands or through clothing?

Mind, moving forward? We always want to wash our hands before we touch someone's genitals, just like we always want to wash our hands before eating. That's really about germs and infections, though, not pregnancy, but moving forward, if handwashing isn't part of your habits before fingering, I'd advise changing that. An extra bonus is then you don't even have to worry about things like this is the first place AND you can also help your girlfriend prevent urinary tract or bacterial infections, which are no fun at all to have.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Jack77
Neophyte
Member # 107248

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Jack77     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hi Heather,

Thank you for this really helpful advice.
i will for sure do that in the future.
so just to make it clear,
even if i had made contact with the possible precum on her clothing then fingered her
or fingered in the possible precum around her vaginal area
there would not be a risk of pregnancy?

Posts: 11 | From: vancouver | Registered: Apr 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
As stated in all the pieces we have about pregnancy risks on the site here, when there are likely pregnancy risks it is when:
There has been DIRECT genital-to-genital contact between someone with a penis and someone with a vulva and/or
There has been DIRECT contact between semen and the genitals of someone with a vulva.

We can't say something like indirect contact between, say a hand full of fresh semen and a naked vulva does not pose risks, because every now and then, with the right timing, it might. But it would be unlikely enough that we can say that if you're going to worry about that, you should also be worrying a lot about things like being struck by lightening, which probably happen *more* often, you know?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Jack77
Neophyte
Member # 107248

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Jack77     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Thank you Heather,
this really cleared up my mind alot,
really needed someone to tell me that.
also im just wondering,
would precum be considered as semen?

Posts: 11 | From: vancouver | Registered: Apr 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Pre-ejaculate is in such small amounts that if you were to have direct contact between pre-ejaculate and a partners genitals, we can be sure you were ALSO having direct genital-to-genital contact.

So, again, are we talking about any DIRECT contact? I think it's already been established that that's not what happened with you, so the discussion of a potential pregnancy isn't sound, just like, say, discussing someone having food poisoning who hadn't eaten anything wouldn't be, if you follow me.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Jack77
Neophyte
Member # 107248

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Jack77     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
no there wasnt any direct contact. so what youre saying is, precum is in such small amount that its not possible to get to the vaginal area unless direct contact is involved? so its not possible for precum to flow down her body into her vaginal or leak through her thin layer of underwear?
also one last question,
i have read through the article of late period on this site but im still curious,
the day we did those stuff was roughly the 21 day of her cycle, so theres a big chance that she already had her ovulation. she apparently doesnt feel that her period is coming anytime soon. What are some possible reasons for that? could stress be involved? cuz from what ive read, stress delays ovulation. could it also delay period after ovulation has happened?

Posts: 11 | From: vancouver | Registered: Apr 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Pre-ejaculate is just a few drops of fluid.

Take a few drops of water, just a few drops, and put it on your belly: see if it makes it to under your testicles.

You'll see that it doesn't: it can't.

No one can make predictions or remotely accurate guesses about when someone is most or least fertile with only the dates of someone's period. To do that, we'd need daily charting of cervical mucus and/or her basal temperatures for a couple months at a minimum.

Nick already gave you a link up there for the reasons periods can be late, even though it doesn't sound like hers is yet. Were you able to read it to see all of what those are?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Jack77
Neophyte
Member # 107248

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Jack77     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Yeup
thank you so much for your help
made me feel alot more relieved now
i will be sure to use your advice next time and also be more careful
i really appreciate it
Thank you

Posts: 11 | From: vancouver | Registered: Apr 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
You're welcome. [Smile]

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3