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Author Topic: Condom leakage question.
its2014
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First of all I just want to thank all the moderators on this forum for your help.

I had sex with my boyfriend last night and we used condom but I am freaking out because after he came he didn't pull out his penis right away(he was in there for about 3 mins). There were semen very close to the base/rim of the condom and almost seeping/seeped out of it.

Is it possible for semen to leak out of the base of the condom? He said he didn't leave any room on the tip to collect the semen and the condom was folding up/sliding when he was inside me.

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Heather
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So, am I understanding correctly that he told you he did not put the condom on properly, in that he did not pinch and hold the tip while putting it on to leave a place for his ejaculate to collect?

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its2014
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Yes he said he didn't pinch the tip.

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Heather
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Okay.

So, given that the condom wasn't used properly, and it seems you may be looking at a failure, my advice if you do not want or intend to become pregnant soon is to consider getting and using emergency contraception.

Ultimately, this is one of those things where just not being there and seeing exactly what happened, we just can't know for sure. But we do know the condom wasn't used properly, and it sounds like, at the least, that effected the way the condom performed. So, for that reason alone, in a situation like this, I'd consider it figuring that the condom may not have been something on which you could rely.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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its2014
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I thought if a condom doesn't slip off or break it's not consider a condom failure?

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Sam W
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Even if the condom did not do anything that is the most common cause of failure (breaking, coming off), the fact that it was not used correctly decreased it's effectiveness. And, like Heather said, since we weren't there and can't say for certain what happened, we are airing on the side of caution in our advice.
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its2014
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So you are saying that there is a possibility that the condom leaked even thought it was still on his penis when it withdrew? I am just trying to get an understanding, because I read on here that if a condom didn't slip-off or break, no need to worry about pregnancy.

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Heather
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Here's what I'm saying:

The condom was not used properly. Room was not left in the tip AND your partner did not withdraw right after ejaculating. Those are two ways it was not used properly.

Like I said, I was not there, so I can't know where exactly his ejaculate went, but then it can't go into the tip, it has got to go somewhere. Often, that'll result in a break, which does not seem to have happened here. But what I simply cannot know without having literally watched this whole situation from start to finish is where it DID go, save that you seem to be describing it seeping out over the base.

That all given, I personally would suggest EC for someone who wanted to reduce a possibly higher risk of pregnancy that you will have when condoms are not used properly. That's an option, of course, not a requirement, but since you were concerned enough to post here and ask about this, I can only assume pregnancy is not something you want any larger a risk of than necessary.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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its2014
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The semen was all over the shaft of the penis. He used trojan magnum which comes with a reservoir tip already. I guess slip-off and breakage are not just the two ways a condom fail. You guys should add leakage to it.

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Heather
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Well, it seems to me what you are describing IS a kind of slip-off. But again, we can't know. What we CAN know is that condoms, when not used properly, are substantially less effective than when used properly, and we talk a great deal here about how to use them properly and how important that is. If someone does not want condoms to fail, and wants them to be as effective as they can be, they need to use them correctly, and I think that's very clear here, you know?

Do you want to talk about your options with EC? And do you or your boyfriend want some links to find out how to use condoms properly, for next times?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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its2014
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Yes I am going to the cvs now to get EC. Thank you.

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Heather
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Sure thing.

If you all want those links later or to talk through how to use condoms right anytime, just give a holler. [Smile]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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its2014
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Please help answer this..If he used a condom and left room on the tip and he didn't withdraw immediately is that considered a condom failure?

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Heather
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Let me try and be clear, first.

When it comes to contraception,a condom working = no one becomes pregnant. A condom failing = someone becomes pregnant. That's what failure means, with any method, and it all about.

Otherwise, we can talk about proper or improper use, and we can also talk about things that we know make it more likely for a given method to fail, and less effective when used.

So, with this new scenario you are putting out there, you'd then only be talking about one, rather than two, ways of not using condoms properly, so right there, that means that would be less likely to result in a failure than two ways of mucking it up. But even with that scenario, if sticking around in the vagina resulted in the condom, with ejaculate in it, sliding around, then that can result in it sliding off. If that did not happen, then no, in this scenario, failure would not be likely.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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its2014
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Okay thanks for your answer. I am just asking what ways a condom can fail, not what leads to the failure.

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its2014
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So if a condom doesn't slip off or break we have nothing to worry about when it comes to pregnancy, right?

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Sam W
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As we've said previously, we can't know for sure what the risk was in the situations you mentioned, since we know the condom was used at least partially incorrectly but weren't there watching what happened. So, if either of those scenarios you described are what happened to you, then you should follow through with your plan to get EC.
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its2014
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I didn't get a straight answer from this site. What is the point of even asking. Thanks.

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Heather
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I tried very hard to give you a straight answer the best that we can with a question like this. But I'd say this is one where, ultimately, I get you want a definitive answer but we just can't give that kind of answer to something like this. I did my best to try and make clear why that is.

I also feel like part of the problem is a framework of "failure" that doesn't really work, which I tried to address as well.

If none of that met your needs, our apologies, but all we can do is our best with what we have to work with.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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