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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Emergencies and Crises » *is scared*

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Author Topic: *is scared*
kathie
Neophyte
Member # 13007

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Last week, I touched my boyfriend as he came and then, without thinking, touched myself. I came home and scrubbed myself, everywhere with everything I could find. If I washed my hands (like for hours) could there possibly be live sperm on them? And today I got my period - I think - but if it's really my period, then it's early by almost two weeks. On the other hand, I've been dieting alot and lost my period, and I just started eating again yesterday. Is it possible that he somehow hurt me down there, and I'm bleeding, and if so, would it hurt (I saw him last night)? Finally, I'm not on the Pill, but I want to be. Where do you get it? Could I get it without my parents knowing (I can't drive)?

Thanks... I'm so scared... *cries*


Posts: 12 | Registered: May 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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I would suggest that your not eating is likely the cause of the irregularities rather than the sexual incident. I don't know what you did last night, so I can't say if you could be bleeding from an abrasion or such. "Seeing" someone doesn't really give us much information to work with, luv.

However, you did have a pregnancy and an STD and STI risk, so you will have to deal with that (testing for the latter soon, both of you, and if your period remains funky, a pregnancy test).

As far as the pill goes (and again, please understand that only deals with birth control -- STI transmission is MUCH more common than pregnancy, so safer sex mmeasures and tools are also something you need), you can see your own gynecologist or go to a clinic like Planned Parenthood for an exam and to obtain the pill/a presctiption for the pill, should it be a good method for you.

Might want to take a look at this first, however: Ready or Not? –The Readiness Checklist

------------------
Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

My epitaph should read: "She worked herself into this ground."
-- Kay Bailey Hutchinson


Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Lastly, please do what you need to for yourself to fix your disordered eating.

"Not eating" is not a diet. And a diet for the purpose of losing weight should only be entered into on the advice of a doctor.

------------------
Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

My epitaph should read: "She worked herself into this ground."
-- Kay Bailey Hutchinson


Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
kathie
Neophyte
Member # 13007

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Thanks, I know my eating problem is wrong, but I heard that if I'm pregnant, then starving myself kills the baby, and things are taken care of... *cringes* Don't attack me on that one, I come from a very up-tight family, and becasue (accoridng to them) there would never be any reason for me to need, say, birth control, or an STD check, and therfore I've never been to the gyno, or anything like that. And as far as becoming pregnant, to them that just isn't an option. But I feel that I should live by my own morals... So if I sperm on my hands, but washed my hands, are they clean? If not, what can I do?
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kathie
Neophyte
Member # 13007

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In addition, what kind of birth control can I get at, say, Kroger's? There is simply no one I can ask to take me to Planned Parenthood.
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lemming
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 33

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I won't "attack" you, but the idea that starving yourself would cause a miscarriage is just plain wrong. For that to happen, you'd have to be dangerously close to death yourself.

You can buy condoms and lubricants at any grocery or drugstore. Hormonal contraceptives (like birth control pills or emergency contraceptives) are not available without a doctor's prescription.

As for the gynecologist question, we feel that everyone should start getting yearly checkups (pelvic exam, Pap smear, and the like) when they begin menstruating. It's just part of taking care of yourself, and has nothing to do with whether or not you're sexually active. If you present it to your parents this way, they may be more willing to take you to the doctor.

And finally, if there is no way that you can deal with an unintended pregnancy, perhaps it's time for you to reconsider your readiness for sexual activity. Check this out: Ready or Not? –The Readiness Checklist.

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Laurel Lemming
Scarleteen Advocate

"Maypole/The ties that bind you will unwind/To free me one day/And everything decays..." - XTC, "The Wheel and the Maypole"


Posts: 3156 | From: Austin, Texas | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
logic_grrl
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 8067

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quote:
I heard that if I'm pregnant, then starving myself kills the baby, and things are taken care of...

Nope. It might malnourish the fetus, possibly causing disabilities, but it's not necessarily going to cause a miscarriage. And like other methods of DIY abortions you may have heard of, it could only damage the fetus by damaging you as well. Not a good move.

quote:
I come from a very up-tight family, and becasue (accoridng to them) there would never be any reason for me to need, say, birth control, or an STD check, and therfore I've never been to the gyno, or anything like that.

You might want to explain to them that any girl or woman should have regular gyn check-ups once they've started menstruating, whether they're sexually active or not.

quote:
So if I sperm on my hands, but washed my hands, are they clean?

Yes, washing your hands with soap and water will effectively remove sperm.

If you're looking for a method of birth control that you can get at any drugstore, how about condoms? And they provide STD protection, too ...

However, like all methods of contraception, they are not 100% effective.

And part of being ready to be sexually active is having access to the resources to handle it if things go wrong - for example, being able to get emergency contraception if you need it, or get access to a safe legal medical abortion if you make that choice.

Check out:

Ready or Not? –The Readiness Checklist

{Mindmeld!}

[This message has been edited by logic_grrl (edited 05-11-2003).]


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kathie
Neophyte
Member # 13007

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Thanks so much for your quick reply and your help. I only have one more question and then I will be calmed down enough to study.

How can I kill sperm on my hands, and how long do they last? If I get sperm on my hands, what precautions do I need to take?

Again, I know I'm taking an immense amount of your time, more than I really deserve, and thanks for helping so much already.


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kathie
Neophyte
Member # 13007

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Thanks so much. I don't really know what to say, but thank you. I feel much better.

Thanks.


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Ashy
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 4764

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Sperm can last about twenty minutes in an unfriendly enviroment (like on your hands). If you get ejaculate on your hands, or any other bodily fluid, it's best to wash your hands with soap and water.

We don't think you're taking up too much of our time. We want all of our users to learn from our site to make good decisions. Try reading the link logic_grrl suggested, as well as a few others:
Safer Sex... For Your Heart
Safe, Sound & Sexy ? A Safer Sex How-To


Posts: 1784 | From: USA | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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