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Author Topic: Period question
Calliegrace
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So I was fingered with possible Precum about 10-15 minutes of it being on a hand and after touching a few objects (door knob, pair of shorts , a t shirt, my hair, his face, etc.) and I got my period 2 days after this and it lasted for the normal 6 or 7 days, my question is , no matter how soon your period comes after any kind of risk (I don't think I had much of a risk) does that mean you can't be pregnant ?
Posts: 71 | From: Los angles | Registered: Sep 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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Callie: let's not go back to this kind of conversation together, one we have now had many times.

I noticed during that time off you took from posting you were still here daily, sometimes for many hours, marinating in pregnancy scare posts. I was hoping you would have used that time to step away from obsession with this, ideally to seek out some help with that, like from a healthcare provider. Have you done that yet?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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I think another good avenue or productive conversation for us could be to talk about why you are still choosing to engage in activities you know you cannot handle and know scare you.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Calliegrace
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I haven't done anything more to scare me it's just that I didn't know if the period I had would make sure that I couldn't be pregnant from it
Posts: 71 | From: Los angles | Registered: Sep 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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So this is still about the very same situation we have been talking with you about this whole time? Where we have already discussed all of this with you already?

Have you reviewed all our previous conversations with you to review this same information you are asking for now? Reviewed the many links we have given you that have this answer as part of them? If not, and you insist on staying focused on this, despite our setting limits around it, then those are your options to get this answer again. But as I have tried very hard to make clear with you, we have set a limit with you about these kinds of continued, repeated questions and we are not going to keep engaging you with them, for a whole host of reasons, including that it is as unhealthy for someone obsessing like this to help keep them obsessed as it is to give a bottle of booze to an alcoholic. Seriously. It is our job to do what we do as responsibly and soundly as possible: you need to atop pushing us to do otherwise.

Also, again, have you yet connected with a healthcare provider about this, beit a mental healthcare provider or a sexual healthcare provider?

[ 12-01-2013, 10:38 AM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Heather
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Just FYI, I see that this morning, you again started reading a bunch of pregnancy scare posts.

Callie, I have to tell you that this clearly is not helping you. Obviously, if our answers and the facts were going to make a difference with how you feel, they would have way before now. Most likely, this not only just is not helping you, it is probably making things worse. As I tried to explain above, feeding an obsession - staying in it, continuing to focus on it - only tends to keep people stuck in obsession or give it a stronger hold. To let go of it...well, you have to work on letting go of it, which includes seeking out help for obsessive thoughts or anxiety, and then following what your healthcare provider helping you with it suggests.

If you do not want to seek out healthcare for this and are going it DIY, then, at a minimum. You have to work hard on your own to stay away from what is triggering your anxiety, which in this case, is clearly a focus on pregnancy and pregnancy fears.

I am not saying any of this to make you feel bad or to be a jerk: I am saying it in the interest of actually helping you per what we know does and does not work with people in this spot, approaches you will find are very well supported by mental health research and practice in this area.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Calliegrace
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I'm going talk to a gynecologist about this very soon, and I suppose that staying away for this topic is the best it just always pops into my mind. I'm sorry for all of the trouble I've given you! I've never had problems with anxiety before so I don't know how to handle it and keep it under control
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Heather
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Which is why I keep suggesting that you see what you can do to seek out a mental healthcare provider, which a GYN is not. It just seems very clear to me that it is mental healthcare you need, not reproductve healthcare.

It is a mental health expert who can help evaluate your anxiety and then start to help you learn to manage it. A GYN cannot do that, and I expect that if you go see a GYN, they are going to say the exact same thing I have been to you in this regard.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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In the meantime, btw, when this subject does come into your mind, rather than seeking out more of it, you will want to start trying hard to go find something ELSE to do and focus on.

How else do you spend your free time? On a day you have spent here burying yourself in pregnancy scare posts for hours, how else could you be spending that time? What do you like to do that really engages you, that you are passionate about, or that you find soothing?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Calliegrace
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Taking a warm bath is always soothing to me, but I think I start to worry around more the time of my period coming maybe reading would get my mind off of things
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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Let me try this again: when you are not here for hours reading posts, how do you spend your time? Not the time it takes for a bath: more hours than that.

Also, do you need help finding a mental healthcare provider?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Calliegrace
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I like to read on my free time, and no I think my mother found one for me, thank you though!
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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Do you have access to a good bookstore or library? If so how about I collect some books for you in a list about anxiety and coping with it?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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