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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Ask Scarleteen » Please HELP : Pregnancy and family negativity

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Author Topic: Please HELP : Pregnancy and family negativity
BreakingSilence
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Member # 38098

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I'm expecting a baby a month after my cousin is, and everyone in my family acts like I'm "ruining it" for her. I'm somehow "taking all the attention" from her when in reality I don't feel anything has changed. My cousin Liz has always had life handed to her, and when it comes to me everything is total opposite. Everything always has to be perfect for Liz and all about her and it honestly hurts me that I've been told that it's unfair to her that I'm pregnant. For all I care I can stay away from everyone and hope she would be happy. I'm constantly compared to her . She's married and I'm not, She looks more pregnant than I do, her baby's room is getting this and mine won't have it. Just ridiculous things! Everyone is acting like children and I'm so sick of it. I just need to vent. I get looked down on because of all these reasons, and I'm told " you're too skinny! Are you eating?" and a bunch of other really hurtful comments. I just can't take it anymore. Liz is older than me and she is so upset that she's not having a girl. I am forced to almost feel guilty because I'm having a girl, I'm getting "everything" I want. You and I both know from the past that things rarely go my way. I just feel like I can't even be happy because my family is so selfish and does nothing but look down on me. I'm taking away her "glory" and "raining on her parade". Clearly more people than just me are pregnant right now, but because I happen to be related its so " terrible". I got what she wanted, so now I'm awful? I "always" get my way? Really? now I know that's not true [Frown]

I want to be happy. I'm happy with my life right now. What's so wrong with me being happy for once? Why can't I be? I just can't win.

Can you please delete this section above once the question is read? I just didn't want anyone to find it. Thanks so much [Smile]

[ 03-09-2014, 05:22 PM: Message edited by: BreakingSilence ]

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Sometimes the only thing we can do is accept what we have no control over.

Posts: 313 | From: :) | Registered: Apr 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Edith_*
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 107716

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Hey there, BreakingSilence!

I'm sorry you are having such a hard time with all of this. [Frown]

I know that most of times you talk with Heather so I want to make sure if that's what you want to do this time? If so, Heather won't be around for the day but I am pretty sure tomorrow as soon as she comes back she will be able to answer to this post. Are you okay leaving this post as is so she can read it? Or, are you okay with talking with other volunteers for now? Is chat a better option for you right now to talk?

I hope I am not asking too many questions, I just want to make sure we serve you as better as we can and as much as you deserve. [Smile]

[ 03-09-2014, 06:17 PM: Message edited by: Edith_* ]

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"Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it's very important that you do it " (...'cause no one else will) -Gandhi-

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BreakingSilence
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Member # 38098

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Hello,
Either way is fine, but sure! I do really you responding. What is the chat option compared to message? Sorry I'm confused . You aren't asking too many questions , don't worry [Smile] thanks again

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Sometimes the only thing we can do is accept what we have no control over.

Posts: 313 | From: :) | Registered: Apr 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
BreakingSilence
Activist
Member # 38098

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Appreciate *

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Sometimes the only thing we can do is accept what we have no control over.

Posts: 313 | From: :) | Registered: Apr 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Redskies
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 79774

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We do ask users not to post things on the boards that they don't want to stay public, and not to include identifying details. We will move threads to our private view only, when a user feels earnestly endangered if it remained public.

We can offer you two things: either 1) we can discuss your original post with you in this thread and all of the thread will remain publicly viewable on the boards, or 2) if you feel earnestly endangered by the information you've posted here, we can cease the discussion and move the thread to the locked, private area.

If 2) applies, you do have the option of using our chat service, where your conversation will not be visible to the general public. You can see more information and a link to the chat service on this page: http://www.scarleteen.com/need_help_now_a_guide_to_scarleteens_direct_services .

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The kyriarchy usually assumes that I am the kind of woman of whom it would approve. I have a peculiar kind of fun showing it just how much I am not.

Posts: 1786 | From: Europe | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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